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When it comes to the dating scene in the current climate of meeting new people through designated apps and "swiping right," Mesa resident Joshua Senitza, 26, calls the digital experience "not desirable."
"I feel like it's a risk," Senitza said. "It kind of feels like you're playing 20 Questions."
For many Generation Z daters like Senitza, who recalled his own familiarity with dating apps, forming relationships online has become the "new normal," a recent study from Forbes suggests .
In a national survey conducted by DatingNews , a company that researches the logistics of the dating industry, nearly the entire generation of adults born between 1997 and 2012 are "tired" of using dating apps, citing " emotional burnout " and "too many choices" as among the leading reasons of ditching popular dating apps such as Hinge, Bumble, and Tinder when looking for a potential match.
For Gen Z residents of the Valley, where Tinder is the most popular dating app in 2024 , app exhaustion affects the entire generation, with over 30% of adults in this age group experiencing emotional and mental distress due to online dating, according to the study.
With 42% of Tinder's Arizona users in the Gen Z age range and a platform audience exceeding 31,000 individuals, the Valley's young adult demographic is increasingly seeking alternative methods for finding potential matches as they move away from dating apps, the study reported.
For Sameera Sullivan, a matchmaking professional serving the Valley, the Arizona market can be "challenging" for young daters seeking in-person connections.
"Arizona is a very interesting place. There's a lot of people moving here from other places ... and it's difficult for Gen Z to meet the right kind of people," Sullivan said. "So it's made the dating scene a little bit more challenging for them."
"Too many options"
For Senitza, the wide selection and availability of partners to choose from on dating apps has been the biggest challenge of the dating scene in the Valley.
"You can go on one date and things may be fine. You could think, 'This one's great, but maybe I could find someone better if I keep staying on this dating app,'" said Senitza. "The idea of options can really deteriorate the whole dating life."
Mesa resident Ryleigh Dyer, 23, expressed similar sentiments when it comes to the idea of "too many options" when searching for a romantic connection online.
"It just puts a huge block in it all, because there's always that ready availability to see someone else," Dyer said. "The grass is always greener on the other side."
The issue of "choice paralysis" can be overwhelming, the study showed, with the experience of "holding out for a better match" through dating apps affecting over half of Valley Zoomers.
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"You never know if it's the real person."
Citing the burnout as "digital fatigue," the survey also presented other unique dating challenges to the generation, including communication barriers with potential partners due to apps.
For Senitza, being able to communicate with potential partners has been the "hardest part" when it comes to online dating.
"I feel like communication is pretty rough in the beginning when you're on dating apps. You're really just texting ... and not everything is said," said Senitza. "That communication isn't very upfront until you meet in person. I've noticed I'll text someone, and that person's a great texter, but then in-person, they don't really have those communicative skills on that one-to-one scenario."
Dyer, who decisively "stays away from dating apps," believes deception and a lack of authenticity in potential partners also harbor "major disadvantages" when it comes to online dating.
"You never know if that's the real person," Dyer said. "You never know if that's actually them or not."
Sullivan, who also expressed her doubts on the transparency of dating profiles, shared similar sentiments.
"Online dating apps create a delusion. Not everything is what it seems," Sullivan said. "With in person ... it’s more of a personal thing. It's not superficial, there's some substance there."
Sullivan also referred to online dating as "an exhausting process" for Gen Z, who believes they may be missing out on potential matches due to the "superficiality" of dating profiles.
"Swiping culture has become too popular where you can't really tell anything about someone from a few pictures and a few words," Sullivan said. "You can't just go by pictures only. It's not an accurate representation of someone."
Mesa resident Kaylee Underwood, 21, compared the inconsistencies of dating profiles versus meeting in person with "shopping," citing some people who date online as possibly "putting up a front."
"It's like shopping for a book. The cover can be deceiving," Underwood said. "Seeing a dating profile, you kind of get the gist of it, but you don't actually get the insight if it's true to who they really are."
"You have to adapt."
With the rise of dating apps over the past decade, modern technology and social media continue to change the way people meet, bringing "unprecedented problems" and experiences in the dating scene that separates Gen Z from their older counterparts, the study explained.
For Senitza, the landscape of modern romance is "very different" compared to generations before.
"You hear the talks of people meeting in person, meeting at a bar. Without the technology that we have today, dating was a lot different from … how our parents met," Senitza said. "You can totally tell it's a big 180 change from what it was before."
For Underwood, modern factors such as social media continue to "complicate" the ways Gen Z meet and interact, citing issues such as infidelity "playing a big part" in how relationships are formed.
"It’s just another outlet for cheating to occur," Underwood said. "I feel like social media in and of itself is definitely an issue now, which wasn't necessarily a thing before."
For Dyer, sharing "similar values" is key to a relationship, something which can be difficult to find amongst members of her generation, she said.
"I don't like to do online dating. I like to go out and meet people. But there's certain things that I don't do that a lot of my generation does," Dyer said. "I feel like a lot of people my age nowadays are emotionally unavailable. I don't really know why. But it makes it hard."
Despite these obstacles, the technological environment continues to shape how Gen Z dates, the study said, while the added pressures of digital romance forces the age group to "learn as they go," according to Senitza.
"You have to adapt to the current generation changes," said Senitza. "It's kind of how it is."
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"In person, it feels more natural."
Amid these concerns, the findings revealed that nearly all Gen Z Arizonans prefer to meet potential partners in person. According to the study, 96% of Phoenix-area Zoomers favor traditional in-person courtship methods over dating apps.
Among these methods, organized meet-ups like speed dating and blind dates are the most popular, with 22% of Gen Z Arizonans preferring these concentrated matchmaking events over other in-person dating options. This approach is notably more popular in the Valley compared to the national average, the study reported.
Other in-person dating preferences, such as meeting through friends and family, social gatherings, and local events, scored lower than the national average, although still held higher preference rankings over online dating, the study showed.
With 90% of her clientele made up of Arizonans, Sullivan says there has been a surge of Phoenix-area Zoomers approaching her agency for matchmaking services in the past few years.
"Matchmaking is getting more popular in Arizona, even amongst Gen Z people," Sullivan said. "I think it's a really great way to meet people."
For Underwood, one of the best ways to date in-person is meeting someone who shares the same "circle of friends."
"It might be easier to meet friends of friends just because it's a lot easier to segue into hanging out with that person," Underwood said. "It's less awkward because you have probably already been around each other if you're all part of a larger friend group."
For Senitza, traditional methods of dating tend to be more "natural," whereas online romancing "can feel more like a game."
According to the study, nearly 30% of Valley Gen Z share a similar attitude, citing misuse of dating apps as another significant reason to step away from them altogether.
"I think traditionally ... you can probably have more of a conversation and be a little bit more in-depth in what you're talking about," Senitza said. "You can kind of elaborate more and pick up more on body language. And just have more of a better feel of that person when you're meeting in person compared to dating apps."
Dating apps can also cause people of his generation to feel "constantly stuck," Senitza continued.
"We already are so consumed on our phones, and I think (in-person dating) is a great way to break that habit," Senitza said. "In person, it feels more natural."
Finding common ground
While preferences for meeting in-person are at an all-time high for Gen Z Arizonans, there still could be a few advantages to online dating, Underwood noted.
"If you meet someone online, you probably have talked for an extensive amount of time ... and know something about them before going out," Underwood said. "So it's like a little bit more familiarity that you maybe wouldn't have in a traditional route of in-person dating."
Senitza, who met his significant other through a dating app, believes online dating can help "make sure you're on the same page" with a potential match, ensuring to establish common ground in order to mitigate risk.
"The goal in mind is not just finding a lover, but someone that can be friends and lets me be who I am without having to act like I'm a different person," Senitza said.
Developing a friendship is a common thread among Valley Gen Z, as both Dyer and Underwood also believe being friends with a potential romantic partner first is "key" in any relationship, digital or otherwise.
"How I'm coming to see it now is if I feel like I'm going to be with somebody, I want to be their friend first," Dyer said. "That's how I prefer it."
And while she isn't seeking a relationship anytime soon, Dyer remains optimistic.
"If I meet somebody that's in the same flow of life as me, that would be perfect," Dyer said. "I look to the future on it."
This article originally appeared on Arizona Republic: 'You have to adapt': New study reveals Gen Z dating preferences in Arizona
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