Ben Affleck And JLo: What A Therapist Thinks Probably Happened After The Couple Rekindled

Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez are headed for divorce . After spending a summer apart amid rumors of a split, the rumors finally turned out to be true last month.

While the second time around at first appeared to be the storybook relationship for Affleck and Lopez that many fans had dreamed of, it’s now clear that whatever prevented the couple from getting together the first time around was perhaps still an issue the second time around, which leads many fans to ask the question: just what happened?

While we certainly don’t know the answer, a couples therapist, Landis Bejar, who is not and has not treated the couple, spoke with Business Insider about what may have been at play in this case. It’s been suggested by some that the couple got back together in an attempt to find closure from their relationship the first time around. Bejar suggests that without closure it’s possible to even look back on a failed relationship in a positive light. She explained…

Bejar suggests that Affleck and Lopez may not have reflected on the reasons for the breakup and how each of them may have contributed to it. As a result, the issues that led to the split the first time eventually repeated themselves, bringing the couple back to the same place. Bejar continued...

While closure is a valid goal, the therapist says there’s a “myth” surrounding it, which is that it requires the other person to achieve it. Closure is, according to Bejar, about accepting the end of the relationship, understanding why it ended, and moving on, and none of that actually requires reconnecting with the other party. Bejar said…

Neither Affleck or Lopez has spoken publicly about the divorce, so we don’t know how much, if at all, closure played into the relationship or its conclusion. Lopez was the one who filed for divorce, doing so without a lawyer. Whether that means the decision to split started with her is unclear.

Whether this recent split was caused by the same things that caused the first, or something entirely new, at this point all fans of either star can hope is that Affleck and Lopez will get closure and be able to move on.