Satire: Living by the Geezer Code

I'm adding to it as I go.

IHop BreakfastPhoto byCartoon by Lambert-King

There are all sports of codes out there. For example, there was the Code of the West. That code involved a certain way of living that involved respect for others and the desire for that respect to be reciprocated. Other groups have their own code of conduct.

For example, doctors, lawyers and accounts all have certain core principles that they allegedly abide by. Well, as a geezer I too have a certain code of conduct with certain tenements that I live by. I’ll share them with you. You may decide to live by them as well. Or not. here we go.

1: Learning is a lifelong project.

I learn something new every day. Sometimes I learn the same new things over and over again. Buy hey, learning is learning.

2: Accountability is a big deal.

No, not that type of accountability, the ability of your accountant to help you with taxes. If you have tax issues life can be miserable.

3: Don’t make excuses.

Find scapegoats instead. Let them make excuses. Making excuses is exhausting. Let somebody else do it. Even if they have nothing to do with the situation.

4: Stay informed but take a break from the “news.”

Generally speaking, the “news” should with a warning. Something like, “Excessive exposure can lead to vomiting and depression.”

5: Pay attention to your physical appearance, but don’t be obsessed with it.

Say I got myself in great shape, what’s the best I could hope for? Maybe people would look at me and say, “He looks great. For his age.” I ‘ve heard people see somebody in their nineties and say, “They look great. For their age.” If they are in their nineties and are above ground, they look great.

6: You can’t have it all.

Especially at the Golden Corral or other buffets. A while back my wife told me I could no longer get my money’s worth at a buffet. She can be cruel at times.

7: Share your talent with those around you.

Unless you’re a mime or play the accordion. Then keep your talent to yourself.

8: Face the world with a smile.

But put your teeth in first. It just works better that way.

9: Pursue what you love.

Unless it’s your neighbor’s wife. Or the target of your affection isn’t interested. And gets a restraining order.

10: Don’t dwell in the past.

But an occasional visit is okay. But when visiting in the past, it’s best to avoid the bad neighborhoods.