The Strawberry Letter: What Does She Do That’s So Amazing?

Dear Steve and Shirley,

My boyfriend is in love with his brother's wife, and he won't admit it. It started as a joke, but now it's starting to get under my skin. I met his brother the same night I met him. His brother had just started dating the lady he married, and that was four years ago. They are married, but my boyfriend and I are not.

My boyfriend idolizes his sister-in-law and compliments her when she's all dressed up, which is all the time. Her hair is short and fly, and she has expensive purses and shoes. She called me last week and asked if we could have a day of pampering together. We got manis and pedis, and had lunch at an upscale hotel before we went to an expensive store downtown to shop. I had only window-shopped there before.

We went straight to look at shoes. I don't have small feet, so I never thought of wearing an expensive pair of shoes, but I ended up spending $800 on some red-sole shoes. After shoes, we went on to the makeup counter, and I had to pay $75 for a lady to put makeup and lashes on me. My boyfriend's sister-in-law was cheering me on the whole way. Before we left, I bought a super tight dress that was on sale, and it showed off my big booty.

I was exhausted, but I was grateful and felt beautiful as I drove home. My boyfriend came over to check me out, and he said it was the most beautiful he's ever seen me. At that moment, my heart sank, and I was so hurt. Then he asked me if I'd ever cut my hair short like his sister-in-law. I am crushed, and he can't understand why.

He said the day I spent with his sister-in-law was for my own good. I feel like he's trying to turn me into something I'm not. Am I wasting my time with him? Will I ever be as amazing as she is?