My husband is on the verge of leaving me

Photo byNiels And MarcoonUnsplash

My spouse’s feelings have been deeply soured. We have a nearly three-year-old and a one-year-old. My husband and three-year-old son have always had a strained relationship. My spouse has suspected that our child dislikes him since he was about 6 weeks old. As our first child, he was always drawn to me (mother). Every time a youngster would most likely come to him, the child would cry. It shattered my spouse to the point where he believed the infant disliked him. Their relationship improved as the baby grew older, and they were able to connect and play more effectively. Nonetheless, we relocated near to the family when the baby was 15 months old.

My family is not good with children. We don’t usually leave our kids with my mom or sister unless we have to, but when we do, all they do is give him whatever he wants. He is not subject to any rules or limitations. They constantly feed him everything he wants. Allows him to watch TV, stay up as late as he wants, and do almost everything he wants. So when he comes back home with us, he tries to avoid doing the same thing, and my husband can’t bear it. My spouse comes from a typical household, and I came from genuinely stressful childhood years without a father, ever before, raised largely by my grandmother and also slightly by my mother. As a result, I’ve had to work through my own issues in order to parent our child in the way that my partner desires, which is fair. I’ve gotten to the point where I don’t let our young boy press over me, but I try to see the middle ground, such as “maybe he’s acting out because he wants even more attention” or whatever.

My partner’s feelings are legitimately hurt when our son says things like “daddy ls indicate” “father’s no excellent” “I do not like father.” I try to convince my husband that he’s only claiming so for focus and that he does not suggest it. I attempt to explain to my child that it hurts daddy’s feelings and that we shouldn’t say things like that because we know it’s not true and Daddy loves him a lot. My husband is the stay-at-home dad, and I work. Our one-year-old is very different, and neither my husband nor I have any concerns with him. It’s primarily because of our almost three-year-old and hubby’s collaboration. I’m not sure what else we can do.

I am NOT suggesting that my toddler’s behaviours are inherited from my mother or sibling. I’m stating that there is a pattern of his going over by them, doing absolutely anything he wants, and then returning and attempting to do the same thing that we don’t allow. I know that my child’s routines are usual for a young child and were consistent when he was a baby because I nursed him until he was 16 months old.

The distinction in parenting is that I attempt to redirect my young children’s behavior as well as see past the front and also see what my child is truly claiming he requires, such as he’s doing XYZ because he desires interest and also for that reason I offer him interest, whereas my other half sees that as rewarding the “poor” behavior.

My husband is a sensitive male (no one bats an eye at a sensitive female), and I’ve seen that he takes our small children’s acts personally even when they aren’t. He does require counseling to break the connection he has formed in his head.