<body><div><img src="https://img.particlenews.com/image.php?type=thumbnail_580x000&amp;url=27ql9Y_0vzWPqjs00" alt="https://img.particlenews.com/image.php?url=27ql9Y_0vzWPqjs00" width="1528" height="800" >"This is hard and I can't do this..."Ahh, the old negative self-talk. Sometimes a phrase like this just flashes through your mind but sometimes it stops you dead in your tracks as you stare into the bathroom mirror and heave a long sigh.I've found myself negative-self-talking lately as I experience growing pains in my business.And get this: I'm a motivational speaker. Go figure, right?Well, maybe it does figure.Maybe, just maybe, motivation isn't the right tool for this job.Hear me out, Tony Robbins.The subtitle of my first book, Magic Words, promises to offer "the science and secrets behind 7 words that motivate, engage, and influence."Most people would approach "This is hard and I can't do this" with an attempt to motivate, but I think a better tool for the job is influence. Yes, even if the person we're attempting to influence is ourselves. Here's why:Motivation responds to "This is hard" with "No it's not. It's easy. Just imagine (aka pretend) that it's easy and it will magically become easy." This is a denial — which is why motivation fades after you get back from the conference and you're no longer able to deny the reality of Monday morning.Influence responds to "This is hard" with "...but I'm strong and capable." This is an acknowledgement of reality and a refocusing on who you are and what you can control vs. the situation itself.Motivation responds to "I can't do this" with "Yes, you can!" This is an argument — which is why your inner self digs in its heels with an even more emphatic, "No, I can't! And I'll prove it!"Influence responds to "I can't do this," with "...yet." This is a mindset that again acknowledges reality. In this case, it acknowledges two realities that co-exist: 1. You can't do it now. 2. You will be able to.Motivation impacts our mood. Influence speaks to our very identity.While our moods are easier to change than our identities, our identities have a much stronger impact on our behavior.Ten years after the release of my book, I'm still amazed by the incredible power of words like "but," "yet," and "and" to not only influence others, but also ourselves.Let's use the right tool for the job. Let's get away from focusing on the situation and get back to focusing on the person. We can't change the circumstance, but we can change our response.</div></body>

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Two Magic Words That Defeat Negative Self-Talk

\"This is hard and I can't do this...\" Ahh, the old negative self-talk. Sometimes a phrase like this just flashes through your mind but sometimes it stops you dead in your tracks as you stare into the bathroom mirror and heave a long sigh. I've found myself negative-self-talking lately as...

"This is hard and I can't do this..." Ahh, the old negative self-talk. Sometimes a phrase like this just flashes through your mind but sometimes it stops you dead in your tracks as you stare into the bathroom mirror and heave a long sigh. I've found myself negative-self-talking lately as...

Two Magic Words That Defeat Negative Self-Talk

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