Cincinnati Police Chief Teresa Theetge's heart − if not her approach − was in the right place last week when she blamed Cincinnati Public Schools for feeding into a "school-to-prison pipeline." The chief called out district leaders for not stepping up to offer resources and personnel to help police with unruly students at Cincinnati Metro transit centers. But the group Theetge and this city really need to "step up" are the parents of these disorderly teens.
Parental involvement and accountability are the most direct and effective solutions to dealing with out-of-control youth. Theetge said something at that Sept. 23 schoo l board meeting that I wholeheartedly agree with: Police should not be the only people these teens should have to answer to. Parents must do a better job of policing their kids − period.
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If parents can't control their rebellious teens, then let's find ways to get them assistance − counseling, parenting classes, mentors, or other available resources. If they refuse to get a handle on their child's misbehavior, then these parents should face attention-getting consequences for their negligence. Immature youth shouldn't be the only ones paying a penalty.
Instead of pointing fingers at each other, the police department and school district should be united in getting parents and/or guardians − the most desperately needed resource − to the table. Police and educators are being put in an unenviable and unfair position these days. They are expected to be social workers, therapists, nutritionists, babysitters, and more in addition to the duties spelled out in their job descriptions. Both groups are being asked to go above and beyond − unreasonably at times − to cover for bad parenting. Their frustration is understandable because they tend to get blamed for not adequately cleaning up a mess that belongs to absentee mothers and fathers.
Think about it. The district is being asked to send personnel to certain bus hubs after school to help monitor and control students − never mind they have limited authority off of school grounds. These might be employees who have already put in an eight-hour-plus workday and are now expected to work overtime, taking precious time away from their own families and interests, to deal with someone else's child's misbehavior.
And trust me, the police would rather not have to manage these kids either. Too much potential for things to go wrong. That's the sense of urgency, the cry for help you heard from Theetge. Everybody's worst fear is an officer getting into a tussle with a student and one of them getting seriously injured or killed, especially with so many people carrying guns these days. Such incidents tear communities apart. Cincinnati has been there and done that. Nobody wants to see the sequel to that horror show.
Theetge and her officers deserve credit for the patience and restraint they've shown down at Government Square and other transit centers. They've been a thoughtful partner with community leaders and volunteers who they've invited to help maintain calm and offer solutions and resources. Cincinnati police have avoided any major blow-ups that could set back progress in police-community relations while dealing with youth-involved brawls, assaults, robberies and shots-fired incidents.
Still, this situation feels like a ticking time bomb without the proper parental involvement.
You can change bus routes. You can put more school officials and community volunteers at transit centers. You can even send in more police to make arrests. But none of these things interventions are a substitute for the love, discipline and attention of parents.
If I messed up when I was a teenager, I was more afraid of what my mom and dad would do to me when I got home than I was the police or some school administrator. Truthfully, I might have preferred to stay with the police for protection from my mother who didn't suffer fools. That's because my parents set a standard for the behavior they expected of me and made sure I understood the consequences should I choose to step out of line. That didn't mean I never thought about misbehaving, but it did make me think twice before I made a move that could get me in trouble.
That type of parenting is missing in too many households, not just in Cincinnati, but across our nation. The disintegration of the nuclear family has played no small part in where we find ourselves. Some might argue there are very good reasons why some parents or guardians have a tough time raising their children − poverty, single parenting, substance abuse, housing and food insecurity, etc. In some cases, you have elderly grandparents trying to raise their teenage and adolescent grandchildren. That's why we need our city leaders, schools, nonprofits and business sector to "step up" with resources to help struggling parents get better, but more importantly, be there for their kids.
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The saying "it takes a village to raise a child" means that a child needs a community of people to help them grow up in a safe and healthy environment. It does not mean that the village bears the responsibility of teaching your child what he or she should be learning at home.
Cincinnati can no longer afford for parents to be M.I.A, and the streets can't continue to raise our kids. And we have to stop blaming the police and our schools for kids who behave badly and sometimes violently. Discipline starts at home. So should accountability.
Opinion and Engagement Editor Kevin S. Aldridge can be reached at kaldridge@enquirer.com. On X: @kevaldrid
This article originally appeared on Cincinnati Enquirer: Opinion: Parents of unruly teens must step up to help police, schools with youth violence
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