10 Weird Laws in Raleigh

Not only is Raleigh "the City of Oaks" but it's also the city of weird laws.(NCDOTcommunications/Flickr)

Raleigh, NC — I've always wanted to visit North Carolina's capital city, renowned for great colleges and the famed "Research Triangle." Before visiting any new city, however, I usually familiarize myself with its basic laws.

In Raleigh, it's illegal to sing off-key. This law left me scratching my head while wondering: No wonder Tony Soprano got in treble and arrested in Raleigh!

In short, because the word weird is synonymous with "uncommon," here are ten weird laws in Raleigh.

1. It's illegal to stay in the same hotel room, unless you're married.

• Hypothetical scenario:

In the wee hours of the morning, a man tiptoes into a hotel room. Like a ninja, he slides in bed. His girlfriend wakes up.

"Mikey," she yells, "I've been calling you for hours! Where have you—"

Mikey hops out of bed and storms toward the door. "Let's chat tomorrow, babe. I just remembered staying here tonight would be illegal."

2. Happy Hour drinks are against the law.

• Hypothetical scenario:

A party of five celebrates Lisa's birthday. One of the guests asks the birthday girl how she feels.

"I'm so happy," Lisa says, taking a sip from her drink.

An angry security guard storms over to the table. "Ma'am, I know it's your birthday, but please don't drink while announcing you're happy at a certain hour. It's illegal!"

3. It's illegal to steal kitchen Grease.

• Hypothetical scenario:

Once upon a time . . . Jack told Jill she can borrow a DVD. So Jill grabbed the DVD Grease from the kitchen countertop. Unfortunately, Jack never told his roommate — Dave — that he'd loaned Dave's favorite movie to Jill.

Dave reported Jill's crime of "stealing kitchen Grease."

The End.

Perhaps no movie is riskier to borrow than "Grease."(A.Currell/Flickr)

4. It's against the law to rollerblade on state highways.

• Hypothetical scenario:

A security guard spots some guy rollerblading down Highway 540. He blows a whistle and yells: "Sir, that's illegal what you're doing!"

The guy shakes his head. "Nope! I'm not rollerblading . . . I'm merely ice-skating on concrete."

5. It's illegal to serve alcohol at a Bingo game.

• Hypothetical scenario:

During a Bingo game, one of the players says: "Hey, anybody got some alcohol? I cut my finger a few minutes ago."

The host shakes her head. "Sorry, pal, but serving alcohol at a Bingo game is against the law!"

6. It's illegal to operate as a professional psychic.

• Hypothetical scenario:

(Phone rings.) "Operator speaking, may I help you?"

The caller says: "I'm witnessing another meteorologist give Raleigh's weekly forecast . . ." He holds the phone to his chest, yelling at the TV. "So arrest these weather-psychics!"

7. If an unmarried couple goes to a hotel and registers themselves as married, then according to state law — they're married.

• Hypothetical scenario:

"Hey Woody," a guy says, "how come you look so sad? What's wrong?"

Woody sighs. "Bro, getting married put me in debt. That wedding cost more than I earned all year!"

His friend smiles. "Well, should've done as I did. I booked a hotel. Then I registered Julia and me as married. And so, according to the law — we got married on the spot! Oh, and the hotel was cheap."

This guy is trying to convince her how much that cheap hotel resembles a wedding chapel.(Pradipta/Pixahive)

8. Sniffing glue is illegal.

• Hypothetical scenario:

A powerful lawmaker, with poor eyesight, asks her husband to pass her the lipstick. But he accidentally passes her the glue stick.

Weeks later, the powerful lawmaker bans everything related to glue being near a human face.

The End.

9. Driving on sidewalks is illegal.

• Hypothetical scenario:

A park ranger warns a group of teenagers about driving on the park's sidewalks.

"Oh, sorry," one of the teens says. "Next time I'll drive on the grass. Thanks for the tip."

10. It's illegal for organizations to hold meetings when members are in costume.

• Hypothetical scenario:

The Mayor calls a meeting. Officers and firemen show up in uniforms. Doctors and nurses in scrubs.

"This illegal meeting's over!" the Mayor yells in the microphone.