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I first had a mocktail while pregnant with my now 2-year-old son. I figured, if I couldn’t have a drink while out with friends, I’d give this alcohol-free look-a-like a shot. As my belly grew, I started to get looks from people who couldn’t tell my drink did not contain alcohol. I imagine I’m not alone in getting these looks, but it’s a different demographic altogether that has people raising eyebrows by ordering mocktails these days: children.
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Where I live in New York City, it’s not uncommon to see tweens and teens order a mocktail with their lunch at local restaurants. At dinner, adults enjoying a beverage while their kids enjoy the alcohol-free version with them, has also become more common. The kids are happy — they get to participate — and the adults seem relaxed, even able to enjoy some semblance of a date night , kids in tow.
The pros of this practice seem straight forward. Kids are able to participate in social activities that involve drinking (without actually drinking alcohol themselves) and adults may get to relax. The cons, however, are real too. While there are no studies on the subject, it’s possible that drinking mocktails that resemble an adult drink, and doing so in a way that makes it a learned and rehearsed behavior, will make it so that kids and teens are more likely to drink the real thing as soon as they turn 21. Having rehearsed the behavior does not make young adults more likely to drink safely. On the contrary, it’s possible they’ll drink more — a habit created by the fake thing, and later allowed and acceptable when old enough.
What are parents to do then, especially given the lack of studies and clear guidance on the matter? I believe we can implement a few common sense practices.
First, there really is no reason a child or teen should be drinking an alcohol-free beer or wine. The packaging, marketing, and taste are simply too close to the real thing.
When it comes to the fun-looking mocktails, if your child has not requested one yet, don’t offer it. Let them keep drinking water or their preferred soda or juice as a treat when you are out. If they have started to ask for mocktails, approach the conversation from a place of curiosity: do they like a flavor they see listed? Is it a fun-glass they’re after? Do they just want to do what the adults are doing? From there, you may be able to come up with alternatives. Perhaps a sparkling water in the glass they found cool will do the trick.
It is also important to model the ability to have fun without alcohol. If your children are only watching you relax and have fun with a drink in hand, they could come to believe that they too need a fun-looking drink to have a good time.
If you have modeled good behavior, tried to come up with alternatives, and at the end of the day, your kids insist on the mocktail, one is not likely to cause a long-term problem. As a pediatrician, I worry more about the habits and behavior that having these regularly can create.
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