“They Want to Be Left Alone” — Man Says There’s a Reason People Ghost After High School

Some people want to leave their past behind. And Israell ( @imisraell ) learned this lesson first hand after interacting with an old friend from middle school years later.

After his conversation with him, the TikToker said he soon found out the guy was intentionally ghosting from his past life and the people in it.

Israell documented his experience in a video, which begins with him expressing a thought many of us had probably had in the past:

"Y'all know them people that go completely ghost after high school? And like you be sitting there one day like oh, I wonder what what's-her-name is doing. You even think about maybe trying to find them so that way y'all can catch up or something?"

According to Israell, looking these "ghosted" folks up in an attempt to try and reconnect with them is almost always a bad idea, and he explains why.

"Don't. Them people don't wanna be bothered," he says, laughing.

"Let me tell you I had found one of my old homeboys like we was cool in like middle school, not as much in high school, but then after high school, I never heard about him," he says, explaining how his relationship with the guy deteriorated over time.

Israell went on, "I forgot how I found him but I had hit him up and I was like hey bro how you been? Like, I hope you're doing good. Just trying to catch up. And he ended up chopping it up with me I found out bro got a good job. He graduated college, he got a family, like, bro got two kids. He's good."

The TikToker divulged some more information about his old friend (but not too much) and added, "He even in another state, which I won't say because I don't want nobody to find him."

Even though his old friend was cool and they shared what sounded like a great conversation, the man stated that he didn't want to talk to anyone else that they knew from back when he was younger.

"But then as soon as we got done catching up he told me bro can you please unfollow me, I don't want nobody else to be able to find me. And I was like damn, it's that serious?" he continued.

Israell went on, "He told me, Yeah bro, once I left that town, there was nothing else left for me.' And I had to respect it. So all I'm saying is you thinking about somebody and you like damn I haven't heard from what's his name — leave them alone. They made it that way on purpose."

There were more than a few folks who wrote in the comments section that they themselves were "one of the ghosts" he was referring to in his video.

Someone else said, "Protecting his peace, gotta respect it."

Another replied that they, too, understood individuals who feel like they found where they belonged after moving away from their hometown: "Sometimes the places our parents chose to raise us isn’t the place our soul desires. Once we find where we truly belong, it’s a different type of serenity that we don’t want disturbed."

There was another user on the application who believed that there was a psychological component to this rejection of people we knew when we were younger: "I think it's because our high school friends remember a version of ourselves that no longer exists."

"Man gave you closure and reestablished boundaries. Respect to you for upholding his request," someone else said, giving props to Israell.

And then there were those who didn't necessarily like the high school versions of themselves all that much: "Yup, for some people high school wasn’t the best time of their lives. Especially for introverts. They probably excel after HS in the real world."

One TikTok user thought that people's intentions aren't always the best when they clock someone from their childhood around them: "Yea cuz ppl from hometowns will try to block your success and they love holding on to a version of you that makes them comfortable!"

This person said that even when they visit their mom they'll intentionally disguise their appearance to make sure old folks don't see them: "Nobody from high school exists to me lol, even when I go back home to see my mother I’ll wear a hoody to avoid people at all cost."