Opinion: Are You More Attractive Than You Think?

Photo by Henri Pham on Unsplash

In this article we will talk about five signs you're way more attractive than you think.

We all tend to perceive ourselves differently from how others see us — at least to some extent.

While taking care of yourself and your appearance can positively influence your attractiveness, our behaviors and attitude have a stronger impact on how others perceive us.

There are people who have an inflated sense of self and who feel superior to others.

There are people who have a healthy level of self-confidence and who don’t feel superior to anyone, nor inferior.

And then there are people who are too humble to see how amazing they are.

Signs You're More Attractive Than You Think

Many of us belong the category of people who are too humble to see their own worth, and who feel less attractive than how they actually are.

If you’re one of these people, the following signs may help you see you're actually more attractive than you think.

1. You Have a Strong Life Purpose and Are Enthusiastic About It

Living with purpose doesn’t automatically make you attractive.

It’s more the result of doing it that can make people perceive you as more interesting.

When you have a clear life purpose, you also have clear goals. You know what you’re doing and where you’re going, and few things can distract you.

As mentioned in Personal Excellence, in the long term, this automatically translates into less procrastination, more action, and more life accomplishments.

This determination usually makes people perceive you as confident and centered, which are traits often associated with attractiveness.

2. People Say You Are a Good Listener

If everyone says you are a good listener, you probably do something that makes people feel good around you.

You probably do things like listening with the intent to understand— and not to just convey your opinion .

You don't just wait for your turn to talk like most people, you actually give your undivided attention to others, which makes you a good conversationalist.

If you think about it, we don’t enjoy being around people who interrupt us all the time or redirect every conversation to themselves.

Instead, we feel good talking to people who actively listen to us and make us feel listened to and understood.

Because listening is the way we connect with each other.

According to a study published in the journal Science of Nature, being a good listener is a trait that can help be perceived as more attractive — if you have it, people tend to genuinely enjoy your company and feel safe and understood around you.

3. People Initiate Contact With You More Than You Do With Them

You may be surrounded by people who have the habit of regularly calling and texting those they care about.

However, if all your friends and coworkers tend to initiate contact with you a lot and more than you do with them, it could be a sign people in general tend to enjoy your company — and want to spend more time talking to or hanging out with you.

If you think about it, we usually text, call and want to hang out with the people we care about or simply like. Because we tend to move towards the things that makes us feel good.

Recommended read: How to Become the Best, Most Attractive Version of Yourself: 5 Strategies

4. You Always Follow Through

Does always following through make you special? Or attractive?

Well, I don’t know about you, but for me people who always keep their word are rare. And they always earn my respect.

Let’s be honest. The world is full of people who say, “I’ll take care of this,” and then they don’t. “I’ll let you know,” and then they don’t.

We all know at least a few people who have the habit of making promises they eventually don’t keep.

And we have all been guilty of that at some point of our lives.

This is why if you are someone who consistently keeps their promises, you probably stand out in other people’s mind.

5. You Feel Comfortable Setting Boundaries

Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others.
— Brené Brown

Knowing when to say no is one of the most admirable qualities someone can have.

It means you’re not afraid of what others may think of you, and that you are able to stand up for yourself in virtually any situation.

People who are not afraid of setting boundaries exude confidence. They love themselves enough to make their own mental wellbeing a priority.

And they can earn other people’s respect without the need to be arrogant, aggressive, manipulative or bully.

Some people get upset if you set boundaries with them, and may even try to make you feel bad and guilty for doing that.

That’s why so many people struggle to say no.

And usually the ones who have a hard time setting boundaries are people pleasers and those who have a low self-esteem.

For them, having to say no is a source of stress — since they usually need other people’s approval and external validation to feel good about themselves and see boundaries as a threat to it.

If you feel comfortable setting boundaries, it means you probably have a high self-esteem, don’t let people take advantage of you, and live on your own terms (and not following other people demands and expectations).

Being able to say no usually also means you are able to recognize, accept, and respect other people’s boundaries.

And these are all traits most of us find attractive in others — since they are key to build and maintain strong and healthy relationships.

Recommended read: The Ultimate Guide to Healthy and Strong Relationship Boundaries

Signs You Have an Attractive Personality: Final Thoughts

Sometimes we have some qualities and behaviors other people find attractive in us, and we don’t even realize it.

Here’s a recap of a few signs you are likely more attractive than you think.

1. You have a strong life purpose and are enthusiastic about it;
2. People say you are a good listener;
3. People initiate contact with you more than you do with them;
4. You always follow through;
5. You feel comfortable setting boundaries.

This article was originally published on The Truly Charming