The Best And Worst On B&B, DAYS, GH And Y&R The Week Of Sept. 30 - Oct. 4

CHRISTINE BARTOLUCCI/ABC; CBS; Howard Wise/jpistudios.com

GH's Holly (Emma Samms), Y&R's Victor (Eric Braeden, l.) and B&B's Bill (Don Diamont) helped buoy the soap week.

General Hospital : Holly Lights Up Port Charles

Emma Samms's Holly turned up in Somalia conning a bad guy and then helped bring Lucky back to Port Charles, proving she’s as unpredictable as ever. She was soon knocking on Maxie’s door, asking James, “Are any of the boring grown-ups in?” While Mac took James to school, she nosed around his house and drank his champagne (it’s always 5:00 somewhere in Holly’s world). Upon Mac’s return, she peppered her former brother-in-law for info on Robert and got a stern rebuke: Stay away from Robert, he’s happy!

Across town, WSB honcho Brennan asked Robert if Holly was a security risk. “Absolutely,” replied Robert with a grin. As word filtered through town that “English” was back, Anna and Felicia discussed her role in the escape and Jason defended Holly’s actions by telling Carly that if it wasn’t for Holly’s love for Luke, they’d all be dead.

Holly did love Luke; we watched it. There’s a comforting throughline to this goodhearted con woman setting the town abuzz every time she returns. Note to Diane (Robert's current squeeze): Be afraid, be very afraid!

Bold and Beautiful : Will Speaks The Truth

When Bill shared with Katie that he’d been “thinking,” she replied that’s never a good thing. Their son Will feels the same way. Bill’s entreaties to reunite their family fell on deaf ears with both his ex-wife and his son, neither willing to whitewash Bill’s cheating and reckless behavior. Will cited Bill’s affair with Brooke as a black mark against his dad, which Katie tried to defend, but there’s no excuse for Katie’s husband and her sister falling into bed — and later marrying — and Will knows it.

He’s also not interested in joining his dad at Spencer Publications, choosing instead to intern at Forrester Creations, where Katie works. (A decision prompted by meeting a parade of beautiful models, but still.) “You’ve shed way too many tears over him,” Will told his mom during a surprisingly mature conversation for a kid raised in boarding school. People rarely hold Dollar Bill accountable, but he seems to have met his match in his own son.

Days of our Lives : Body and Soul Is On A Roll

Even if Body and Soul didn’t name-check Soap Opera Digest (!), we’d still get a kick out of watching the machinations of this soap within a soap. Using Chanel’s love scenes with Alex to create conflict between Chanel and her husband Johnny is realistic, as is the actors complaining about their stories. Alex was right when he said Arrow’s romance with Faith was moving too fast and that they should start out by hating each other. “Enemies to lovers, a classic trope,” responded Stephanie, who is clearly a soap fan.

Other classic Salem tropes include B&S being on a tight budget, under the gun time-wise and desperate for free locations. Ditto a rare flower saving Bonnie’s character after Bonnie was told she looked like she had a flesh-eating disease (shout out to that dopey orchid!). As long as this storyline doesn’t take over too much of what is already a pretty soapy soap, it’s a fun diversion full of characters playing nutty versions of themselves.

Or should we say nuttier?

Young and Restless : Victor Pits Audra Against Kyle

Since Y&R is a revolving door of business stories now, Audra ruthlessness was bound to catch up with her. The newcomer had already bounced between a bunch of companies (and slept with Victor’s grandson Noah, former grandson-in-law Kyle, and nemesis Tucker) before Victor hired her at Glissade to work with Kyle. That inspired a vicious volley of backstabbing between the former lovers as both Audra and Kyle tried to prove their worth to The Mustache. Kyle bragged about getting down in the dirt while Audra threatened to bury him and Victor was fine with it until their behavior started impacting their performance.

What to do? Pit them against each other to see who was more “worthy” of working for The Great Victor Newman. Audra dissed Kyle’s loyalty to Jack and Diane, saying it would always interfere with Glissade’s success. Kyle proved her wrong by committing corporate espionage and stealing Jabot scoop from his mom’s computer. Impressed, Victor turned to Audra: “You’re fired.”

Kyle got the upper hand with his boss, but at great cost to the Abbott family. And crossing Audra is always risky business.

B&B: Forcing Hope and Carter Together

Hope’s already been married twice to brothers Liam and Wyatt, been obsessed with her stepbrother Thomas, and stalked her stepsister Steffy’s husband to the point where she rudely kissed Finn on the lips. Carter’s most recent affairs include Hope’s former mother-in-law Quinn, Forrester employee Paris, and Hope’s aunt Katie. Until a week ago, Hope and Carter’s relationship consisted of sitting at a conference table talking about sales of her clothing line. Then he busted this out: “I’ve been thinking about you in lingerie.”

What ? A new couple needs build-up, an inciting incident, something to explain why two people might suddenly become attracted to each other after a decade of knowing each other. Hope's dangerous history with men is a conversation. Carter dating Hope’s aunt is a conversation. Carter’s great love Quinn causing Hope to miscarry Wyatt’s baby is a conversation.
Romance on a soap isn’t one size fits all. Just like real life, it takes work! We want this pairing to work, but the ball is in B&B's court to build that rooting value.

DAYS: Xander’s Vendetta

A list of Xander’s crimes could fill the whole column (smuggling, money laundering, kidnapping, attempted murder) so him vowing to make Brady pay for an offense Brady hasn’t even been tried for is rich. Suddenly Xander thinks he’s this biblical hero vowing to “make that son of a bitch pay!” despite scant evidence Brady ran Sarah down with his car and the fact that Xander’s a way bigger crook than Brady ever was.

And what’s with Xander’s fakakta plan to drug Brady and shoot him in his bed? Even Eric the former priest was like no . “I want to know what you were doing alone in my parents’ house standing over my brother who was dead to the world,” he demanded of the clearly guilty Kiriakis. Great question. If Xander’s willing to commit murder to avenge Sarah’s accident he’s not worthy of her, and if she’s okay with his misguided vengeance she’s as bad as he is. This formerly cute couple’s illogical turn to the dark side is a crime.