Borderlands Review: Borderline Unwatchable

“I don’t think anyone would call Borderlands art, but it’s fun,” This is a quote from Oscar-winning actress Cate Blanchett, who stars in this film. Regardless of the end of her sentence, being unable to regard this film as art says everything you need to know. This movie is based on the Gearbox Software video game series and features an incredible ensemble cast. We have one of the greatest actresses in the game as our lead, along with Kevin Hart and Jack Black, who are on loan from the Jumanji series. Oscar-winner Jamie Lee Curtis joins the mix, as does Barbie alumni Ariana Greenblatt and boxer-turned-actor Florian Munteanu.

Borderlands is borderline unwatchable. It may not claim the title of the worst blockbuster of the year (that honor remains reserved for Madame Web), but it certainly disappoints in its lack of entertainment value. I have not played the game this movie is based on, so I can’t reasonably comment on how faithful the adaptation is. All I can comment on is how well the film works on its own, and it doesn’t. This is a frustratingly bland movie masquerading as a movie filled with personality.

The film starts visually like a Star Wars movie during its prison break sequence. Tiny Tina (Greenblatt) is trapped but is rescued by Roland (Hart). Once Roland removes his mask, the movie embraces a slightly sillier tone. However, the action is almost always directed seriously. I can’t imagine people taking Kevin Hart seriously as an action hero, but that’s what this movie asks of us. We then meet Lillith (Blanchett), a gun-toting badass with an itchy trigger finger. She’s a bounty hunter sent on a task to find the captive Tiny Tina.

At first, it’s puzzling to see Lillith set out to rescue a person we already saw saved in the opening scene, but Borderlands moves at a brisk pace. It introduces our main characters early on, the plot points fly by, and we’re treated to a decently fun car chase with most of our leading players at the end of our first act. However, this is where the film’s positives end. We soon find ourselves in the midst of a plot that lacks interesting twists and turns. It’s a series of set pieces that often feel like part of the video game, but none of it adds any depth to the characters or the story.

Borderlands has had quite a long production history. It was filmed over three years ago, and in the time since, Blanchett starred in her Oscar-nominated role in Tár (she would prepare for that film between takes for Borderlands), director Eli Roth filmed and released an entire other movie named Thanksgiving, and two weeks of reshoots occurred from Deadpool and Terminator: Dark Fate director Tim Miller. Craig Mazin, the original writer who recently co-created HBO’s The Last of Us, also stepped away from the project. All this points to this project being a poor afterthought from creatives whose talent far exceeds this film.

Blanchett is incapable of giving a bad performance in anything. She’s a cool character, but the film attempts to give her a backstory surrounding her mother, whom she barely remembers. The emotional backstory does not work in the slightest, leaving the audience disconnected from her character. You don’t feel anything for her, even in the final act, which requires you to feel for her character. Hart gives a good performance, but his character is the most boring person in the film. No amount of short jokes and Hart-isms can make you invested in a character who has nothing on the page.

Many will single out Jack Black’s voice role as Claptrap, a loudmouth robot that teams up with Lillith early on and becomes the comedic relief. Black has turned in outstanding voice work in the Kung Fu Panda movies and The Super Mario Bros. Movie. Unfortunately, his work here is some of his worst. None of the humor in this movie lands, leaving the audience devoid of any entertainment. There are many jokes, but most of them do not get any laughs. Black is basically screaming his dialogue the entire time, which gets very grating after a while. Greenblatt is doing the same thing, which does not make her an easy character to like.

Curtis gives a forgettable performance as Dr. Patricia Tannis. The villains are an exceptionally weak aspect of this film. They barely show up. By the time a villain shows up during the final act, I had completely forgotten they existed because they hadn’t physically been in the movie for far too long. Another villain is mainly discussed, but we don’t see their misdeeds until the final act. The movie’s selling point is a bunch of colorful characters teaming up for some big action sequences. But even the action feels mediocre, and you don’t grow to like these characters, nor do we see how their dynamic evolves.

There’s one sequence where a character takes on many villains at once. We cut away, and then when we cut back, they have killed all the villains. It would have been much more entertaining to see how they got out of that situation, especially given how insurmountable the odds were. We also have characters like Claptrap and Tiny Tina continually making decisions that get the characters in trouble, which is always a nuisance that never gets us on their side. The movie also never knows when to slow down during its action. The action is always consistently chaotic, rather than offering peaks of violence and valleys of tension.

Ultimately, Borderlands fails to deliver the cinematic experience it should. It’s one of Roth’s weakest films, offering little excitement or laughs.

SCORE: 3/10

As ComingSoon’s review policy explains, a score of 3 equates to “Bad.” Due to significant issues, this media feels like a chore to take in.

Disclosure: ComingSoon attended a press screening for our Borderlands review.

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