It’s Raining Undies, From Out Of The Sky

We do apologize if you only just managed to get “It’s raining tacos” to stop playing on a loop in your brain, but don’t blame us! Blame China. They’re the ones who shot the rain rockets into the sky that caused the Great Underpants Crisis of 2024.

No, we didn’t make that up. Scientists in Chongqing China tried a new approach to climate change. Where those of us who don’t have access to lab equipment simply go outside and shake our fists at the sky when it refuses to rain, in Chongqing scientists have resorted to what is known as cloud seeding.

Wondering what on earth that is? Well, cloud seeding is a weather modification technique that alters a cloud’s ability to produce moisture by introducing teeny tiny ice nuclei into specific types of subfreezing clouds. With the extreme heat certain areas of China’s been dealing with, cloud seeding seems like it might be a good idea, right?

Well, they tried. But instead of rain falling from the heavens to cool the landscape and let the people rejoice, the rockets that scientists fired at the clouds resulted in a freak storm with winds up to 76mph. The result?

The laundry that was drying on apartment balconies across the city suddenly realized that it could fly, and set off to claim its rightful place in the heavens… and then landed all the way on the other side of the sprawling city.

It was literally raining underpants. Not water. Underpants.

As if that isn’t enough to make you chuckle, as scientists scrambled to quickly insist that the freak storm— the one that just happened to occur in conjunction with them poking at the clouds with a stick— was completely natural in occurrence, residents took to social media. That’s right.

Chongqing’s underpants rain has become a viral sensation. Exactly what one wants when one is insisting that the cause of the incident has nothing whatsoever to do with the rockets one sent into the clouds.

To be fair to the residents of Congquing… can you blame them? There they were just going about their business when laundry started falling from the sky. If you found yourself suddenly being pelted with designer sky socks, you’d probably make a TikTok about it too!

Not only that, but some residents had their good clothes out to dry that day. The Calvin Klein jammies, the Michael Kors trousers. Who is going to help clothe these poor sots who had their fancy clothes stolen by science?

Ok, ok. Jokes aside, Chongqing scientists are insisting that the storm had absolutely nothing to do with their little experiment. Whether or not you believe them is up to your discretion; however, we do have to commend them for taking a risk.

When it comes to action on climate change, and making it a little easier to live with the inevitable effects of a climate-altered planet, most would rather risk all of the laundry in their hamper than sid idly by and continue to hope that our weather patterns return to their habits of 20 years ago.

…Even if it means dodging the occasional flying thong in the street.