Christina Applegate, 52, Says She ‘Doesn’t Look In Mirrors’ as She Battles Body Dysmorphia and Long-Time Self Esteem Issues While Living With MS

Christina Applegate's Struggle With Body Image

• Christina Applegate, who has been battling multiple sclerosis (MS), a disease which impacts the central nervous system, for years, has admitted on a recent episode of her podcast that she “doesn’t look in mirrors” as she’s long coped with body insecurity.
• Applegate, 52, was diagnosed with MS in August 2021 — but she admitted that her body image issues began way before that as she struggled with an eating disorder during the early years of her acting career.
• There is no cure for MS, but MS warriors battling the disease do have methods to manage their symptoms.
• Applegate has spoken about how she continues to cope with the “demon” of low self esteem, but is speaking up so future generations, including her daughter, don’t have to go through the same struggles.

Actress Christina Applegate, who has been battling multiple sclerosis (MS), an incurable disease, for years, has admitted she "doesn't look in mirrors" when she's at home as she's long coped with body insecurity, something she recalls starting when she was a child. Applegate has been living with MS, a disease which impacts the central nervous system, since August 2021, a diagnosis that came more than a decade after she dealt with breast cancer in 2008. RELATED: Multiple Sclerosis (MS): Inspiring Stories from SNTV The mom of one opened up about her experience with an eating disorder on the most recent episode of "MeSsy With Christina Applegate & Jamie-Lynn Sigler," titled "Body Talk." Speaking on MeSsy , Applegate said, "I've never discussed it in public ever ... my battle with an eating disorder. Never. So, it's a big deal. That's why I really wanted to do this today because that demon in my head is coming back really loud and it's scaring me. "It hasn't been there for a long time. I mean, it's always a little bit there, you know, when you've lived with anorexia for as long as I did in my early life. It always plagues me. And then body dysmorphia and all of those things. They are still always there." In an effort to keep herself strong and confident amid MS and her inner insecurity "demon," Applegate explained to Sigler, "I don't look in mirrors and this is obviously something that people don't know. I have writing all over my mirrors in my bathroom so I don't look at them, because I will fall on the ground and cry. "And that's how I feel now. That is today. This isn't 20-something year old Christina. That is the girl who gained 45 pounds when she got ... I almost said when I got nominated with MS ... What's the word I'm thinking of? Diagnosed."

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As for her earliest memories of insecurities, Applegate recounted being "a little girl" and sitting on the floor when a young boy, her next-door neighbor, touched her thigh and said "you're fat." She explained further, "Now, mind you I was far from that, but that stuck with me. I mean, obviously, I'm 52 years old. I was maybe 8 or 9 years old and the word fat was brought into my vocabulary." Applegate also pointed out that growing up, her mom was "obsessed with her weight," put her in Weight Watchers when she was 15, and acted like their weight loss journey was a competition. "She was always competitive, if I got down to 110 and I mean that's a low number for someone my height, she'd be like 'oh, I'm so mad ... how did you do it? How did you get down to 110?' And the reason was, I finally had an eating disorder ... I would eat five almonds in a day and if had six I wouldn't want to leave the house." Applegate also looked back on her "Married ... with Children" character Kelly Bundy, who often was dressed like a metalhead in tight outfits, which caused the iconic actress to "want her bones to be sticking out." WARNING: Copycat Ozempic Weight Loss Drugs Are Spreading — The Risks Associated With ‘Chasing Thinness’ Looking back on how she "would never eat" while working on that show and years later, she admitted, "It was just a way of life. If I did eat something I would punish myself. I was never bulimic or anything like that. I just deprived myself of food for years and years. It was torture." When she ultimately realized her bones were sticking out and she needed to eat more, it prompted her to try to consume more calories — but often times she would destroy her food in some way, by adding too much salt or sugar or something to sabotage her meal.  She said this went on until she was in her 30s. Applegate shed some tears during the podcast episode when she thought about how she had to joke about her looks at the 2024 Emmy Awards because she "knew what everyone was thinking," as to how her looks have changed. “Body Not By Ozempic” Says Actress Christina Applegate, 52, Making Light Of Her Multiple Sclerosis Diagnosis After Standing Ovation at 2024 Emmy Awards "I was so humiliated. But that's the demon. The demon is saying these things to me and I don't want my daughter to not eat. And I'm trying not to put myself down," Applegate added. She continued, "I have really bad self-esteem issues and have my whole life. I don't want that for my kid, that freaks me out." However, she insists her 13-year-old daughter has a lot of confidence and she's proud of her for that. As for herself, Applegate said when she turned 30, she could "stand in her own presence and own strength, and not be obsessed about something that's on the outside." She insisted, "You know, we talk about this being triggering for people and I don't want anyone to think that we're sitting here talking about being thin is the best or looks. At the core of it, loving who you are is very important. Of course, my demon is yelling at me ... but man, I like myself. As a person, I know who I am. I'm a good mom. "I'm not perfect, but I know who I am."

Coping with Body Image Issues

It’s important to understand that body image problems are not unusual, especially for so many people dealing with health challenges — whether that's cancer, MS, or another type of illness. You should try to work on how you view your body because it can positively impact your emotional and physical well-being as a whole. Learning to Accept Yourself — A Huge Part of Living With Cancer “Every day of our lives is really filled with uncertainty” but those facing a cancer diagnosis tend to feel that uncertainty at a more extreme level, Dr. William Breitbart , the chair of the Department of Psychology and Behavioral Sciences at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center, previously told SurvivorNet. Dr. Breitbart also said that learning to embrace that uncertainty is a part of living, not just for those fighting cancer, but for everyone. RELATED: My Confidence Was Destroyed: Dealing With Body Image During Cancer Treatment “What the task becomes is having the courage to live in the face of uncertainty, realizing that you cannot necessarily control the uncertainty in life, like the suffering that occurs, challenges both good and bad,” Dr. Breitbart said. Learn to Forgive Yourself — Dealing With the Psychological Aspects of Cancer Meanwhile, Dr. Marianna Strongin , a New York-based licensed clinical psychologist, also has some helpful advice. She explained that spending time in front of the mirror can actually improve body image. Although “research has found that when looking in the mirror we are more likely to focus on the parts of our body we are dissatisfied with” which can cause “a negative self-view and lower self-esteem,” it’s important to look at the parts of your body that you love and the parts of your body that you don’t. Eventually, Dr. Strongin says, doing so can help you create a more accepting relationship with yourself. “Body image is both the mental picture that you have of your body and the way you feel about your body when you look in a mirror,” she said. “As you allow yourself to spend more time looking at all of you, you will begin having a new relationship with your body.” Whether you are living with cancer or some other type of illness, it’s important to know you’re not alone if you’re having a hard time with how you view your body after receiving a diagnosis or going through treatment. SurvivorNetTV Presents: ‘SN & You Body Image: Embracing Your Body’

Christina Applegate’s MS Journey

Applegate began experiencing symptoms of multiple sclerosis long before she had answers. She actually said she felt off balance during a dance sequence that occurred way back in season one of her dark comedy “Dead to Me.” She later noticed her aptitude for tennis started to fail. “I wish I had paid attention,” she previously told The New York Times . “But who was I to know?”

It took several years of worsening tingling and numbness in her extremities before her diagnosis arrived while on set. This life-altering realization wouldn’t stop Applegate from finishing her portrayal of character Jen Harding, but she did need a break. Production of the final season ceased for about five months as she began treatment. “There was the sense of, ‘Well, let’s get her some medicine so she can get better,’” Applegate said. “And there is no better. But it was good for me. I needed to process my loss of my life, my loss of that part of me. So I needed that time.” Applegate admits she’ll never fully “accept” her condition, but she did learn how to work with it. And she’s previously talked about how the show was a cathartic outlet and safe space. “I had an obligation to Liz [Feldman] and to Linda [Cardellini], to our story,” she said of the show’s writer and her co-star respectively. “The powers that be were like, ‘Let’s just stop. We don’t need to finish it. Let’s put a few episodes together.’ I said, ‘No. We’re going to do it, but we’re going to do it on my terms.'" Applegate wasn’t able to work as hard or as long or in the heat without her body giving out, but she found pride in her self-sufficiency. With the help of some adjustments to the schedule, she powered through. Nicole Vassell , a writer for The Independent, says other programs should learn from the way Applegate’s “ physical changes [were] seamlessly incorporated into the show.” “This is the first time anyone’s going to see me the way I am,” Applegate said. “I put on 40 pounds; I can’t walk without a cane. I want people to know that I am very aware of all of that.”

Understanding Multiple Sclerosis

Multiple sclerosis causes the immune system to attack cells that form the protective sheath that covers nerve fibers in the spinal cord. The disruption leads to communication problems between the brain and the rest of the body. Once the protective barrier is damaged, the spinal cord struggles to communicate to the body’s arms, legs, and other parts to function normally. The National Multiple Sclerosis Society lays out the different types of multiple sclerosis:

• Clinically isolated syndrome (CIS) is when an individual experiences a single neurological episode lasting 24 hours or less. CIS is what MS is diagnosed as until there is a second episode.
• Relapsing-remitting MS (RRMS) : The most common MS among the million people battling the disease in the US, RRMS is marked by sudden flare-ups, new symptoms, or worsening of symptoms and cognitive function. The condition will then go into remission for some time before reemerging with no known warning signs.
• Primary progressive MS (PPMS) : These individuals have no flare-ups or remission, just a steady decline with progressively worse symptoms and an increasing loss of cognitive and body functions.
• Secondary progressive MS (SPMS) : This almost transitional form of MS progresses from RRMS to PPMS.

In addition to balance issues, numbness, and tingling in the limbs, as Applegate experienced, other common MS symptoms include vision and bladder control problems. Mood changes and mental and physical fatigue are other symptoms people living with MS may experience, according to the National Institute of Health. SurvivorNetTV Presents: Defying All Odds The National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke explains this disease as: “An unpredictable disease of the central nervous system, [MS] can range from relatively benign to somewhat disabling to devastating, as communication between the brain and other parts of the body is disrupted.” Investigators of the disease believe it to be an autoimmune disease. Many people fighting MS experience muscle weakness and difficulty with coordination and balance. Currently, there is no cure for MS, although some people treat the disease using chemotherapy, medications, or steroid drugs. Contributing: SurvivorNet Staff