Satire: Casino Ads Take an Interesting Turn

As do other ads.

CasinoPhoto byKvngaonUnsplash

I’m not a gambler. I’ve heard the stories of co-workers who have gone to a casino and will then talk about how they’ve won various amounts of money. For example, I had a boss that said she won something like $1,500. But she never talked about how much she lost while trying to win. And that’s how casinos advertise.

Got money problems? Come on down to One-Armed- Bandit Casino!

A recent casino ad I heard on the radio said that if you were in debt, you should come on down to their casino so you can gamble yourself out of debt. What a great idea! I wonder why more financial experts don’t recommend that? Is that what E F Hutton tells his clients? Does he get more specific and say stuff like, “Go all in on red?”

It’s sort of like the car dealer who asks he you are upside down in your car. He then says he can get you out of that situation. And he can. By getting you even more upside down in a new car. But I digress.

Some sports betting touts talk about opportunities instead of bets. A person who thinks a wager is a business opportunity is the type of person who thinks a paid escort is a date.

The ads for sports betting generally have a disclaimer saying to gamble responsibly and if you have a problem get help. Sort of like after telling a guy after his “date” with an escort, go to the free clinic and get checked out.

And after taking care of your financial woes, find yourself a classy lady?

“And where can I find a classy lady in OKC?’ you ask. Well, at The Extended Pinkie Gentlemen’s Club. I did change the name, but the ad itself contained some interesting premises.

The ad did say their club was where OKC’s classiest ladies could be found. That’s right, OKC’s classiest ladies can be seen swinging naked on poles in clubs. With their pinkie fingers extended. Obviously OKC must be a cultural mecca.

Plus, what do the less refined ladies in OKC do?

And then, on to your taxes.

Getting ready to do your taxes? A radio ad for a tax prep company that said taxes were their obsession. They must be fascinating people to be around.

But they will probably tell you not to forget to claim all that income you made at the casino. BTW, is money made by gambling actually, “earned income?”