My mother-in-law whines about sharing her birthday with her grandson.

Photo byMosoianu BogdanonUnsplash

My relationship with my mother-in-law has significantly deteriorated over the years. Initially, we had a cordial relationship, but as time passed, she has become someone who always feels slighted by every situation.

If I have to cancel a family gathering on my husband’s side of the family due to a funeral or other urgent matters, she would put the blame on me. If I am unable to fulfill my mother-in-law’s demands to take her somewhere or buy something for her, I am once again at fault. Even if I couldn’t control the fact that my oldest son was born on my mother-in-law’s birthday, she still blames me. If I don’t disclose every bit of information she seeks, she assumes that I’m hiding something or being deceitful.

To cut a long story short, I’ve always had the feeling that she’s trying to make every situation about herself. Recently, we resumed communication after several months of no contact, but I still feel hesitant to interact with her because I don’t believe she has changed. My husband now takes the kids to see her once every two weeks, but I don’t communicate with her directly.

One day, my mother-in-law asked my husband about his plans for her birthday. He reminded her that it was also our son’s birthday, and he informed me that she seemed genuinely surprised and had forgotten. He told her that we had already made plans for our son’s birthday but would visit her in the afternoon.

My mother-in-law then suggested that my husband spend the weekend at her house because she was planning to celebrate both Saturday and Sunday. On Saturday, she was having her regular friends over, and on Sunday, she was having her church friends over and wanted to introduce them to my husband. She then said that it was adults-only, and the kids or I couldn’t come, so we should plan something for our son on another day. But she added that if it were during the week, she couldn’t make it.

My husband declined her offer, and at that moment, he took the kids and left. Since then, she has been texting him repeatedly, trying to convince him to change his mind. When he refuses, she then texts me, asking me to help persuade him to come, saying that it’s her big day, and she’s crying because he won’t share it with her. I haven’t responded to her messages; instead, I show them to my husband, who just shakes his head in disbelief.

This woman is driving me insane, and I wonder how I haven’t lost my mind yet, considering how she makes everything about herself or causes a commotion if she doesn’t get her way.