The ridiculous stats of Erling Haaland: As many Premier League hat-tricks as Wayne Rooney

We started to collate the astonishing stats that made Erling Haaland’s start to life in the Premier League utterly extraordinary a long time ago. Even now that he’s been exposed as a massive League Two-level fraud, he was still the first player this season to reach 20 Premier League goals and is sure to retain his Golden Boot.

* Haaland has become the first Premier League player in history about whom formerly-good football website Football365.com has started doing a Ridiculous Stats piece and then realised to their horror is going to have to be updated enormously often.

* Haaland became the quickest player to 50 Premier League goals, taking just 48 matches to hit the half-century. Andy Cole took 65 games; Alan Shearer needed 66 games; Ruud van Nistelrooy hit his first 50 in 68 matches; while Mo Salah and Fernando Torres each required 72 appearances.

* No player had ever scored the first two goals of a Premier League season before Haaland managed it against Burnley .

* Haaland has scored exactly two goals on the first matchday of his last four league seasons.

* Haaland has scored against all 23 opponents he has faced in the Premier League, the most recent being Ipswich.

* Erling Haaland broke the record for most goals in a single Premier League season in his debut campaign for Manchester City, scoring 36 goals in his 35 appearances, to beat Andy Cole and Alan Shearer (who both set the record in 42-game campaigns).

* No player has scored more goals in an English top-flight league season than Haaland’s 36 in 2022/23 since Ron Davies netted 37 times for Southampton in 1966/67.

* Haaland broke the record for most goals in one season in all competitions by a Premier League player (52), comfortably surpassing Mo Salah in 2017/18 and Ruud van Nistelrooy in 2002/03 (both 44).

* The only player in the history of top-flight English football to score more goals in all competitions in a single season than Haaland’s 52 in 2022/23 is Dixie Dean (63 for Everton in 1927/28).

* Haaland has scored 67 Premier League goals – more than the career totals of Anthony Martial, Alexis Sanchez, David Beckham, Yaya Toure, Robert Pires, Stan Collymore, David Silva, Gianfranco Zola, Clint Dempsey, Tim Cahill, Eidur Gudjohnsen, John Hartson, James Milner, James Ward-Prowse, Andy Carroll, Damien Duff, Christian Eriksen, Kanu, Gus Poyet, Gareth Bale, Diego Costa, Javier Hernandez, Juan Mata, Darius Vassell, Dele Alli, Dirk Kuyt, Edin Dzeko, Cesc Fabregas, Paulo Wanchope, Nolberto Solano, Freddie Ljungberg, Bruno Fernandes, Philippe Coutinho, Paul Merson, Gary McAllister, Nobby Solano, Ashley Young, Ilkay Gundogan, Willian, Juan Pablo Angel, Shola Ameobi, Demba Ba, Willian, Freddie Kanoute, Ashley Barnes, Kelechi Iheanacho, Steve McManaman, Steffen Iversen, Raul Jimenez, Kenwyne Jones, John Carew, Tore Andre Flo, Darren Huckerby, Aleksandar Mitrovic, Dean Sturridge, Darren Anderton, Papiss Cisse, Benni McCarthy, Kevin Doyle, Peter Odemwingie, Salomon Kalou, Paul Dickov, Florent Malouda, Jordan Henderson, Adam Lallana, Mesut Ozil, Jurgen Klinsmann, Nicky Butt, Juninho, Jesse Lingard, Savo Milosevic, Paul Rideout, Paul Pogba, Tammy Abraham, Nani, Victor Anichebe, Benjani, Roque Santa Cruz, Marcus Stewart, Mick Quinn, Stephane Sessegnon, Lomano Lua Lua, Tony Yeboah, Andrey Arshavin, Xherdan Shaqiri, Divock Origi, Mario Balotelli, Patrick Bamford, David Ginola, Michael Ricketts, Gianluca Vialli, Zlatan Ibrahimovic, Michael Ballack, Erik Lamela, Alvaro Morata, Jose Antonio Reyes, Michy Batshuayi, Arjen Robben, Joe Allen, Fabio Borini, Demarai Gray, Odion Ighalo, Alex Iwobi, Robinho, Kai Havertz, Andre Schurrle, Luka Modric, David Platt, Gareth Southgate, Henrikh Mkhitaryan, Edinson Cavani, Mousa Dembele, Samuel Eto’o, Dimitri Payet, Ademola Lookman, Harry Maguire, Emmanuel Petit, Granit Xhaka, Daniel Amokachi, Diego Forlan, Serhiy Rebrov, Andriy Shevchenko, Ronnie Rosenthal, Peter Beagrie, Gavin Peacock, Timo Werner, Jack Grealish, Luis Garcia and Alf-Inge Haaland.

* Haaland has also scored more Premier League goals than six Premier League clubs: Cardiff (66), Blackpool (55), Huddersfield Town (50), Luton (49), Swindon (47) and Barnsley (37).

* Haaland has more Premier League goals (67) than Premier League starts (64).

* Haaland scored more Premier League goals than Everton and Wolves in his debut season.

* By scoring nine goals in his first five Premier League games, Haaland finally knocked Micky Quinn’s name out of the record books. The former Coventry forward jointly held the previous record for most goals in his first five Premier League games with eight in the year football was invented. Sergio Aguero matched that in 2011/12.

* Haaland is already one of only six players to score back-to-back Premier League hat-tricks , but hasn’t yet matched Harry Kane in this particular field of excellence. Kane has not only done it twice, but did so in the same year (if not the same season) after scoring seven goals across the final two games of 2016/17 against Leicester and Hull before netting hat-tricks in successive games against Burnley and Southampton either side of Christmas Day seven months later. Hard as it is to credit, incidentally, that Boxing Day treble against Southampton in 2017 is Kane’s most recent Premier League hat-trick and will now remain so for quite some time.

* Haaland has scored seven Premier League hat-tricks – more than the career totals of Luis Suarez, Dimitar Berbatov, Andy Cole, Ruud van Nistelrooy, Robin van Persie, Raheem Sterling, Ian Wright, Jermain Defoe, Les Ferdinand, Heung-min Son, Matt Le Tissier, Mo Salah, Teddy Sheringham, Chris Sutton, Carlos Tevez, Fernando Torres, Dwight Yorke, Emmanuel Adebayor, Nicolas Anelka, Didier Drogba, Frank Lampard, Romelu Lukaku, Cristiano Ronaldo, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, Jamie Vardy, Gareth Bale, Roberto Firmino, Sadio Mane, Christian Benteke and Eden Hazard. He is now level with, deep breath, Yakubu, Kevin Campbell, Jermain Defoe, Les Ferdinand, Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink, Matt Le Tissier, Mohamed Salah, Teddy Sheringham, Chris Sutton, Carlos Tevez, Fernando Torres and Dwight Yorke.

* Indeed, only six players have ever scored more Premier League hat-tricks than Haaland, and they were all quite handy: Sergio Aguero, Alan Shearer, Robbie Fowler, Thierry Henry, Harry Kane and Michael Owen. He is level with Wayne Rooney.

* Haaland scored his seventh Premier League hat-trick in his 68th game. Shearer (119th) was next best, followed by Kane (134th), Fowler (175th), Owen (185th), Aguero (200th), Henry (220th) and Rooney (472nd).

* Four Premier League hat-tricks in a single season (2022/23) is more than any player has managed bar Alan Shearer, who scored five for Blackburn in 1995/96.

* Haaland has surpassed Dion Dublin’s three Premier League hat-tricks. But how many episodes of Homes Under the Hammer has Haaland presented? Exactly.

* Haaland’s seven hat-tricks have taken Norway fifth above Spain on the list of countries to have produced the most Premier League trebles with 17, Haaland standing on the shoulders of such giants as Solskjaer, Steffen Iversen and Joshua King (two each), John Carew, Tore Andre Flo and Jan Age Fjortoft (one each). Argentina, France and Holland are joint-second with 18, which frankly shouldn’t take too long to topple, but even Haaland will have to hang around a few years to knock England’s 170 hat-tricks off top spot.

* Haaland is the first player in the Premier League to score hat-tricks in three successive home games, and was the first Manchester City player to score a Manchester derby hat-trick since 1970 before Phil Foden almost immediately joined him.

* Haaland is unsurprisingly the quickest player ever to reach three Premier League hat-tricks after getting there in eight(!) games. The previous record holder was Michael Owen, who managed it in a sluggish 48 games. Next best are Ruud van Nistelrooy (59 games), Fernando Torres (64) and Andy Cole (65).

* Haaland is also by definition the quickest player ever to reach four Premier League hat-tricks after getting there in 19(!) games. The previous record holder was Ruud van Nistelrooy, who managed it in a laborious 65 games. Next best are Luis Suarez (81), Alan Shearer (86) and Robbie Fowler (89).

* Haaland was the fastest player to ever score 25 goals under Pep Guardiola, doing so in 20 games to beat Lionel Messi (28), Samuel Eto’o (30), Sergio Aguero (35) and Thierry Henry (41).

* No player has ever scored more goals in a season for Manchester City than Haaland. Tommy Johnson’s mark of 38 goals stood since 1929 before Haaland broke it by mid-March of his debut campaign.

* Haaland was both the fastest and youngest player to reach 20 Champions League goals, obliterating Harry Kane’s really quite impressive previous benchmark of 24 games by 10 when reaching the landmark in just 14 games for Salzburg and Dortmund. At 20 years and 231 days old, Haaland was over a year younger than previous record-holder Kylian Mbappe as the youngest player to reach 20 Champions League goals.

* Haaland was also the fastest and youngest player to reach 30 Champions League goals, reaching the mark in 25 games and thus shattering Ruud van Nistelrooy’s previous 34-match haul, while beating Kylian Mbappe by 116 days.

* Haaland was indeed also both the fastest and youngest player to reach 40 Champions League goals.

* Only Lionel Messi, Cristiano Ronaldo (both 8), Robert Lewandowski (6), Karim Benzema (4), Mario Gomez, Filippo Inzaghi, Luiz Adriano and Neymar (3) have scored more career Champions League hat-tricks than Haaland’s two.

* Only 19 players have ever scored more European Cup goals than Haaland. In the Champions League, that number is reduced to just 17.

* Haaland has more European Cup goals than Ferenc Puskas, Edinson Cavani, Gerd Muller, Fernando Morientes, Arjen Robben, Samuel Eto’o, Paco Gento, Antoine Griezmann, Kaka, Wayne Rooney, Patrick Kluivert, David Trezeguet, Ryan Giggs, Sadio Mane, Rivaldo, Luis Suarez and a couple of others.

* Haaland scored 12 goals in Manchester City’s 2022/23 Champions League campaign to claim the competition’s Golden Boot for the second time. Only 12 players have ever finished multiple European Cup seasons as top scorer – and just Ronaldo, Messi, Van Nistelrooy, Raul and Andriy Shevchenko have done it in the Champions League era.

* Haaland has only played 17 games in the Champions League knockout stages but just 11 players have more goals in such matches.

* Haaland has more Champions League knockout stage goals (14) than Neymar (13) managed in 32 games.

* Haaland has more Champions League knockout stage goals than Neymar, Luis Suarez, Thierry Henry, Kaka, Zlatan Ibrahimovic, Fernando Torres, Samuel Eto’o and Mo Salah.

* Haaland and Lionel Messi are the only players to score a first-half hat-trick in a Champions League knockout game.

* Haaland, Messi and Luiz Adriano are the only players to score five goals in a Champions League game.

* After just 31 caps, Haaland is second on the list of leading goalscorers for the Norway men’s national team with 27 goals and needs just seven more to overhaul Jorgen Juve’s benchmark of 33 which has stood since before World War Two.

* Haaland is the first player to score five goals in a single Champions League match and a single FA Cup match.

* With his five-goal FA Cup haul against Luton, Haaland also became the first player to score five or more goals in a single game for Manchester City twice, the first Manchester City player to score five or more goals in an FA Cup match since Frank Roberts did so in 1926, the first Manchester City player to score seven goals in their first five FA Cup appearances, and the first player to score five or more goals in an FA Cup game against a top-flight club since George Best’s six against Northampton in 1970.

Erling Haaland honours
Austrian Bundesliga: 2018/19, 2019/20
DFB-Pokal: 2020/21
Bundesliga Player of the Season: 2020/21
Bundesliga Player of the Month: January 2020, November 2020, April 2021, August 2021
Bundesliga Team of the Season: 2020/21, 2021/22
UEFA Champions League Squad of the Season: 2020/21
UEFA Champions League Forward of the Season: 2020/21
UEFA Champions League Top Goalscorer: 2020/21
UEFA Nations League Top Goalscorer: 2020/21
FIFA FIFPro World 11: 2021
Premier League Player of the Month: August 2022, April 2023
Premier League: 2022/23, 2023/24
FA Cup: 2022/23
Champions League: 2022/23
Super Cup: 2023
Community Shield: 2024
European Golden Shot: 2022/23
Premier League Golden Boot: 2022/23
Premier League Player of the Year: 2022/23
Premier League Young Player of the Year: 2022/23
Gerd Muller Trophy (Striker of the Year award, or the ‘sorry you didn’t win the Ballon d’Or’ trophy): 2023

Erling Haaland top-flight league goals record
Molde (Eliteserien) 2017-2018: 39 games, 14 goals

Red Bull Salzburg (Austrian Bundesliga) 2018-2020: 16 games, 17 goals

Borussia Dortmund (Bundesliga) 2020-22: 67 games, 62 goals

Manchester City (Premier League) 2022-24: 68 games, 67 goals

Total: 186 games, 158 goals

Erling Haaland Champions League record
Red Bull Salzburg 2019-20: 6 games, 8 goals

Borussia Dortmund 2019-22: 13 games, 15 goals

Manchester City 2022-24: 20 games, 18 goals

Total: 39 games, 41 goals

Erling Haaland international record
Norway 2019-24: 33 games, 31 goals