In her new memoir Selling Sunshine , which hits shelves on Tuesday (Sept. 24), the real estate icon is taking fans back through her origin story, which delves into her experience with teen pregnancy, being a survivor of sexual assault, battling financial and fertility struggles, and overcoming previous unhealthy relationships.
As for why Bonnet opted to open up now, she cites her platform, which has grown over the course of her run on the show and has allowed for her to connect with others experiencing similar struggles.
“If I can use my platform for good, I wanted to go ahead and do it,” she shares.
Of course, Bonnet’s co-stars from the Netflix real estate reality series make their way into the book, though she tells DECIDER that none have read the book just yet. However, she assures us that they “will all be getting” a copy.
“There’s a lot of relationship changes, there’s a lot of tears, there’s a lot of funny moments,” she highlights. “Great drama, great outfits, and probably the best real estate I think that we’ve had in any of our seasons.”
Bonnet joined us in the DECIDER studio ahead of the Season 8 premiere to talk all things Selling Sunshine and Selling Sunset . Check out our conversation below.
Photo: Lindy Lin
DECIDER: I really enjoyed getting to read this book and hearing your voice come through in the story. As a first time author, how did you approach incorporating your own voice into your storytelling?
BONNET: I really wanted to make it authentic to myself. It’s actually written from almost like a [work of] fiction… so the dialogue was actually in there where there’s the back and forth so that people can almost feel what the situation was, like how you put yourself in it. You can almost hear the conversations going on. So I thought that was a really cool way of doing it. And then, I was just really open and and tried to describe every story, even when it was hard, like the way it was to just make it as authentic as possible. The only time I left anything out was really when it would embarrass or hurt somebody that I care about. And so I decided not to include certain stories that would do that. But, other than that, I opened up, it’s in there.
Do you think after this experience you’d consider ever writing again or writing something else?
I would. It was a very long experience and very hard, but I think it’s actually really good and cathartic, really. Although it was very difficult at the time and there was a lot of therapy that needed to happen, like opening up and putting myself back in certain situations that were traumatic. But, I think it’s going to help a lot of people. And at the end of the day, I think it’s helped me a little bit too.
I really admire your vulnerability in this memoir, starting out with your story of having your son Austin, to previous unhealthy relationships, to being raped and sharing your fertility struggles. Why did you choose now to to delve into this story?
I think when I started realizing that with my platform right now, through social media, just seeing people out and they would come up to me and just thank me for opening up because it helped with fertility, like it helped their wife going through her miscarriage or something. There are a lot of different situations where I realized that it helps. So if I can use my platform for good, I wanted to go ahead and do it.
For the castmates that you mentioned in Selling Sunshine , both past and present, such as Christine , Amanza , Jason , and more, were they aware that you wrote about them? Do they know what may be mentioned about them in this?
Jason’s very scared. I wanted to just warn him that I did tell about the breakup and what he did, and he’s like, “No, wait, what did I do?” And he couldn’t remember. So I told him, and he’s like, “You wrote that?” I was like, “Well, you did it.” And [he’s like], “I know, but you wrote it?” I was like, “Don’t worry, I sang your praises the rest of the time.” But I had to tell the truth. So he’s a little scared, but I think all my friends know I’m never going to hurt them. And even with Christine, I didn’t — I mean, we’re not really friends or anything anymore, but I’m not going to try to hurt her. I mean, I don’t want to hurt anybody. I changed the names of everybody else in my life, [that] I spoke about, because I don’t know where they’re at. They might have changed. They might have gotten better. They might have, I don’t know, whatever it is, I just want to hurt them. But I can tell my story without hurting somebody else.
And none of them have gotten to read the book yet?
No.
Will they be getting copies? Or do they have to go head out to Barnes and Noble to go pick this up?
My castmates will all be getting one. Some of the people in the story… I don’t know if they know. If they follow me on social or if they see, they probably know. But yeah, their names are changed so they can go buy it.
You mentioned in the book that you resigned from your manager position in Season 7 and you were citing some of the drama going down with your castmates. Is the drama on screen what we see really real — how it’s being portrayed, how it’s being conveyed, how you feel watching it?
It’s definitely real, and it’s still going on. I’m still on the phone almost every day dealing with the new drama that’s happened after we all watched this season. We just finished watching it, so there’s a lot of drama going on right now between the cast members. And so I’m on the phone trying to mediate again. Even though I’m not the manager, I still do it. Glutton for punishment.
Several lines in Selling Sunshine really stuck with me, one of them being, “The intersection of fame and friendship is a delicate juncture, especially when the people you work with are the same people you play with.” Elaborate on this sentiment in the context of you and your Selling Sunset castmates.
I feel blessed that I get to wake up and I get to do the show with all of my castmates, because a lot of them have been friends for a very long time. But when you are out trying to network with all your other friends who happen to be agents too, [it] makes it kind of difficult, and it makes it a challenge to get clients and stuff. And then when you’re on the show and there’s arguments between people… you don’t want to choose sides, but then, for example, like Chrishell and Nicole , when they were going at it — and apparently are again — I would have to choose. Which one am I going to invite to to my house for a party? If I have a barbecue, who am I going to invite? Because I have to choose. When Jason and Chrishell broke up, like whoever it is… I think my assistant was trying to have a birthday party for me, and it was an impossible job because who gets along with who and who are we allowed to invite? Because if you invite this person, [then] this person can’t come… It’s interesting. I mean, that’s our show.
You talk about this idea of becoming a character on reality TV, or a character of yourself. Have you seen any shifts in your character over the course of your time on Selling Sunset ?
No. I mean, it’s really who I am. But people consider us characters, and it’s really who we are. But I feel like I have taken more of a role on trying to show who I am. Like, in this season, my hair is pink, like a blush color. Because I I do have a more adventurous, kind of energetic streak than just being there, just doing real estate, just doing this. There’s many layers to me. And I feel like they wanted me just to have the same hair… like, why am I not allowed to change that? So then I just did, so small things. If I want something, I think it just shows my personality a little bit more is why I started doing stuff like that.
Photo: Courtesy of Netflix
Not only has Selling Sunset infiltrated your social life, but it also has a hold on your love life. You even sold the property that you and Romain got married in on your wedding day, which I thought was iconic. Do you ever feel the need to separate certain aspects of your life from the show?
Yeah. I think there are some things, like is Romain and I have an argument about something, we don’t need to put that on [the show]. If there’s an actual situation where I feel like it’s a real life thing, but just some stupid bickering. I’m not going to talk about that because then people run with that and they think things are an actual situation, when in reality it’s just like, no, you just had a bad day and you just bickered. So I try to keep some of that stuff just behind closed doors, because it’s not a big deal. But if it is big deal, then I’ll talk about it.
You wrote that you and Romain have discussed doing a spinoff if and when the show ends. Can you tell us more about this vision for a potential spinoff?
Well, we both love to travel. So my kind of dream would be to be able to do some sort of a spinoff where I could find the vacation home kind of things or like a villa to do like a little Airbnb or something like that. And then he would remodel it, and we can travel all over the world and find like little, mini hotels, or something like that to renovate to put on the show. Then we get to travel at the same time.
Who of your co-stars would you consider featuring on the show if you had the choice?
All of them, really. Yeah. I mean I get along with everybody.
What are you hoping that readers take away from Selling Sunshine ?
I think that no matter where you are, whatever you’re going through, that you can look at a bright side in anything. It hopefully will help people get through certain situations or feel like they’re not alone. And then also, there’s something to take from anything, even if it’s just don’t to do it again. Like, just switching a mindset or looking at a positive side in everything can really be helpful.
You talk about several collaborations and partnerships that you do with different brands, and also your motivation to why you decided to partner with them. Which of the ones that you mention in the book has probably been your favorite to partner with and why?
This is going to sound crazy, but probably the IBS medicine. It’s actually because it made such a big difference for me and I decided to actually do that because so many people deal with IBS, and women don’t want to talk about it because we’re not supposed to, like, have any issues. Right? But it’s helped so many people and it was a blessing for me. I went through so many things, tried so much stuff. I had tests done all the time. And until then I was like, literally nothing’s going to happen. I would have to take days off work and everything because I couldn’t leave the house. It was so bad. So then I just decided to be open about it. I’m like, well, I’m already married, so my husband stuck with me. So it doesn’t matter if people think it’s gross or whatever because it’s real.
What can you tease, if anything, about Selling Sunset Season 8 coming out soon?
There’s so much drama. When I was watching it, I’m like, what? What happened? I’d get to the next episode, and for me to live it and still be that blown away. There’s a lot of relationship changes, there’s a lot of tears, there’s a lot of funny moments. Great drama, great outfits, and probably the best real estate I think that we’ve had in any of our seasons. I think we have some epic homes on it this time. I think, personally, it’s our best season.
You said that you got to watch already. Who were you watching with?
Romain. I watched part of it myself, and then I got a tiny bit ahead. He fell asleep before, and so I didn’t want to stop watching. He was like, ‘You’re watching it without me!'” So we were in different rooms watching at different times. Then I was like, ‘Oh my God! You won’t believe what happened. Get to this part and come talk to me.’ So then he’d come in. He’s like, ‘I saw it.’ And I was like, ‘OK, wait.’ And we’d have a good conversation about it. Because even when we’re living it, we don’t get to see every scene. We don’t know what’s happening, and we don’t know what people are saying in interviews until we see it. It’s fun to have our own watch party too because it gets crazy.
Do you think you see a Season 9 in the show’s future?
Oh yeah. Yeah, for sure.
Selling Sunshine is out on Tuesday, Sept. 24 . Selling Sunset Seasons 1-8 are now streaming on Netflix.
If you or someone you know needs to reach out about sexual abuse or assault, RAINN is available 24/7 at 800-656-HOPE (4673), or online at RAINN.org .
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