After 21 seasons coaching and 18 leading the Mt. Hebron program, boys lacrosse coach Mike McCarthy announced he was stepping down. McCarthy led the Vikings to the state title in 2006 and reached the state championship game in 2016, 2022 and 2023.
The long-time coach talked with the Howard County Times about his decision to step down and what he’ll miss most about coaching in the latest edition of Varsity Q&A.
Note: Questions and answers have been edited for brevity and clarity
How long have you been pondering this decision and why was now the right time?
So, it’s probably been in the back of our minds collectively as a group probably for the last five to six years. Just taking it year by year to see if we could do it to the level that we expected of ourselves and that we felt like the kids, our school and our program deserved. While at the same time, managing a family, with me personally having four kids and my assistants all having young children. It was kind of readdressed every year. It’s been hard every year, but it was much more difficult this year, just trying to keep up and be a present father and also a present coach. At a certain point, you feel like you’re not giving anybody what they deserve. I felt it more this year than ever before.
Probably a couple of weeks into the season was when I kind of knew that it was going to be our last year together. My assistant Matt Haley, who I’ve been with for 15 years and Mike Tittsworth, who I’ve been with for 21 years and we also played together in high school, and my dad all were going to step down at the end of the year anyway. I was still seeing if we could make it work. You don’t get these times back with your kids and to be present for the things they did, their father to be around and coach or be at their games or school activities has become more of a priority for us.
What was that moment like when you shared the news with the team?
I told our team and parents at our banquet. It was rough. There are so many amazing relationships that we have developed throughout the past 21 years. With this group, it was hard. It was on one sense a relief to know that I was making the right decision for our family. Then, on another sense, it was painful. You put all of your time, energy and commitment to something that you care about deeply in our program, our kids, our Hebron families, the school and our community. It’s been a huge part not only my life, but the McCarthy family and my kids’ lives. As they’ve grown up around it and admired our players as mentors and kids that they look up to want to be like, it was bittersweet for sure. Everybody was shocked a little bit.
There was a moment on Mother’s Day when I was at my son’s baseball game. I dropped him off to warm up and I’m sitting in my car watching film. The game started and I came out and watched the game. Then he comes back in the car and says, ‘Did you see my hits, do you see me make that catch?’ I said, ‘Yeah, buddy I saw them.’ He just keeps going and I said, ‘Cooper, I saw everything buddy. I was there.’ He goes, ‘You were actually there.’ It wasn’t meant in a malicious way and I had already made my decision at that point. But, if there was any going back on it, I just knew that was it. We’ve put a lot into this for 21 years and have certainly gotten more in return than we ever expected from the Mt. Hebron community and are forever grateful to all of our players and their families and friends that have made this such a special ride for our family.
What are you most proud of and what will you most?
I think what we’ll remember most as a staff is the coaches that have coached with me are my best friends. Us being able to spend time together and work toward goals that we set out for our kids and our players. The times at practice, just being with the boys, the bus rides. There’s plenty of on the field and big game memories, but I think the overwhelming thing that we’ll take away is the relationships with the kids and helping them reach their goals or work toward their goals. Then, just the relationships between our staff and the friendships that we’ve had, not only on our staff, but with other coaches around the state. I’ve been fortunate enough to coach against and become friends with a lot of people through lacrosse. Mt. Hebron has been great to us and our family. I’m grateful for the first principal that hired me, Scott Ruehl and then my current athletic director Brian Rau and Katie Marks. Their support has always been tremendous for us. It’s always about the relationships, 100%. We worked hard to win, that was always a priority. But, trying to help parents steer their young men in the right direction to make their lives better, that was always at the top of our lists of priorities when coaching.”
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