There’s Nothing Like a Black Family Cookout

When it comes to experiences of Black joy, there’s nothing like the Black family cookout ! It’s where family and friends come together to enjoy food and fellowship, as well as to reconnect and secure the bonds that their elders and ancestors created.

Cookouts can happen just because the weather is warm, but many cookouts happen for special occasions, like birthdays or holidays. So, as many prepare to celebrate the last big summer holiday, Labor Day, Black family cookouts will be happening nationwide.

Celebrating Black Families

“A Black family cookout gives you a chance to be together, to be in the sun and get rid of all those pretenses and just have a good time,” says Demetric Gillespie, co-owner of The Fun Factory in Randallstown, a suburb of Baltimore, Maryland.

He and his wife Talea run a party rental company with many clients renting bouncy houses and water slides for their Black family cookouts. Last year, the Gillespies hosted the “Baltimore Big Black Cookout” at the city’s Druid Hill Park to thank their customers for their support. “It was like a city-wide family reunion,” Gillespie exclaims.

Tracey Farley-Artis knows about city-wide family reunions. As executive director of the National Black Family Reunion in Cincinnati, Ohio, she leads an event founded by the late Dr. Dorothy Height in 1988.

“The mission of the Black Family Reunion is to unite, educate, uplift and celebrate Black families,” Farley-Artis emphasizes. “It’s free and open to the public and we ask families to wear their family reunion T-shirts, and they bring picnic baskets into the park with their own food. I think at the very core and essence of the Black community is food.”

Black Family Cookout Food

You could almost smell and taste the food in the scene from the film, “Poetic Justice” where the aroma of barbeque on the grill made the characters crash a family reunion.

So what are the must-haves for Black family cookout food? “You’ll see ribs, steak, turkey chops, and here in Baltimore, you know you’ve got to have some crabs at the cookout,” exclaims Gillespie.

“We have a food court at the park, where Black businesses have their food trucks, booths and displays,” states Farley-Artis. “They cook everything from chicken to ribs, to fried fish, to hotdogs, hamburgers and all things related to a cookout,” she adds.

“Some of my favorite side dishes at a Black family cookout or reunion are baked beans, macaroni salad, garden salad and fruit salad,” notes Farley-Artis.

Boasting, Gillespie says, “My wife makes the best deviled eggs in the Mid-Atlantic. They love her deviled eggs so much that we go to Sam’s and buy the 72-pack of eggs,” he laughs. “I also love my mama’s baked beans! She takes three or four cans of vegetarian baked beans with a can of petite diced stewed tomatoes, green onions and brown sugar, then she puts it in the oven for 30 minutes to let it caramelize, and man it’s a whole different situation.”

He also notes that Black family cookout food should be homemade and not bought from the store, including the lemonade. “If you’re going to do a half & half (lemonade & tea), you need to use real lemons and real tea bags, not that powdered mix,” he admonishes.

So what else should you NOT bring to a Black family cookout? “The easy thing to say would be potato salad with raisins in it,” laughs Gillespie. “But I would also say, don’t bring anything without seasoning in it! You’ve gotta put some soul into it!”

“I think the Black family cookout is something that happens throughout the Black diaspora. It’s just part of the culture and we have to be sure to continue passing on the Black family cookout tradition to the youth for our future.” Demetric Gillespie

Must Have Black Family Cookout Songs

And speaking of “soul,” what are the best Black family cookout songs to get the fam on their feet? In the film, “How Stella Got Her Groove Back,” “Flashlight” by Parliament Funkadelic was playing in the cookout scene, while “Family Reunion” by The O’Jays was playing in the cookout scene in the film, “Poetic Justice.”

“At a Black family cookout, you’ve got to have Will Smith’s [DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince] ‘Summertime,’ you gotta have ‘Before I Let Go,’ by Franky Beverly and Maze and Beyonce’s version, too,” says Gillespie.

He adds, “I gotta hear ‘Juicy’ [by Mtume] and the Biggie Smalls version, ‘It’s all a Dream.’ The music should be up-tempo and uplifting with positive lyrics.”

Farley-Artist adds some of the musical acts that were at this year’s National Black Family Reunion. “We had Doug E. Fresh on our Urban Stage, Rickey Dillard on our Gospel Stage and Jazz Alley to hear Jazz music,” she notes.

“We also had line dancing and steppers.” You can’t have a good Black family cookout without playing line dancing music.  “Absolutely! You’re gonna do the Cha Cha Slide, you’re gonna do the Cupid Shuffle, you’re gonna do the new African [Jerusalema] slide, the original Electric Slide – that’s how you get the party going,” Gillespie shares.

A few more popular Black family cookout songs include: “Wobble” by V.I.C,  “Candy” by Cameo, “Hey Ya!” by Outkast, “Hot Fun in the Summertime” by Sly & The Family Stone, “One Nation Under a Groove,” by Parliament Funkadelic, “Crazy in Love” by Beyonce, “Push It” by Salt-N-Pepa, “Harvest for the World” by The Isley Brothers, “And the Beat Goes On” by The Whispers and practically anything by Earth Wind and Fire. Gillespie offers a tip to the Black family cookout DJs: “If you’re playing Rap, you need to play the edited/clean version because grandmama is here and we have to be respectful to our elders.”

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Black Family Cookout Games

The cookout scene in the film, “Boyz n the Hood” where the characters were playing dominoes, and the cookout scene in the movie, “How Stella Got Her Groove Back,” where the characters were playing spades, emphasize Black family cookout games.

“But don’t come to the spades table if you don’t know how to play cards and if you have thin skin,” Gillespie admonishes. “And don’t come here underbidding or reneging because we’re not here to teach you today,” he laughs.

“Some of the younger people might play Uno. And back in the day in the country, they used to play horseshoes,” Gillespie adds. “People also play volleyball and many cookouts today rent inflatables for the kids, like the water slides and bouncy houses and sometimes a basketball hoop.”

But Farley-Artis says a Black family cookout or reunion shouldn’t just be about fun and games. “Education is very important in our family, so we give away education scholarships every year at our reunions. And we educate our young people on the ACT and SAT exams and about various colleges they can attend,” says Farley-Artist, who plans her family’s biannual reunions all across the country.

Also, at the National Black Family Reunion, there are pavilions that focus on spirituality, health screenings and jobs. “I know people who have come to Christ and people who got employment at our event,” Farley-Artis shares.

Black Family Cookout Vibe

With the social media trend of deciding who is and is NOT invited to the cookout, there is a Black family cookout vibe. “The vibe at a Black family cookout or reunion is togetherness, it’s strength, it’s love, it’s breaking bread, it’s fellowship,” states Farley-Artis.

Gillespie adds, “Don’t bring bad vibes or bad energy to a Black family cookout.”  Farley-Artis says with conviction adds, “Seeing Black people come together uplifts my spirit and makes me know that we as a people are strong.”

“When you think about melanated people, people from Africa, I think cooking outside and grilling has always been part of our history; it’s part of our DNA,” adds Gillespie.  “It’s a way to enjoy being outside in the sun, and Black people need the sun.”

He concludes with seriousness, “Just understanding how close we still are to slavery and Jim Crow and segregation, we have to honor what our elders and ancestors went through to get us to where we are today…I think the Black family cookout is something that happens throughout the Black diaspora. It’s just part of the culture and we have to be sure to continue passing on the Black family cookout tradition to the youth for our future.”

This story originally appeared in Cuisine Noir Magazine