June admits that she still wakes up in the middle of the night, thinking she can hear her daughter calling out to her.
"I just lay there thinking she's gonna ask for medicine or she's gonna do this, or she's gonna do that, but we never get to see her again," she says through tears. "We never get to touch her again or anything like that. It's a lot."
June's husband, Justin Stroud, encourages her to cry and let her emotions out, but June feels she has to keep it together for the sake of Anna's 11-year-old daughter, Kaitlyn.
"You can't tell somebody how to grieve," June tells Justin.
"I'm not telling you how to grieve," he insists, later adding, "I'm your husband, that's what I'm supposed to do. I'm supposed to try to help you grieve, and that's what I'm doing. But you can't just shut down."
Justin Stroud talks to Mama June on 'Mama June: Family Crisis.'
WEtv
The mother of four disagrees, saying she has to be strong for Kaitlyn.
"You've got to put on a brave face because now I'm raising an 11-year-old child, so you have to show her that life does go on," June says.
Justin seems concerned by June's approach, saying in a confessional interview, "Since Anna's death, June's trying to keep everything bottled up inside of her and she's not wanting to talk about it. I'm not trying to tell her how to grieve. I just want her to know that I'm here for her. It's OK to cry. It's OK to be mad, but you have to be willing to sit down and talk about it."
"This is the truth, Kylee's dad shouldn't be raising Kylee and I shouldn't be raising Kaitlyn," June told ET. "[Their] mother, Anna, should be raising themand that's what I say over and over and over again. I even tell Kaitlyn that very often, 'I'll never replace your mother.'"
According to June, she has not seen Kylee, 8, since Anna's funeral as she has been staying with her dad, Anna's ex-husband Michael Cardwell. Kaitlyn, 11, is currently in June's custody as Anna never publicly revealed the name of her elder daughter's father.
The reality TV star says that despite the circumstances, her older granddaughter has been thriving in her care and doing really well even as her "world has been tossed upside down."
"I can't answer for Kylee because we have not seen her since the funeral but Kaitlyn is doing amazing," June shared. "She's going to public school. She's doing more amazing than she was in her private school as far as grades and stuff."
As for her own grieving process, June admitted that she's been struggling in the wake of her daughter's death.
"For me personally, it's just been emotional," she said, noting that reliving Anna's final moments on the show has been particularly challenging.
Mama June: Family Crisis airs Fridays at 9 p.m. ET on WEtv.
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