‘I joined a poly relationship only to find out I'm definitely monogamous’

One man has shared that he’s come to the conclusion that he’s definitely more interested in a monogamous relationship after trying out polyamory.

He took to the social media platform Reddit to share his story and how he came upon the discovery.

He wrote: “I (27M) am deeply in love with my boyfriend (28M). We have been friends with benefits for a very long time since he was already in a relationship with this other girl (23F) (their relationship is open), but we decided a couple months ago to make our relationship formalized and serious.

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“It was all very new and exciting for me at the time. Now, it's important to note that this is NOT a throuple. I am NOT dating his girlfriend, and I thought I would be fine with that.

“That is, until she proposed to him. Now they're planning the wedding, the honeymoon, and talking about kids. She's asked me to help her pick out decor and bridesmaid dresses. He's traveling with her and doesn't have the same amount of time to talk with me that he used to.”

There were more things about the new scenario that had the man not feeling the best.

He wrote: “A lot of really special things he and I would always do or talk about together, he and his new fiancee are doing together right now as I type. I don’t even feel like she deserves him, she could never relate to him or connect with him the way that I do…”

The man listed of the things him and his partner have in common, giving examples about why the other woman’s relationship with his partner doesn’t compare to his.

He said: “He and I share everything, every secret, and meanwhile she's ignoring the fact that he HATES kids so she can live her dream of having some.

“I've been crying myself to sleep the last two nights because it hurts so much to know that they're making core memories together (they live together) and I'm stuck on the sidelines. I just don't know what to do, and he's really my only friend, so there's no one else to talk to about this.”

Reddit users gave their opinions on the situation along with their best advice as well.

One person said: “They have had a established long term relationship compared to yours so naturally she and him want to progress theirs. if he didn’t want to go along with what this other girl wants , he wouldn’t. So you being upset that she wants things he supposedly doesn’t is a waste of your emotional energy. He sounds like he wants his cake and to eat it too.”

Another person chimed in: “They're getting married. They clearly have a very serious relationship (open or not) and you've been nothing but f-buddies until the last couple of months. It sounds like your part in this has come to an end.”

And another social media user said: “I hate to be the bearer of bad news but you have to leave this relationship. I don't think something this serious, as wanting a monogamous relationship while in a polygamous relationship can resolve itself. Don't waste any more emotional energy.”