I have always considered myself monogamous, though lately that has been questioned. Growing up in the Catholic faith, my parents were a model of two people dedicated to their vows of 40 years. (Dad passed away shortly after that anniversary.) At Our Lady of the Lake Parochial School, Catechism stressed the Ten Commandments and obedience to them. Even when dating, it was much simpler dating only one man at a time since I sometimes could confuse names when saying goodnight. Later, I cherished my husband and our marriage vows. Why then, the question of monogamy? An Irish story evolves.
Christmas of 2022 brought me an unexpected gift, Alexa and all her devices. My daughters set up the main unit, Echo, in my kitchen and two Echo Dots. The Dots were placed accordingly: One in the downstairs master bedroom, the other in the upstairs living room. Primarily, I have used the Dots to voice-activate lighting. The Dots have names so that Alexa can distinguish which is to be activated. Tommy is the bedroom Dot and Jack is the living room Dot. For those not familiar with using Alexa, the commands are given thusly, “Alexa, turn on/off Tommy.” Commands can be made for all sorts of tasks of which I have yet to avail myself — e.g., grocery lists, latest news, research, etc. I do love the music feature and can often be found dancing around my kitchen to old Beatles songs and other favorites. Chronically time challenged, Alexa will prod me along, advising me how many minutes remain to leave the house on time. My friends are grateful.
With that background, the monogamy question will now be addressed. My knowledgeable and very patient computer guru, Marvin, emailed a New Year greeting in 2024, offering a discount to his customers for a review of their computer function, malware check, etc. A visit seemed timely, especially since a recent power outage left me without printer access. Surprisingly, I had been able to hook up Echo and the Jack Dot again, though not the printer or Tommy. Now one should know that though my fingers can merrily bounce along the keys and that sometimes I even startle myself by solving a computer problem, I am basically inept. I have difficulty remembering the appropriate labels for all the functions and equipment. (After all, I only need these when conversing with Marvin.) Did I mention that Marvin is very patient? During the several hours of our visit, he will calmly review the terminology and explain repeatedly the steps necessary for various functions as I hastily take notes in the book he’s instructed me to keep on hand. I’ve noted that Marvin, a marathon runner who does not smoke, occasionally takes a break to his car during the service call. (I imagine it’s to take a deep breath and to calm his exasperation with this client.)
Despite some challenges caused by my failed efforts, Marvin eventually was able to hook up my printer and computer. The day was growing late, but he said he would look at my Dot problem, qualifying that he did not have Alexa and wasn’t familiar with its system. To my bedroom we went. Marvin re-programmed the units, and everything seemed to be working, yet Alexa would not respond. Now these visits are stressful to me as I try to muddle through the instructions and terminology. It had been a very long afternoon for both of us. Marvin remained calm and professional. Repeatedly, as he checked the system, I commanded, “Alexa, turn on Jack!” No light came on. Plugs were removed and re-plugged without result. Suddenly, I realized why and as I did so, burst into exhausted, uncontrollable laughter. Tears ran down my face. Marvin stood there, gaping at this chameleon of a woman. Finally, I was able to compose myself enough to stammer, “This is Tommy; Jack’s upstairs!” Stalwart to the end, Marvin had me issue the correct command and Tommy lit up. With a slight smile, Marvin commented, “I think you have too many men in your house!”
Dare I tell him that my daughter has given me yet another Dot? I think not, or my reputation will be forever tarnished.
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