OPINION: On the topic of old brains

Let’s see, what was I going to write about?

Oh yes: brains.

Ever go to the refrigerator, open the door and “forget” what you are there for? If you haven’t, you may still have “issues,” so read on.

Especially now that Resolution season is upon us, I thought it might be appropriate to submit a primer on the brain — particularly the old brain — which can thwart the best of intentions. Not to burst your bubble, I don’t like your chances.

Almost all the brain is located in the head. The exception is a small amount in the pelvic area. This analysis deals entirely with the head.

In addition to managing the senses, the brain serves as repository of the past separated by a thin membrane from a relatively teensy, weensy outer part that engages the present. Now, stay with me on this … as we age, with the processing of experience over a lifetime, the vault becomes crowded. Some of the finer details remain randomly clear while others become murky, vulnerable to embellishment. Memory may become more fanciful than factual, more pasteurized and homogenized than the original input. At the very least, inconsistent.

Making matters worse, the membrane that separates the present from the inner vault becomes porous with age, no longer able to process all the incoming in real time. A leak-prone “now” brain can quickly draw a blank, grasping at stored data to override the deficiency. That is helpful or hurtful depending on the circumstances. For example, you may not know why you are standing at the refrigerator with the door open but remember vividly your high school prom date. Nor does the “now” brain multi-task like in the old days. You might take 15 or 20 minutes (or more!) to run the microwave, make toast and blend a smoothie, instead of doing all three simultaneously in two minutes. Seems the aging brain wants to handle only one “insignificance” at a time. Sequence takes over efficiency.

Side note: If this is a recurring theme, do not open the refrigerator door until confirming the reason for being there! Short of maintaining a checklist pinned to the door by a Las Vegas souvenir magnet, you can mumble the mission out loud (in this case, say it is milk!”) before starting toward the refrigerator, trusting you can still remember it by the time you arrive. It’s not a sure thing, but it’s worked for me. Me! … who has been known to leave the milk out after use — on the wrong side of the door.

Are you still with me?

General Rule: to prevent forget-age, struggling with a name or word, or why you are drawing a blank in front of the refrigerator, etc., willful thinking at the surface level may not help. It’s in there, probably on the other side of the membrane. Use a diversion. Turn off all forced mental engines and go about life. Trust that fully distracted, the blockage will clear and the memory returned to you (re-cross the membrane), usually with frosting on it. It doesn’t have to be a prolonged absence — just a lap around the kitchen island or block, but not so far that “it” (not you) gets lost again by the time you get back. Meanwhile, close the refrigerator door! If I took my own advice, I wouldn’t have nearly the problems I have now with the freezer.

Now looky here: I’ve used up my words and haven’t even gotten to Resolutions.

To be continued…