Dear Annie: I started a funding campaign for sick friend and regret it.

Dear Annie: A close friend of mine, who I’ve been urging for years to save for a rainy day, is now facing a very real storm. She was diagnosed with breast cancer and is undergoing treatment. Knowing her financial situation, I felt compelled to help with her GoFundMe.

I’ve been managing updates on her journey, but the truth is, she’s always been impulsive with money, spending bonus checks on gambling, cruises, cars, fancy restaurants and vacations rather than building a safety net.

Many friends and family, seeing her past lavish lifestyle, are reluctant to donate. She’s still indulging in these expensive habits.

I feel conflicted. On the one hand, I want to support her, but on the other, I can’t condone her continued spending. I’m planning to distance myself from the GoFundMe, as it feels dishonest to beg for donations for someone who is not prioritizing her own financial recovery. What do you think?

— Tough Spot

Dear Tough Spot: If the GoFundMe page does not feel like the funds are going where they should be going, then distancing yourself is a good idea. At the same time, don’t distance yourself from your friend emotionally. She is spending money to run away from the scared, difficult feelings that she is going through. Be kind to her with your time and words. She needs a friend now more than ever, and not someone in judges’ robes.

• • •

Dear Annie: My husband and I had just retired. It was our time to relax and enjoy ourselves. He worked hard all his life to support his family and to provide a good life for all of us. He was a great man. Two days into our RV trip, my husband went for a motorcycle ride; within an hour, someone hit him from behind so hard he never had a chance.

Please let people know to keep their eyes on the road. My husband was the glue to this family. I had to sell my RV, and I have nothing left. My whole life is upside down. We had plans and they are all gone. I miss him so much. We were married for 48 years.

The only thing I have now is $250,000 of medical bills. Every day I see people driving around while using their phones, not paying attention to the road. In one second, an accident can destroy someone’s family.

— Miss His Smile

Dear Miss His Smile: I am so very sorry for your loss. I hope your letter serves as a reminder for people to pay attention when behind the wheel, and especially not to text and drive. I recommend that you seek out a grief counseling group to help process and cope with your loss.

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