Ten Signs of Codependency & How To Overcome It So Others Don't Take Advantage of You

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What is Codependency?

Codependency is any relationship where each partner is psychologically or physically dependent on the other. Any relationship can be codependent, whether family, friends, coworkers, or intimate.

One person, the giver, sacrifices their own needs for the sake of another person, the taker. Codependency is a form of people pleasing, but it's crucial to understand that the taker's behavior often involves manipulation, intending to make the giver feel reliant on them. The taker needs this attention and submissiveness to feel what they think is love. It can be isolating and destroy other important relationships.

Codependency is often created in narcissistic relationships. These can be between siblings, parent/ child, friends, or intimate relationships. I have witnessed it many times. It is very frustrating to witness someone you love fall prey to being codependent. It is very unhealthy.

Signs of Codependency

• The giver makes excuses for the taker
• The giver is self-critical
• The giver feels they need to rescue the taker
• The giver neglects their own needs and desires
• Low self-esteem
• No Boundaries
• Dysfunctional communication
• There is a deep need for external validation and approval
• Avoids conflict
• They feel guilt

Causes

There are several common causes, but many things cause codependency. The known causes include childhood trauma, overprotective parents, and mental health conditions such as depression and low self-esteem. Other causes may consist of financial needs, overwhelm with making decisions, and being involved with a narcissist.

Overcoming Codependency

There are twelve-step programs available because codependency is such a serious problem that robs us of our self-efficacy. But here are a few things you can implement to help overcome codependency:

• Focus on self care and personal needs and desires. Do not hesitate to say no when you do not feel like doing something.
• Engage in hobbies that you enjoy.
• Set and enforce personal boundaries. Do not let the taker manipulate you.
• Stand up for yourself in conflicts and understand your self-worth.
• Build self-esteem. A coach can be a great advocate and aid in this process with tools you can use for a lifetime.

Final Thoughts

Strive for interdependence, where you maintain autonomy while relying on each other equally. You are stronger than you know and able to do most things independently. Often, the taker is emotionally blackmailing the giver. Raise awareness and stand your ground.

Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. I appreciate you.

Peace & Light,

Libby