The laughter of children too young to understand it all could be heard while their mothers, fathers and other relatives shared tears and hugs at Military Park.
Dozens gathered by the park fountain this week to light candles and release balloons in remembrance of loved ones lost to murder.
Among them was Shanelle McHenry, whose 16-year-old son Kemaj was killed in a drive-by shooting last year in Moore.
Against the fountain, McHenry placed a poster of photos of Kemaj and spoke about missing her son.
“His smile,” she said. “Coming home and him saying he loved me. Everything.”
Family, friends take part in National Day of Remembrance for Murder Victims
The candlelight vigil and balloon release took place on the National Day of Remembrance for Murder Victims, which Congress designated in 2007.
In 2023, there were about 2,500 fewer homicides in the United States, marking an 11.6% decrease over the previous year, according to the FBI.
Still, there were 19,252 murders.
Among the victims was Daniel Howard, 22. He was shot to death during an altercation on New Year’s Day 2023 at the now-closed Sunset Patio Lounge in Midtown.
The candlelight vigil and balloon release on Wednesday at Military Park was spearheaded by his mother, Stephanie Howard.
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“A lot of times when you lose a loved one, your relatives are also going through the same emotional feelings,” said Howard, of the Making it Through Support Group. “He was the youngest out of nine. And it kinda hit us hard and sometimes you feel like no one can relate, no one wants to talk about it in your family. The support group — everybody can relate.”
Daniel Howard most recently played football at Fort Hays State University in Kansas. He was named to The Oklahoman's 2018 Little All-City Football team as a defensive back. He also played quarterback for Millwood where he won two state championships.
At the time of his death, Howard’s coach at Fort Hays, Chris Brown, said of him: “Daniel was a tremendous teammate and a loving, caring and supportive individual. He had a great personality and infectious smile. Daniel truly loved his Tiger football family.”
In the throes of grief over her son, Stephanie Howard took solace in her faith.
“I just believe that it was God's plan to take him home,” she said. “I know kids that get shot eight times and make it. I miss him daily, but the thing’s out of my control. It’ll make you sick and ill having to think about the thought of losing a child, but I tell my parents — be blessed to have had him. Some people can’t have kids. And if they do, some don’t last as long as ours do. They hadn’t lived a full life, but long enough for us to get to know them.”
Around 8 p.m., one of Daniel’s brothers, Rev. Rufus D. Howard of Mount Triumph-Sherman Chapel in Spencer, led people in prayer, asking for God’s strength.
Those gathered held orange balloons that symbolized seeking an end to gun violence. Or, they held black and red balloons in remembrance of murdered loved ones.
After the prayer, Howard encouraged attendees to release the balloons.
With those on the ground looking up to the clear sky over Oklahoma City, the balloons gently rose together, separated, and were gone.
“Release ’em into heaven, release ’em into heaven,” Howard said. “Say their name. Say their name. Say their name…”
(This story was updated to change a photo.)
This article originally appeared on Oklahoman: 'Say their name': Vigil held in OKC for loved ones lost to murder
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