No ‘Shade’ But Please Stop

Can we address the elephant in the room? When did " queer/ballroom lingo " become something that everyone uses? You can't sit at brunch without hearing someone who is not in the LGBTQ community say, “no shade, no tea,” often using it out of context. Straight men now preface their shady comments with “no shade,” completely missing the nuance of its original usage. In Nicki Minaj’s song “FTCU,” she uses the line “give me my 10s,” which in the ballroom scene refers to achieving a perfect score when walking a category.

Many of us, whether LGBTQ or straight, did not know where these terms originated. It was not until the documentary Paris is Burning became available on Netflix that we learned about the creation of these words. For those unfamiliar with ballroom culture, this documentary provided crucial insight into what ballroom is, why it was created and how it became a safe space for Black and brown LGBTQ individuals.

The ballroom scene, originating in the 1920's Harlem drag balls, provided a haven for Black and Latino LGBTQ individuals to express themselves and find community in a world that marginalized them. These events were more than just performances; they were acts of resistance, celebrations of identity, and declarations of pride. Out of this scene emerged a unique lexicon that encapsulated the experiences, struggles, and triumphs of its members.

The mainstreaming into everyday vocabulary began with the rise of LGBTQ representation on social media and television, notably through shows like RuPaul's Drag Race , FX’s Pose and HBO Max’s Legendary . These platforms introduced internal terminology to a broader audience, displaying the wit, creativity, and resilience of the ballroom community. However, as these terms became popular, their original meanings and cultural significance often were diluted.

In the hands of mainstream, predominantly straight culture, these words are frequently stripped of their context and depth. The casual use of "slay" or "yas queen" by straight individuals, often in contexts far removed from their origins, can feel like a superficial nod to a culture that remains misunderstood and marginalized. This co-opting becomes problematic when it is not accompanied by an understanding or acknowledgment of the culture from which it came.

The commodification of this language by brands and influencers further exacerbates the issue. Using these terms to sell products or enhance social media personas without giving credit to their origins is a form of cultural appropriation. It reduces a rich and meaningful cultural language to mere catchphrases, void of the history and struggle they represent.

This phenomenon is not unique to ballroom culture. Many Black cultural expressions, from music to fashion to beauty trends, have been appropriated by mainstream culture. However, in the case of Black LGBTQ ballroom culture, this appropriation is particularly poignant because it involves a double marginalization—both racial and sexual. The language that emerged as a lifeline within this community is now being used by those who may not even be aware that these communities exist.

To address this issue, there must be a greater emphasis on education and respect. Allies of the Black LGBTQ community should strive to understand the origins and significance of the terms they use. Acknowledging and celebrating the contributions of Black LGBTQ individuals to our cultural lexicon is a crucial step towards genuine allyship.

Those who profit from the use of this language, be it brands or influencers, should give back to the communities from which they have borrowed. This could involve financial contributions, support for LGBTQ initiatives, or using their platforms to amplify Black LGBTQ voices.

The co-opting of Black LGBTQ ballroom culture by the straight community serves as a reminder of the importance of cultural respect and recognition. It is not enough to adopt the language of a community; one must also honor and uplift the people and history behind it. By doing so, we can ensure that the vibrant and resilient spirit of the ballroom scene is celebrated, not just imitated.