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The Independent
How to keep your friendships alive when life gets busy
By Camilla Foster,
6 hours ago
Be the one who initiates a plan (Alamy/PA)
Navigating friendships in adulthood can be tricky as mounting work pressures, distance and family life demands often get in the way.
Trying to find the perfect time to see all your friends can sometimes feel like an uphill struggle, especially during the busy summer period.
Results from a OnePoll, conducted on behalf of Snapchat , found that out of 1264 women surveyed, more than half (58%) said they plan to invest more time, love and energy into their friendships rather than romantic partners – and we are here for it.
So, here are some top tips about how to keep flourishing friendships when life gets busy…
Schedule regular catch-ups
(Alamy/PA)
In order to maintain friendships amongst life’s craziness you need be proactive and initiate plans.
“I suggest scheduling time for regular catch-ups, even if they’re brief,” recommends wealth and business coach Jessica Crane. “Setting up a monthly coffee date, whether it’s a 30-minute chat or a quick lunch, helps maintain those connections.
“Consistency is crucial, so use scheduling tools to remind you or mark these dates in your calendar as important,” adds the entrepreneur.
Pick your next date while you’re at your current one
On your next friendship date, don’t hug and say goodbye without getting out your calendars and locking in the next time you’ll get together again.
“A common tactic used by your hairdresser, and it’s used for a reason! You’ll always know when your next date is locked in for, versus forgetting about it for a while and then having an even fuller diary to contend with,” says Holly Cooke, Snapchat’s resident friendship expert and founder of The Lonely Girls Clu b. “This could be in person or digitally, but lock that date in, and stick to it!”
Remember to water your friendship
Friendships need water to grow (Alamy/PA)
Friendships are like plants and need to be watered little and often.
“A little bit of love and contact every couple of days, even if that just means sending them a quick direct message, or funny video, helps maintain your foundations and can put a smile on your/their face,” says Cooke. “You don’t need to keep all the love to yourself and save it for one big meet-up. Instead ease the pressure and adopt this method even during the busy periods.”
Crane agrees and adds: “A simple ‘thinking of you’ message can brighten someone’s day.”
Plan activities that evoke shared memories
Watch a film that you all love together (Alamy/PA)
“To strengthen longstanding friendships, plan activities that evoke shared memories – like returning to a favourite café or watching a classic film together,” suggests Crane. “Nostalgia is a powerful tool for rekindling connections, allowing us to celebrate the history we’ve built together.”
Date your friends
Take your friend of a dinner date (Alamy/PA)
Inject a little romance into your friendships.
“Send your bestie a message when they’re least expecting it or schedule a dinner date at a new spot in town you’ve been wanting to try,” advises Cooke. “ Friends make up such a huge part of our lives, and they’re often there for you at your lowest points, so going the extra mile to show you care – just like you would a new relationship – can go a long way.”
Learn to let go Friendship is a two-way thing, so if they aren’t matching your effort or adding value to your life, then it is okay let them go.
“Not all friends are lifelong ride-or-die people; some friends are for a season or city and that’s okay,” says Cooke. “Sometimes we have to learn to let go, whilst still appreciating the friendship for all the memories, crazy nights or beautiful times you had, but knowing that it’s not one that’s going to take you the distance.”
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