10 Little Actions That Tell You You Shouldn't Deal With Someone

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Sometimes the biggest obstacles in a relationship or friendship aren’t the obvious betrayals or rudeness. It’s the small, often overlooked behaviors that subtly reveal a person’s true nature. While a major breach of trust, such as lying, cheating, or stealing, can clearly define a person’s character, it’s the tiny red flags—seemingly insignificant actions—that often go unnoticed until it’s too late.

Here are ten small but telling signs that can tell you more about a person's character than you might think at first glance. Be careful, especially if you observe several of these behaviors in the same person.

1. Disregard for general agreements and promises

When someone disregards simple, everyday manners, it speaks volumes about their respect for others. It may seem like a small oversight, but it is telling. For example, not locking the door behind them, not cleaning up after themselves, or ignoring established social norms may indicate a deeper disregard for the people around them.

As William Shakespeare wrote, "Clothes often betray the man" - and so do these small slights.

2. Chronic lateness

Punctuality is not only about being on time, but also about showing respect for other people's time. Some people may have serious difficulties with time management, and being regularly late shows disregard for other people's schedules and can undermine trust.

As the old saying goes, "Time is the most valuable thing a person can spend." If someone consistently disrespects your time, it may be a sign that they don't value you.

3. Crossing the line

Respect for personal space and privacy is crucial in any relationship. When someone invades your privacy—by going through your things, looking at your phone, or asking intrusive questions—they are crossing an important boundary. Such actions often show a lack of respect for your autonomy and can lead to more serious violations.

The philosopher Epictetus once said, "We have two ears and one mouth, so we can listen twice as much as we speak."

If someone is more interested in invading your space than understanding you, that's a red flag.

4. Frequent embellishments and lies

Lying is often perceived as a major betrayal, but even small lies or persistent embellishments can be telling. When someone frequently adds unnecessary details, omits key facts, or subtly distorts the truth, they are often trying to manipulate the narrative to their advantage.

"Truth, as Mark Twain once said, is the most valuable thing we have, so let us economize on it. If someone consistently neglects the truth, it is a sign of deep dishonesty."

5. Constantly criticizing others

A person who habitually criticizes others is often projecting their own insecurities and shortcomings. When someone constantly belittles others, it is usually a reflection of their inner turmoil. This behavior can also be a form of self-defense, where they put others down to make themselves feel better.

If someone is constantly dividing and criticizing, they may be more interested in conflict than in building relationships.

6. Love of gossip

Gossip may seem harmless, but when someone thrives on spreading rumors and talking behind others' backs, it's a clear sign of their character. A person who lives off gossip often suffers from deep self-doubt and is prone to passive aggression.

As Joseph Conrad noted, gossip is often “most pleasant to hear, and most pleasant to repeat.”

But indulging in them can undermine trust and breed negativity. If gossip is a person's main hobby, they may not be the most reliable interlocutor.

7. Evil humor

Humor can reveal a lot about a person’s values. When someone’s jokes are consistently mean or derogatory, it’s often a sign of underlying hostility or a desire to put others down. As the saying goes, “A joke is a very serious thing,” and bad jokes can often be a mask for deeper issues. If someone’s humor makes you feel uncomfortable or offended, it’s worth considering what that says about them.

8. Refined Cruelty

Even minor acts of cruelty, often disguised as jokes or offhand comments, can be a serious warning sign. Someone who enjoys seeing others suffer, even in small ways, may be exhibiting a dark side to their personality. This behavior is often driven by a need for control or a lack of empathy.

As Mahatma Gandhi said, "The greatness of a nation can be judged by the way its animals are treated."

If someone is abusive to others, especially the most vulnerable, it is a clear sign that they are not worth your time.

9. Two-faced behavior

People who change their behavior dramatically depending on who they are interacting with often struggle with authenticity. If someone is overly flattering to their superiors but dismissive or cruel to those they consider inferior, this is a sign of a manipulative and insincere character.

10. Signs of greed

Greed, whether for money, attention, or power, can ruin a person’s character. Someone who is overly focused on what they can get rather than what they can give is unlikely to be a generous or supportive conversationalist. Greed often manifests itself in small ways—like failing to pay off a small debt or hoarding freebies—and can be a sign of a deeper selfishness.

As the saying goes, " The love of money is the root of all evil ," and if someone chooses greed over generosity, it's best to keep your distance.

While these small actions may seem insignificant on their own, when taken together they can paint a clear picture of a person’s character. Pay attention to these subtle signs and remember that actions, even the smallest ones, often speak louder than words. Choosing to surround yourself with people who are kind, respectful, and honest will lead to healthier, more fulfilling relationships.

What do you think about this? What else would you add? Share in the comments!