NEWS OF THE WEIRD

Wait, How Many?

And you thought your glovebox full of unpaid parking tickets was impressive. Police detectives and patrol officers arrested Ahyoka Keith, aka Carol Ann Sumner, on Feb. 16, two weeks after she was charged with an astonishing 322 felonies and 327 misdemeanors by the Spring Township police department in Bellefonte, Pennsylvania. Keith is an over-the-road trucker, and her 649 warrants were related to the theft of thousands of dollars from a relative.

Not Getting It

A 42-year-old resident of Ajax, Ontario, was arrested and charged with impaired driving on Feb. 20 at the Durham Regional police station, where he had driven to complain … about his arrest for public intoxication from earlier that morning. The man asked to speak with a supervisor when he arrived at the station, but officers noticed he seemed to be intoxicated, and, after confirming he had driven himself, issued a breathalyzer test, which the man failed. His license was suspended and his vehicle was impounded.

Need for Speed

The Hockenheimring racetrack in Baden-Wurttemberg, Germany, was the setting for a Guinness World Record-setting run recently. The speed reached — 92.24 mph — might not sound so impressive, but Fulda University engineering student Marcel Paul attained that velocity in a toy car. Paul spent 10 months modifying the miniature Porsche with the goal of beating the 88 mph made famous by the time-traveling DeLorean DMC-12 in the “Back to the Future” movies, and in the process created the world’s fasted ride-on toy car. Said one user in the comments on Paul’s Instagram video of the milestone event: “Hell no that looks dangerous.”

Bleepin’ Birds

Eight potty-mouthed parrots are set to rejoin the rest of their flock at the Lincolnshire Wildlife Park in Boston, United Kingdom, after zoo officials decided that recent efforts to help the dirty birds clean up their act in isolation had shown promise. Steve Nichols, who serves as chief executive of the park, still isn’t sure what will happen when the birds are reunited with their more well-behaved peers. “We could end up with 100 swearing parrots on our hands,” Nichols said. “Only time will tell.” For now, the park does not plan to take down its signs warning visitors of the potential for foul language.

Very Senior Year

It’s never too late to graduate, and Fred Allen Smalls of Georgetown, South Carolina, is proof. Smalls took the stage at Georgetown High School on Feb. 4, the day before his 106th birthday, to receive an honorary diploma at a ceremony that came to fruition largely due to the efforts of his granddaughter. Smalls completed eighth grade in the 1930s and moved to Washington, D.C., where he worked as a janitor and held several other jobs before beginning a career with the District of Columbia, eventually retiring during the John F. Kennedy administration. WPDE ABC 15 reported that the diploma was “something he’s wished for most of his life.” The first time Smalls made recent news: In 2023, ABC News recognized him as the oldest Philadelphia Eagles fan. ABC 15

Sticky Situation

A coyote that found itself in an ironic predicament in mid-January has the Humane Animal Welfare Society and the Wildlife in Need Center of Waukesha County, Wisconsin, to thank for its rescue. WDJT in Milwaukee reported that the coyote had gotten its head stuck inside a hollow statue of St. Francis of Assisi, the patron saint of animals, while chasing a rabbit. The coyote was spotted dragging the statue and working to free itself. HAWS located the coyote and transported it to WINC, where it was freed and given the nickname “Frannie.”

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