5 Ways to Rekindle a Dying Relationship & Why It's Worth Saving

Photo byEnvato Elements Purchased Image License 5HE2C9K3R4

Did Your Relationship Start Dreamy But Then Fizzle Out?

Many do, and things change as the relationship progresses. In the case of Narcissists, they love-bomb, say and do everything you dream of...in the beginning, until you are hooked. Other times, people do not reveal flaws or sometimes even more significant problems until months into the commitment. After the initial lust stage (Honeymoon stage), people often lose interest and realize they may not have had as much in common as they once believed.

So, now what? Often, you have already moved in, have mutual friends, and feel significantly invested.

Why It Is Important To Evaluate What is Happening Before Abandoning Your Old Love

The grass is not greener on the other side. It is greener when you water it. Said another way, what you give attention to in life grows. Isn't love always better than hate? I sure feel better with a loving presence. Hate, bitterness, and contempt create tension in a household where everyone walks on eggshells, and no one feels joy or contentment.

Hopefully, you have not gotten to the point of contempt (the killer of relationships). Still, instead, you are just feeling stuck, spending less time together, and worried about what is happening in the relationship. If you are worried, you still care, and there is hope for rekindling the passion you once had.

If you are debating if your relationship is worth saving ask yourself:

• Does this person inspire and support me or drain me?
• Is this person emotionally intelligent?
• Does this person make me feel safe and secure?
• Do I feel appreciated by this person?
• Is this person emotionally, financially, or physically abusive?

If you answered yes to all but the question of abuse, the relationship is likely worth saving. If this person drains your energy or abuses you, then it is time to formulate a plan to leave. Know your worth and set your boundaries.

"Sometimes two people have to all apart to realize how much they need to fall back together." ~ Author Unknown

Five Steps to Rekindle Your Passion for Each Other

1. Take a look at yourself. Most problems in the relationship stem from a lack of self-love and acceptance of the self, personal insecurities that we project onto our partner, and past unhealed experiences. We must go within and constantly do the self-work, pull our own weeds in our hearts, and continue to grow on a personal level so that we have more to offer our significant other and more energy to do so. Be certain you are not self-sabataging before leaving the relationship.
2. Write down all the reasons you fell in love with this person to begin with. Set aside the reasons you may be starting to fall out of love. List their best qualities and everything you are grateful for about that person. List how they make you feel good, help you, or show appreciation.
3. Reinvest. Yes, it might be time to ante in again. You may need to catch up on your relationship investment and do more again. The stakes are high. Be honest with yourself and take personal responsibility for your part in the fall of the relationship. What would the rest of your life look like without this person? If you could rekindle it, how would that feel?

• Show gratitude and appreciation for your partner.
• Make your partner a priority and clear your calendar for quality time.
• Be affectionate and increase physical intimacy.
• Spice up the passion by flirting with each other and dating one another again.
• Partners who play together stay together. Make time to have fun with each other; life is serious enough.

1. Forgive each other's past mistakes. We are all human. It is essential to talk it through without driving it into the ground so that we avoid repeating the same mistake and continue to frustrate our partner.
2. Ask how you can be more supportive and helpful or what your partner needs from you. This goes a long way because they may have been too afraid to ask.

Final Thoughts

Some great examples of playing together may include:

• Trying a class together
• Playing cards or board games while listening to music. Turn off the telly.
• Have a water balloon toss
• Go bowling or join a league together.
• Visiting an arcade

Giving up on what you have together just because the initial honeymoon phase ran its course is silly. Yes, the beginning stage of dating comes with great excitement and magic. But it is all about the chase.

In the next stage, the early attachment stage, you realize you feel at peace with this person. You want to commit. Then, the crisis stage hits, BAM. The crisis stage is precisely where you are if you are reading this article. This is where you drift apart and need to make a crucial decision to stay or leave.

When you follow my above five tips, the goal is to land in the Deep Attachment stage, which is the calm after the storm. Once you have chosen to stay and commit to strengthening the relationship, you grow together exponentially. You reach a new level of trust, understanding, and respect for each other. You will then realize excitement is overrated and can be created amongst yourselves, but the best part is the emotional safety and contentment you will both feel.

All the bumps are there for a reason. How you navigate them makes all the difference. Slow down and take your time when emotions run high.

Remember, everyone has both a good and bad side. What matters most is how you work together as a couple. You won't necessarily work better with someone else. Running away when things get tough won't get you far.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. I hope your relationship is worth saving.

Peace & Light,

Libby

"We make time for what we love. Pay attention. People will show you your worth to them." ~Joshua Ryan Stewart