Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez’s Split Turns Nasty! ‘They Only Talk Through Lawyers’

What was meant to be a happy occasion was marred by a mortifying coincidence. On July 24, Jennifer Lopez turned 55 and celebrated alongside friends in New York. Husband Ben Affleck didn’t attend — just like he skipped marking their two-year wedding anniversary a week earlier. Instead, the actor-director purchased a new $20.5 million home in L.A., with reports confirming he closed escrow on the five-bedroom property on his wife’s birthday.

It’s just another bad sign for their crumbling relationship. First came whispers of problems this spring. Then Ben, 52, and J. Lo listed their Beverly Hills marital home for $68 million after he moved into a rental. A decision to take even more time apart soon followed. Now, after largely living separate lives on opposite coasts all summer, an insider exclusively confirms Ben and J. Lo’s split has taken a nasty new turn.

“A few weeks ago, something shifted,” says the insider. “Ben got colder and he’s since ghosted her. They only talk through lawyers at this point, and J. Lo’s finding it humiliating.”

She’d already been embarrassed enough when the world initially learned her fourth marriage — to the man she’s called “the love of my life” and “the best friend I ever had” — was failing 20 years after they broke up the first time. “Jennifer thinks Ben’s being an insensitive brat and wants him to man up, quit the brutal mind games and treat her with more respect,” says the insider. “She’s not going to take being treated so poorly anymore. J. Lo’s ready to fight — this means war.”

How Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez Got Here

By the time fans knew anything was wrong, J. Lo and Ben’s romance had already been through the ringer . They secretly faced an “excruciatingly difficult” period, says a second source, confirming there were “screaming matches” and “panicked, middle-of- the-night phone calls to crisis managers” as the couple debated how to move forward.

There were questions about J. Lo’s decision to launch a booze brand, Delola, last year, considering Ben is a recovering alcoholic. Their disparate feelings about public notoriety — Ben recently called J. Lo’s level of fame “f--kin’ bananas” while confirming how much he dislikes “a lot of attention” — fueled problems.

So did her decision to release three projects in February — an album, a movie and a documentary — about getting a second chance at happiness with Ben. The Oscar winner admitted in the doc that they’d been trying to find common ground, confessing, “We’re just two people with different kinds of approaches [to privacy] trying to learn to compromise.”

The singer-actress played it cool for months. “J. Lo feels she’s kept her side of the street clean with the way she’s handled this situation,” explains the insider. “She found it very difficult to accept in the beginning, but when Ben requested space, she gave it to him with zero trash talking or game playing.”

Ben, adds the insider, “seemed to share J. Lo’s view that they needed to put on a united front while being respectful toward each other, even from afar.”

Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez Playing the Blame Game

But things have changed as more time has passed. Their rings have been on and off in recent weeks, and on August 1, J. Lo stepped out in NYC after moving Ben’s green diamond engagement ring to her right hand.

“The way Ben ignored their anniversary, then her birthday , while having the audacity to claim he’s protecting her somehow and taking time out of sensitivity to her feelings? It makes J. Lo sick to her stomach,” says the insider, adding that “a lot of people in her world believe he’s gaslighting her.”

That’s not how Ben sees it. “He insists he’s done his best to be reasonable,” claims the insider. “He gives the impression she’s been dragging her heels and thought he’d eventually give things another shot. It’s been very difficult trying to formalize a divorce with someone who can’t come to grips with cold reality .”

It didn’t have to be this way. “People in their circle are wondering how it’s gotten to this point and become so toxic,” laments the insider. There’s still a lot to wrap up and a fortune at stake — J. Lo’s worth an estimated $400 million while Ben’s worth about $150 million — with their $68 million mansion remaining unsold.

“Even the lawyers involved are finding it daunting to be stuck in the middle of their fighting,” adds the insider, noting rumors have circulated that the legal teams are too scared “to convey messages back and forth” as the latest drama plays out.

Friends just hope Ben and J. Lo can find peace amid the emotional warfare. “They are two very different people with polar- opposite ideologies,” says the insider. “And they both deserve to get on with their lives.”