Rachel Cruze: 6 Signs of Financial Infidelity and How To Overcome Them

There have been many battles fought at the front where love meets money. In an ideal partnership, especially one with shared finances, communication about everything from monthly bills to big expenditures would be open and honest.

However, what happens when your spouse is a little less than forthcoming with purchases or has a different opinion of what it means to stick to a budget ?

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Financial infidelity is a term coined to describe when one or both partners in a relationship with shared finances hide, misrepresent or lie about financial information from one another.

Financial coach Rachel Cruze warned that there are six signs of financial infidelity:

1. Hiding a purchase intentionally.
2. Getting cash back without telling your spouse.
3. Having a secret savings account.
4. Stashing bills.
5. Opening secret credit cards or new accounts.
6. Playing the dollar-for-dollar game.

Cruze, an advocate for overcoming money obstacles such as financial infidelity, goes on to address these warning signs and offers solutions to get through them .

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‘Hiding a Purchase Intentionally’

There is no way around that once someone is hiding something, it’s a slippery slope to lying about almost every transaction. This is typically a one-way street toward divorce or other legal proceedings so best to be avoided. Cruze always advises these four ways to nip any infraction in the bud:

• Communicate
• Get on the same page.
• Tell the truth always.
• Get on a budget together to spend without guilt.

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‘Getting Cash Back Without Telling Your Spouse’

It can start small with just getting some cash back from a grocery run, but this omission can snowball into bigger misrepresentations of how you are spending from your joint account.

Cruze would advise that you always tell the truth. If you have slipped up in your communication, she said:

“If you or your spouse has committed financial infidelity, it’s not the end of the world! But you do have to come clean and work together to clean up the mess. There’s hope!”

‘Having a Secret Savings Account’

Starting other accounts without your spouse’s knowledge is a significant breach of trust so you may want to ask yourself why you or your partner would do so.

This could signify bigger problems in a marriage you need to address. Cruze said:

“No matter what scale it’s on, financial infidelity can be tough to deal with. And sometimes, just working out the kinks in your communication and doing a regular budget won’t heal those wounds. If that’s the case, there’s no shame in seeking the help of a professional marriage counselor!”

‘Stashing Bills’

Hiding bills you don’t want to deal with only makes them a much bigger problem in the future for both you and your partner. Communication, as with any financial discourse, is paramount. Cruze advised:

“When you and your spouse aren’t communicating about money, you can both end up feeling guilty about your spending habits, lying about your spending habits or worse… slipping onto financial infidelity.”

‘Opening Secret Credit Cards or New Accounts’

Credit cards are a necessary part of making daily purchases and building a credit history to secure loans. Still, it’s a delicate balance between using them wisely or wracking up debt. Cruze stated:

“One in three people who are married admit to hiding a purchase from their spouse. And 31% of couples say they have a credit card their spouse doesn’t know about.”

‘Playing the Dollar-for-Dollar Game’

If you or your spouse has the mentality of negotiating for every dollar spent, or rather if they spent a certain amount, it automatically means you can spend a certain amount, your finances could go off the rails easily.

Recognizing the warning signs goes a long way to stopping them in there tracks, or as Cruze said:

“Financial infidelity happens when you or your spouse intentionally lie about money. When you deliberately choose not to tell the truth about your spending habits (no matter how big or small), that is financial infidelity.”

This article originally appeared on GOBankingRates.com : Rachel Cruze: 6 Signs of Financial Infidelity and How To Overcome Them