<body><div><figure><img src="https://img.particlenews.com/image.php?type=thumbnail_580x000&amp;url=1XW50E_0wEZ8sxh00" alt="https://img.particlenews.com/image.php?url=1XW50E_0wEZ8sxh00" width="696" height="464" ><figcaption>Finances, technology, social media and the news are some of the main stressors for parents.</figcaption></figure>This Summer, August 28, Surgeon General Vivek Murthy announced, based on a report from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, that too many parents are experiencing excessive stress. The Surgeon General declared it a public health issue.According to the report, 41% of parents said they are “so stressed they cannot function” most days, and 48% said that stress is overwhelming.Stressors identified in the report include finances, technology, social media, the news and the growing mental health crisis overall.Local therapists and community members provide advice on managing stress for parents and others experiencing stress.<h2>Check in an validate stressors</h2>“My biggest recommendation to parents is always to check how they are functioning as a team,” Erin Ernst, LMSW, CCTP, PMH-C, said. “Being aligned in terms of family beliefs and practices helps kids to feel secure and families to function well as a unit.”Ernst has been a practicing therapist for almost 17 years and is a clinician and co-owner at Ann Arbor Behavioral Health Associates, which was founded in 2019.Parents also cite being stressed by financial strains, time demands, children’s health/safety, growing gun violence reported, social media/technology pressures, isolation/loneliness and other pressures.“These are big and complex topics that have to be targeted from a variety of levels, including systemic changes, particularly when it comes to gun violence and increasing costs,” said Lona Phillips, LMSW, founder and director of Lotus Consulting in Ann Arbor.“To keep up with basic needs and childcare costs, many parents work more than ever and then are subjected to the influence and court of public opinion pressures on social media and other places, fueling extreme stress, burnout, sense of inadequacy and competition,” said Phillips. “It can become a vicious cycle, affecting everyone involved. There is no winning in this race.”Christina DeAngelis, MA, LLP, is a psychotherapist and a doctoral candidate in Counseling Psychology at Wayne State. DeAngelis has ten years of experience as a psychotherapist and suggests that it would also be helpful if societal changes could be made to support parents.“A healthy parent-child relationship is foundational to a healthy society,” DeAngelis said. “Parenting is a critical aspect of a successful society and must be regarded as such. More policies and laws around paid parental leave and affordable childcare are necessary. Community support and resources for families are critical. We collectively must expect more.”While more societal, economic and other supports are being developed, therapists suggest some daily tips for managing stress and boosting mood.<h2>Manage stress and consider suggestions</h2>“Play is so underrated,” Ernst said. “Having regular positive experiences together helps people to feel close and secure. On top of that, allowing for conversations and opinions helps us to process and not internalize stressful experiences — even the normal ones. Finally, routines are hugely helpful and support families in functioning at their best.”For instance, play is not just for children. Adults can participate in play, which alleviates stress and boosts mood. Some great playful activities for adults and children include pickleball, board games, puzzles, frisbee, bocce, treasure hunts and almost any sport. Outdoor activities are particularly helpful. One can play a game and be playful about household chores such as cooking or putting away clothes.Phillips outlined the following helpful steps:<ol><li>Identify primary stressors.</li><li>Simplify and reduce where you can. What are the “must haves” and “nice to haves?</li><li>Keep in mind that “nobody does this alone.” Lean on your family and community resources for help. Connect with other parents, ask in local forums and connect with local entities that offer support in the domains you need.</li><li>See what resources your employer offers. Some have resources for childcare when ill. Some offer HSA cards in their benefits package, and this can be the difference between being able to seek resources like therapy or not.</li><li>Evaluate whether your current path aligns with your core values. If not, what tweaks can you make to realign?</li><li>Be mindful of how you use your resources and information. What is helpful, and what creates more stress?</li></ol><ol><li>Listen or re-discover your inner wisdom.</li></ol>“While I can’t speak for everyone, I think the whole ‘managing stress’ thing can feel daunting or like it’s supposed to be this grand thing,” DeAngelis said. “Maybe the idea is oversold to us that managing stress has to look bigger than it does. In reality, easing stress can instead look like small things. Children — and adults — thrive when we feel safe and secure enough. Family routines, rituals, quality time and moments of sharing joy can go a long way. Family routines and rituals look different for everyone. Still, they might look like reading before bed, eating dinner at the kitchen table, singing together or sitting alongside your child while they play with toys.”Some employers will even pay for gym memberships or therapy to help with job-related stress or other life stressors.The Surgeon General’s report also stated that many parents feel totally overwhelmed at times, so it is important to recognize this condition as well.<h2>Identify bring overwhelmed and seeking help </h2>“I think this (being overwhelmed) can mean different things for different people, but when we cannot do the things we want or need to do because we are experiencing such a high level of distress or dysfunction, that would be my definition of ‘so stressed one cannot function,’” Ernst said. “When we feel this way, I first go back to addressing the basics —sleeping, eating and drinking and moving our bodies. These have a massive impact on our sense of well-being. Then we can address the bigger stuff — one thing at a time.”Experts do state, however, that having consistent, repeated and prolonged feelings of being overwhelmed could indicate the need to get professional help.“This (numbered strategies mentioned above) may seem like an impossible task when feeling overwhelmed,” said Phillips. “At Lotus, we help folks navigate the overwhelm in and out of sessions. We are here to walk with you in the overwhelm, support you while outside of your window of tolerance, and lead you through it skillfully, giving you space to process and gain new skills, clarity and focus. We are one resource to lean on. At times, more than outpatient therapy is needed; more acute respite and medical attention may be necessary, including medication management or inpatient care, in order to regain balance. While wait periods in emergency rooms can be long at times, they can accelerate access to necessary, helpful care.”It is also important to know when professional or medical help is needed.“I think of seeking therapy like seeking any other medical treatment,” Erst said.“When symptoms and/ or generalized distress impact a person’s ability to do the things they want and need to do in life — i.e. go to school or work, see friends, complete daily tasks like brushing our teeth or taking a shower, et cetera — it is time to seek help. We deserve to feel well both physically and mentally, and treatment is available. Sometimes people still feel stigmatized, but overall, our culture is moving in the direction of embracing what we now know to be true — therapy works.”Phillips agrees, and said,“Fortunately, mental health is more and more destigmatized every day, but for folks who are unsure, we are always happy to connect and answer questions,” said Phillips. “We also can’t forget that some people feel more comfortable taking the first step toward help with their physician, their church or temple, and for some folks, calling or texting a crisis line may be the least difficult step to make. Whatever the first step, take it. Nobody does it alone.”DeAngelis has a similar take on seeking professional help. “There is no perfect time to seek professional help,” said DeAngelis. “Seek professional help when you believe it feels right for you. I think the stigma of psychotherapy is decreasing, especially with younger generations. However, many still feel stigmatized, and there may be understandable reasons. Some cultures look at psychotherapy as an inappropriate airing of business better left sorted out among family and close confidants. For others, reaching out to a therapist may signal weakness or vulnerability. The bottom line is that it’s important for people to understand that having feelings of stigma does not mean that therapy isn’t a viable option to turn to (and the very act of turning to therapy may consequently diminish the sense of stigma).”<h2>More suggestions</h2>Other tips to alleviate stress individually and with family include<ul><li>Self-care: taking baths, good sleep, naps, creative art therapy, play therapy, exercise</li><li>Turn off television, news and social media. Stop comparing culture and emphasis on consuming/negative information.</li><li>Take long walks or simply be in nature.</li><li>Consider yoga, meditation and prayer.</li><li>Specific fun exercise: swim, pickleball, hiking, walk</li><li>Connecting with the community such as through religious organizations, the arts community, local gym, interest clubs</li><li>Engage in forms of play and positive entertainment that make you feel good.</li><li>Eating healthier diets, focusing on fruits, veggies and lean proteins.</li><li>Have family meetings to validate feelings and manage solutions</li><li>Simplify life to get good sleep, nutrition and exercise.</li><li>Vacation mindset: it is great to plan a family vacation but also plan things to look forward to, like going locally to the cider mill or park or festival.</li><li>Listen to music — live or recorded, even play an instrument if you can. Or sing!</li><li>Consider getting a pet — owning a furry friend has many mental health benefits.</li><li>Work and support policies to change a fast-paced consumer culture to a therapeutic and caring one for all.</li></ul></div></body>

Mountain View, CA

NewsBreak

Parents Experience Overwhelming Stress, Local Therapists Help

This Summer, August 28, Surgeon General Vivek Murthy announced, based on a report from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, that too many parents are experiencing excessive stress. The Surgeon General declared it a public health issue. According to the report, 41% of parents said they are “so...