DEAR ABBY: My 18-year-old stepdaughter has decided to date another female. She has dated boys in the past, but that’s not the issue. We have nothing against the LGBTQ community. (My husband’s brother is gay.)
My issue is, should my stepdaughter spend time with her girlfriend in her bedroom with the door closed?
If this were a boy, my husband would certainly have an issue with it — fear of sexual activity leading to getting pregnant.
We are both old school about that but have embraced her new relationship. But we definitely don’t want our house to be the hook-up point. It makes us uncomfortable.
How should we handle this? — OPEN DOOR IN PENNSYLVANIA
DEAR OPEN DOOR: Handle this the same way you would if you were writing about the young woman having a boyfriend.
Dear Abby: My long-distance boyfriend doesn’t want me to visit him — I feel like a ‘side piece’
Tell her you are uncomfortable with sexual activity going on in your home and prefer that if she entertains her girlfriend in her bedroom, she must leave the door open.
DEAR ABBY: My husband and I recently moved to a smaller town from a big city to be closer to our new grandbaby.
This town is populated with a large number of older single women and, since day one, they have been drawn in droves to my husband, who is a very good-looking older man.
These women behave as if I am not even there. They move very close to us while we are shopping and flirt with him. I have had to physically insert myself between one of them and my husband on several occasions.
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Not only is this annoying while it’s happening, but I’m having a hard time making friends.
More than one female friend has developed an unhealthy crush on him, so I no longer trust other women. What do I do? — JUST THE WIFE IN VERMONT
DEAR WIFE: You are going to have to decide to what degree you trust your husband not to stray, and concentrate your efforts on making friends with other couples .
It would also be nice if your husband could remind these women that he’s married and that you’re right there.
DEAR ABBY: My wife went on vacation with her best friend. While they were there, they visited a nudist resort. She admitted she took off her bathing suit and went swimming. Her friend also did.
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I was fuming to think she would undress in front of strangers. I feel betrayed. It makes me sick to my stomach to think she did this to me.
Am I wrong to be anxious and mad about the situation? — DRESSED IN MAINE
DEAR DRESSED: I would have to know more about the clothing optional resort your wife and her friend visited.
The nudist lifestyle is not a swinging singles weekend. It is often enjoyed by entire families, and the atmosphere is healthy.
Please get off the defensive and ask your wife to tell you more about her “adventure,” which may have been no more than innocent fun and had nothing to do with you .
You do not “own” her body, just her heart — if you are lucky.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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