Opinion: The Best Business Advice: Don’t Stay Single

It doesn’t make sense to put aside a relationship to focus on your career

Photo byMohamed_hassan on Pixabay

Past a certain age, there’s something of a haves and have-nots between single people and people in relationships. Granted, having kids can all but eliminate this inequality, but for those without, the so-called “dinks” (“dual-income, no kids), life is good. Interestingly, a lot of young people seem to treat a relationship as something that distracts from a career, but for those trying to get ahead in life, there’s probably no easier way to get a leg up than to partner up.

Splitting Costs

The most obvious reason for this is sharing costs. Housing is the average American’s biggest expense. Since most couples will share a room and a bed, and can essentially co-exist in space that under any other circumstances would be for one, they can cut this expense right in half. The next biggest expense faced by the average American deals with transportation, and there are plenty of opportunities for those who carpool, or otherwise share a vehicle, to reduce this financial burden.

Moving past the two biggest expenditures, we can zoom down into the smaller expenses. Utilities might see a marginal cost increase with the addition of another person, but for the most part, if you had the a/c going or the lights on for one, another person can come in and benefit from those same basic utilities at zero added cost. Groceries can become cheaper as you’re better able to buy in bulk and less food goes to waste. All of those subscriptions to Hulu, Netflix, Amazon Prime, Spotify, etc., can either be shared without shelling out a single dollar more, or they can be upgraded to a family account that’s cheaper than two separate ones.

Helper

There are hundreds of situations where just having someone there and drawing on one another’s ability to help or resources becomes a huge benefit. Usually couples can slingshot each other forward in life, as one can, for example, cover the bills while the other goes back to school, so that after a time, both can enjoy the increased income that often attends having a degree. This same scenario can play out with starting a business.

They can group their resources, or make them available to each other, opening the door to things neither of them could’ve done alone. This can allow them to purchase a home or make other significant investments for their future.

Then, there are all the little money savers. Maybe one partner is going out of town, and they can now save on an Uber to and fro the airport, as their partner agrees to drive them. Perhaps they would’ve needed to hire a pet-sitter for the trip if they were single but no longer. Some busy work weeks might preclude us from cooking our own food like usual, but a partner can step in to help, and keep us from breaking the bank having to get food from restaurants all week.

Feedback & Emotional Support

Just having a second brain around who is intimately acquainted with the goings-on in our lives is invaluable. A partner can be a great source of ideas and feedback. No one else knows what you’re doing, and what you’re trying to accomplish like they do, and they have the added advantage of not having the myopia that comes with being a direct actor. Some of the greatest advice most people will ever get in their lives will come from their romantic partner.

Equally invaluable is the emotional support they offer us. Our capacity to work and work well is amplified when we have someone we can vent to, and relax with, at home. A warm message of support from our partner can keep us from the brink during those tough times in our career progression. They can be there to reassure us of what we’re doing and to give us perspective when we’ve lost it.

Less Distractions

Another way relationships help is simply by keeping us from all that goes into single life. If we’re having to date and go out, that’s just one more thing we need to try to squeeze into our schedule. It can also be very expensive to date — whether you’re paying for all of it and treating your date or if you’re just covering your half. Indeed, there’s work that goes into every stage of it: Having to find people to go out with, setting up the dates, getting yourself put together, traveling back and forth, etc., are all huge drains on your time.

An aspect of this that’s fairly abstract, but that I’ve seen seriously impede people’s progress, is the way serial dating can play on someone’s motivation. Dating can be very exciting and distracting. We may stay preoccupied with a new encounter or end up acting impulsively in the throes of a passionate dalliance, but even deeper than this, we may start to get validation from dating that can cause us to lose focus on what’s really important. A lot of men and women derive a serious amount of self-esteem from the positive feedback they get when others are attracted to them. If they’re not careful, they can end up feeling like they’re doing better than they are, just because the people they’ve met for dates have been hyping them up.

A firm, healthy relationship is calm and steady, making it far less distracting. It doesn’t involve all the emotional ups and downs that come with a less structured and newer relationship. You can spend time with an established partner in more constructive and less costly ways. Trips to the grocery store, watching a movie, going for a walk or to the gym all become a joy when you’re with someone you love, and these are much better for your health and your wallet than what most first, second, and third dates are apt to consist of.

Conclusion

There are a few big ways that being in a relationship will help you get ahead in life and a hundred small ones. People who say they’re too busy focusing on their careers to get involved with someone may have not considered all the benefits that being partnered up comes with. Granted, if you add kids into the equation, you’re going to counterbalance that in a very significant way. However, young people that are ready to fall in love, cohabitate, and be there for each other — and maybe hold off on bringing little ones into the picture for the time being — are sure to experience a boon to whatever it is they’re trying to do.

There’s no easier way to facilitate your move up in the world than by banding together with someone who you’ve developed a mutual affinity with.