She counseled others in their grief, then found solace in her own teachings

Not all heroes wear capes. This is especially true in the case of Westwood Regional Middle School counselor Caitlin Fabrocini.

When she's not helping teenagers navigate the uncertainties and pressures at the middle school, she lends a compassionate ear to young people who are dealing with one of the most difficult things in their lives: Grief.

Fabrocini, who lives in Hawthorne, volunteers much of her time at Comfort Zone Camp, a nonprofit in Hardwick, in Warren County, that provides free weekend camps for bereaved children and their families. As a healing circle leader, she facilitates a safe space for group discussion of grief.

Although she hails from Los Angeles, she attended Montclair University and settled in New Jersey because her parents grew up in Bergen County. In 2016, she earned her master’s in school counseling from Montclair.

Learn more about Fabrocini and how she uses her talents to serve children in need with these six things you should know about her.

1. She has received many awards for her counseling work

In 2024, Fabrocini was named Bergen County Counselor of the Year and Bergen County Education Specialist of the Year. Each award has two recipients each year, which Fabrocini feels is important because counseling is a group effort.

“I am very grateful to be honored and to be recognized for my work as a school counselor, but I think it's important for me to share that I do not do this job alone or in isolation,” Fabrocini said. “ … All of my professional efforts are done in a way that has accumulated so much knowledge and understanding from the people that I work with.”

2. She began counseling at Westwood during the pandemic

After working for Saddle Brook Middle School, Fabrocini joined Westwood Regional Middle School in 2020 — right in the midst of the global pandemic. The hybrid school schedule created unique challenges for middle schoolers, who already were experiencing a difficult time in their growth.

“They’re really trying to find the balance between being liked and being authentic to themselves,” Fabrocini said. “And they’re dealing with a lot of peer judgment and self-judgment, their self-confidence; it can be really challenging for them to work through.”

For Fabrocini, who works with the same class of kids until their graduation, creating connections with her students as they learn and grow is the most rewarding part of her career.

“I watch them come in as sixth graders being obviously nervous and overwhelmed and anxious, but excited,” she said. “And then, they really blossom. And they come into that pre-teen and teenage years where their confidence is building, their self-identity is building, and then when they get to eighth grade … they have these great personalities, and they take on great leadership roles.”

3. Her upbringing in Los Angeles inspired her

Some students put on a brave face each day in school, receiving little notice or support from school faculty for their emotional struggles. Fabrocini was one of them. Born and raised in Los Angeles, Fabrocini and her family consistently faced housing insecurity — an experience that ultimately led her to become a school counselor.

While her family moved homes frequently, they believed in the importance of maintaining a regular routine, which included attending school. Even so, it was difficult for Fabrocini to form meaningful relationships with her peers, many of whom did not share her struggle with housing insecurity. The lack of dedicated emotional support from school officials made her experience especially difficult.

As Fabrocini grew older, she knew she wanted to provide this critical assistance to kids, leading her to pursue a career in counseling. She believes her upbringing in Los Angeles allows her to approach the job from an open-minded, multicultural perspective.

“I'm always cognizant of recognizing that everyone is coming from a different background,” Fabrocini said. “But having undergone those hardships myself, and knowing that I put on a brave face every day at school, and that I always came to school with my homework done, and I tried to not let anyone see the cracks — I try to bring that to my day-to-day work, in knowing that even students and children who present as “I'm doing okay,” need just as much care and attention as those who might be crying in your office or expressing a difficult experience. So, I try to meet every kid where they're at. I try to keep an open space for our dialogue to change.”

4. She has volunteered at Comfort Zone Camp since college

While completing her bachelor’s degree at Montclair in 2012, Fabrocini took on an internship at Comfort Zone Camp. After graduating, she was invited to come back as a “big buddy” — a volunteer who works one-on-one with a bereaved child. As a big buddy, she attended healing circles alongside her little buddy.

Although she had not experienced the loss of a loved one in her life at that point, she could connect to the kids because she had experienced grief related to the loss of her home several times.

“They spoke about grief in a way that felt so mature, and they asked questions of each other that were so insightful, and they were empathetic, and they listened, and we cried together,” Fabrocini said. “I sat in that room having never experienced a death in my family before, I never knew loss or grief in that way, but I felt a connection to these kids, because I knew what grief felt like. … I learned a lot about life and I learned a lot about death.”

5. She's run several fundraising marathons for Comfort Zone Camp

“Running changed my life, and I have Comfort Zone Camp to thank for that,” Fabrocini said of her hobby, which she noted has been beneficial to her mental health.

Three years ago, she committed to running her first marathon — the TCS New York City Marathon — to fundraise for Comfort Zone.

She’s run the marathon every year since, raising thousands each year for Comfort Zone. She begins dedicated training in March for the November marathon and attends group fitness classes year-round.

Her experiences helping families through some of the worst times of their lives at Comfort Zone inspired her to begin fundraising.

“We're providing them an opportunity to heal and grow, and I just couldn't imagine a world without this resource,” Fabrocini said. “And so, I do everything that I can to make sure that it's still available and that it's still free for families.”

6. Volunteering at Comfort Zone prepared her when she lost a loved one

When her uncle died, Fabrocini grieved the loss of a loved one for the first time.

“Comfort Zone’s slogan is ‘You are not alone,’ and I really felt that in my camp experience,” Fabrocini said. “So, I keep coming back because I believe that the camp weekend creates magic and some pretty profound healing for our campers and for their families, and we do it for free.”

“I feel like I was a better person for my family members, too, and a better griever for myself,” Fabrocini said. “Knowing that it's okay to laugh, it's okay to cry.”

For more information about Comfort Zone Camp visit comfortzonecamp.org

This article originally appeared on NorthJersey.com: She counseled others in their grief, then found solace in her own teachings