'I'm trying for a baby but don't want to tell my mother-in-law - she's never happy for us'

An expectant mom has revealed she's not keen on telling her mother-in-law about her third pregnancy , as she feels her joy is never shared. She took to Reddit to share her predicament and provide some context.

She penned: "With my first [baby] mother-in-law's response to being told baby's name was - 'Oh that's nice.'

"At the time I was still lost in the fog and just figured that was fine, she had a busy week, basically any excuse to make myself feel better about being brushed off.

• 'I pranked my husband during childbirth - he deserved it after what he did'
• 'My ex and I loved this baby name - now he's using it with his new girlfriend'

"Baby two - first at pregnancy announcement sister-in-law stomped out of the room and mother-in-law went after her."

"When mother in law came back she didn't say anything about my pregnancy for the rest of the night - again I tried to brush it off but it HURT. We told them the gender weeks later.

"Then told them baby's name, the first thing out of her mouth was 'Why do you keep picking names I can't spell.'

"None of my children's names are complicated.

"Now we're trying for baby three. I don't want to tell his parents anything. They haven't cared about my kids. They haven't cared when I've been pregnant. They've only cared that they get a baby to hold for a bit then are ambivalent about my kids for weeks to months at a time.

"No idea how I'm going to tell hubs this....he loves his parents so much and has been chasing validation his whole life."

Reddit users chimed in with their opinions.

One user on social media shared: "Some grandparents don't want to be much involved. That's ok. That's better than the ones who want to take over and use your child as their do over baby. The comment about spelling was rude and I think addressing these in the moment is the best approach."

Another responded: "The complaints are an effort to control you and the baby. The apathy comes when they can't get what they want so they deprive you of what they think you want. My in-laws hounded us after we picked my oldest's name. But my in-laws are so enmeshed it meant little to them to stomp that boundary."

A further person advised: "Don't tell them anything and put a request to your hubby that he should only tell them things when they ask.. they don't make effort for you guys and your kids so why give them the privilege of keeping them updated."

And another added: "Forget about telling them about the baby, I'd be more concerned about getting your husband into therapy so he can stop traumatizing himself by chasing validation from people who are never going to give it to him because they don't give a shit about him."