The need for speed…. cameras: Part Two

Where to place five speed cameras in Malibu?

By Ben Marcus

Speed cameras are coming to Malibu — hopefully sooner than later — as they wind a circuitous, precipitous route through the California legislature headed for the desk of Gov. Gavin Newsom.

It will be interesting to see where the cameras are installed and the size of the warning signs that are required by law. It will be also interesting to see the numbers these cameras generate once they are installed, because they will be placed along the most egregious public NASCAR track in America, and will most likely dwarf small-town Iowa (see Part One) for citations written, fines paid, and revenue produced.

And hopefully, the number of injuries and deaths reduced.

It’s all about safety, with wheelbarrows full of money just a side effect to the desired effect: The threat of fines slowing people the frick down in the highways and byways between Neptune’s Net and Dukes, and it will be interesting to see what effect the cameras have once they were installed: Less accidents? Less deaths? Safer roads?

Could that money be used to pay for more LACO Sheriff’s and California Highway Patrol to keep a weather eye on PCH and pop speeders in the areas not overseen by the unblinking eye of 21st-century tech?

Maybe use the revenue for CHP and/or LASD to work with a roving camera at hot spots on certain days of the year?Apparently not, as mobile speed cameras are disallowed under the law as it is now written.

Speed checked by drones? These are the days or miracles and wonders, anything is possible and money makes it happen.

Opinions are like Teslas in Malibu — a lot of people have them, and most Malibu citizens have an experiential opinion on where those cameras should be placed, based on their own experience.

As someone who has lived in Malibu off and on since 2003 — including an apartment on PCH just down from the Verizon Building, which required backing out into traffic every day and hearing lots of squealing and the sound of breaking glass. And as someone who was standing and chatting with Derek Schimming (RIP 1964-2024) when that poor man running across PCH at night was hit and killed by a car at the opening of Cliff Diver in  September of 2019. And as someone who now rides along the Malibu Road Dragstrip and crosses PCH on an electric bike: Your Humble Narrator believes these are among the best locations for five speed cameras.

MALIBU ROAD BEHIND RALPHS

As seen from the Malibu Newsstand and while riding the e-bike along there every day, there’s no shortage of “Fast and Furious” wannabes who use Malibu Road as a drag strip. Forget about all the people walking dogs and kids on e-bikes and shattering the general peace and quiet of what used to be PCH — idiots drive like idiots back there, blowing past Station 88 in Hellcats, Porsches, Teslas, and hot cars vintage and futuristic — behind Ralphs and maybe getting air like”Bullit” or “Dirty Harry” over the speed bumps.

Dumb. Irresponsible. Unsafe. Unnecessary. Blink them. Fine them. Publicly shame them. Confiscate their nosy, screechy stinkpots. Dumb.

PCH AND WEBB WAY

I cross this intersection at least once a day on my e-bike and boy howdy, the things I’ve seen. Last winter, when the cliffs were crumbling, a Caltrans truck with a dirt scooper on the front came racing down the hill from west to east and blew through a red light at Webb Way going probably 70 mph.

If someone had pulled in front of them that Caltrans truck would have put them in orbit.

But that’s just one example of a thousand, of citizens flying through that intersection going WAY over the speed limit — especially those heading west who see that long uphill as a red cape to PUNCH IT.

So, the unblinking eye of speed cameras at PCH and Webb Way looking both ways.

Not sure where they would put the warning signs, as they are required to do.

The motorcycle LASD deputies use this as a speed trap and pop speeders all day long, but in the time it takes them to write one ticket, how many speeders blaze by?

Dozens, all day long.

The speed cameras wouldn’t miss any of them. Get ’em! Write ’em up! Slow ’em down!

PCH AND LAS FLORES; PCH AND CARBON CANYON.

Maybe that’s the go: Put cameras at all the traffic lights along PCH. Or if not cameras, then the required warning signs that drivers are entering an area monitored by speed cameras and they will be recorded and fined for exceeding the speed limit.

Carbon Canyon and Las Flores bracket the Dead Man’s Curve area where the four Pepperdine girls were struck by a speeding car.

Would signs and warnings have slowed that person down? I guess we’ll never know.

Zuma Jay thinks installing faux warning signs and cameras would be the go. The cameras don’t record anything, but the signs and the threat of fines would still slow people down.

PCH AND CROSS CREEK

If speed cameras at all the traffic lights are the go, then maybe Cross Creek and PCH is another location. I cross that on my bike sometimes and it’s also harrowing to be stopped and waiting that close to traffic going by at 45 MPH+++.

I wait for several beats after the green “Okay to Cross” hand comes on because of what I saw the other day: A black Tesla going west to east went zizzing right through a red light probably going 70 mph, long after the light had turned red.

Nail people like that. Nail them all, let the city treasurer sort ‘em out.

ALL THE TRAFFIC LIGHTS

Where else? There are traffic lights at PCH and John Tyler, PCH and Corral Canyon, PCH and Paradise Cove, PCH and Trancas Canyon. The infrastructure is there to mount the cameras, so mount them there?

Neither the California Highway Patrol nor the LACO Sheriff’s Department wanted to release statistics on the problem areas of Malibu, or official opinions on where they would place speed cameras based on their own experience and/orstatistics.

But asking reputable, long-time Malibu citizens, there were other ideas:

Suzy Delaplane (trucker, dog lover, retailer): Just after Nobu, going east. If you live along there, you know.

Jefferson “Zuma Jay” Wagner (Former sheriff’s deputy, former Marlboro Man, former mayor, present armorer and surf shop owner): Big Rock & PCH, Las Flores & PCH, The Pier & PCH, Webb Way & PCH, John Tyler & PCH.

I voiced my opinion at meetings about installing several extra poles or potential placement sites. Social media will inform the “speed clubs” where the cameras are.

There is a minimum amount of signage that is required for the installation (site locations). There is no part of the law that indicates the posting of “extra reminder” signs is improper. The cameras could be moved periodically to discover the most effective locations.

Dave Olan (attorney, surfer): From my experience doing primarily personal injury for 30 years, the worst intersection is PCH and Sunset and also by Topanga and Moonshadows. From Sunset to Cross Creek is the biggest concentration of accidents. This is just from handling cases over the years. I’ve had them all over PCH – and bikes are also something that needs to be addressed.

Jill Rapf (Realtor): Between Winding Way and PCH.

Maria Simmonds (USPS official): Las Flores Canyon and Rambla Pacifico, because they are always running both lights: It’s scary to cross the street to go to Dukes!

Dorian Bernard (architectural designer): We also have speed cameras in France, and they are heavily contested. (But French people have the reputation of always protesting, ha ha)

Here is my humble opinion: I think the section from Dukes to Webb Way is the most critical area because of its high population density. I would add a speed camera before these two intersections to reduce people’s momentum before entering this area.

I live and work on Rambla Pacifico, and I’ve witnessed many accidents at the intersection with Las Flores and PCH. Westbound traffic is coming hot here, especially in the morning.

The money could be used to improve PCH infrastructure so people could walk safely along the road or even have a dedicated bicycle lane. But because PCH is only 80 feet wide from Dukes to Carbon Canyon and 100 feet wide from Carbon Canyon to Malibu Creek, this seems unrealistic without removing the middle lane or parking spaces.

Jeff Chertow (Realtor): 1) Big Rock to Las Flores. 2) Las Flores to Carbon Canyon. 3) Webb Way and PCH. 4) Malibu Seafood area. 5) Winding Way Area.

6) Encinal Bluffs to County Line Area.

Ian Holt (armorer, surfer): Cold Canyon Road desperately needs one. The motorcycle guys race that road and there have been numerous fatalities

If you’ve ever been to Oahu, you’ve seen the police cruising in their hot muscle cars, with blinking blue lights always on, on the top. The thinking behind that policy is that when citizens see those blue lights, they will stop breaking whatever law they are breaking — including driving too fast, or erratically.

Speed cameras and warning signs strategically scattered along PCH between Duke’s and Neptune’s Net will hopefully have the same effect.

We can only hope the wheels of legislature spin quickly. (While working on this story, a platoon of LASD SUVs and CHP went screaming west to east on PCH to pull over a young couple who had bolted, then caused an accident close to Cross Creek. Ran into some surfers pulling onto PCH — at speed. And on Friday, June 21, a friend sent a photo of yetanother motorcycle accident at Las Flores and PCH. And so it goes)

PCH is a charnel house. Speed cameras have to happen, and the sooner the better.

And another thought: When these speed cameras go in, Malibu might consider launching a citywide, countywide, statewide, nationwide and worldwide public relations campaign that is an extension of the sign on the side of Paul Grisanti’s pickup truck, parked strategically to send drivers a message: “SLOW DOWN MALIBU.” Or those T-shirts with “GIVE US SPEED CAMERAS! SLOW THE F DOWN!”

Malibu is home to some of the world’s greatest creatives — from Mel Brooks to Bob Dylan to Janusz Kaminski to John Lydon to Spike Jonze. There is a tremendous amount of talent in front of and behind the camera who could produce a series of public service announcements letting the world know — in dramatic or humorous or musical but no uncertain terms — that Malibu is now zero tolerance when it comes to excessive speed and/or erratic driving.

Or use poetry: This idea borrows from the Burma Shave campaign of 1926-63 which displayed a line of rhyming signs selling Burma Shave.

Like those speed camera T-shirts people are wearing now, there could be a caveat campaign like this:

EXAMPLE #1

Speeding tickets?

Not so funny.

Insurance + fines.

Cost you money.

Slow down through Malibu.

Enjoy the scenery.

Save yourself.

A lot of greenery.

EXAMPLE #2

Take it to the limit.

But not above 45.

Drive safe through Malibu.

And arrive alive.

Speed kills on Highway One.

Enjoy the surf and sand and sun.

EXAMPLE #3

Welcome to Malibu.

Now please slow down.

There are traffic cops everywhere.

Don’t make them frown.

Speed limit on PCH is 45.

Please drive safe.

And stay alive.

EXAMPLE #4

Hey there, speeder!

Where’s the fire?

Does your mamma look good.

In funeral attire?

Slow down through Malibu.

Obey the limit.

Or you’re gonna find yourself.

In deep shiznit.

EXAMPLE #5

You can’t drive 45?

You better learn, or you won’t survive.

Take it to the limit, but not beyond

Or soon you will be posting bond.

Malibu is one big speed trap, from Duke’s to Neptune’s Net.

If you speed, you’ll get busted, it’s a sure bet.

Example #6

If your new super car does 185

You’ll lose your license, and not be allowed to drive.

If you feel like something’s watch you.

Speed cameras are.

Slow down through Malibu.

Control your car

Read Part One here.

The post The need for speed…. cameras: Part Two appeared first on The Malibu Times .