I went from foster care to the Ivy League, but I did it because of the support around me

Ten years ago, I was sitting in a juvenile detention cell in East Tennessee, alone, wondering if I would get home in time to start high school.

I wouldn’t.

I never made it back home. I entered the custody of the state, spending years in juvenile justice and foster care placements. Eventually, I turned 18 in a Nashville group home and exited the system, alone.

And yet, this year, I graduated from Columbia University with my master of social work. I'm not alone anymore, either.

I’m proud of how far I’ve come, and on the surface, I really thrived throughout my journey. But the truth is the path to get here was uncertain and perilous. Reflecting on this past decade, I don’t see an inspirational montage.

Hard work alone wasn't enough to go from foster care to Ivy League

Instead, I see long periods of struggle, fear, and frustration with brief periods of triumph in between. From the moment I entered state custody to the time I graduated from the Ivy League, I was predominantly focused on navigating crises, trying to prepare for the next and dealing with undiagnosed post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

I went through a lot as a kid, and it only got harder when I became a ward of the state. I had a fractured and subpar education and no idea what stability looked like. So, when I turned 18, I didn’t feel ready to be on my own, much less go to college. I had the will and determination to build a better life for myself, but no experience doing it and no blueprint to follow. I felt lost, and the typical pathways of success seemed inaccessible to someone who came from a life as hard as mine. My intelligence and work ethic alone weren't enough to give me access to a better life in the way I hoped.

Fortunately, there were many good people who cared about me and whose jobs it was to help me succeed. People like my Youth Villages LifeSet specialist, who worked with me each day to overcome barriers, helping with things like college enrollment paperwork, mental health services and financial aid. And people at Monroe Harding , a nonprofit in Nashville, provided me with an affordable, safe space to live. As time went on, I started to see progress. After two years at Nashville State Community College, I transferred to Vanderbilt University.

But we didn't stop at day-to-day tasks.

My specialist helped me create plans beyond what I thought reasonable or even possible at the time, like challenging me to apply to Ivy League schools when I didn't think I had a shot.

Jelly Roll opens songwriting studio at Davidson Country Juvenile Detention Center

They also stuck around when things got hard again.

Youth Villages support kept me in school and helped me dream bigger

During my final semester at Vanderbilt, I was hit by a drunk driver, which totaled my car.

Thankfully, I was physically unharmed, but my car was more than my transportation. I was driving for rideshare apps to pay the bills, so I lost my source of income. At the time, I was so busy trying to finish school and prepare for grad school, I had no time to look for a new job.

The difference between me dropping out of school or sticking with it was the time I spent with my specialist every week, as she helped me keep up with every new demand, like car insurance claims, or sat with me as I cried; her team even connected me to an anonymous donor who paid my tuition for Columbia. That final semester I earned a 4.0 with her help.

I now know I am the main reason for my own success, but I am far from the only reason. My mentors, friends and family couldn’t study for me or take tests for me, but their support ensured I was in a mental and financial position to focus on my personal growth and academic success.

And while I’m happy to be a positive example, it’s important to acknowledge the village of support required for anyone to succeed, particularly those who don’t have the privilege of loving and supportive families. Because thinking beyond how you’re going to get through each day and setting long-term goals is unfortunately a luxury, but it’s one I hope more people can afford. And the only way they will is through more people who have the means and ability to provide mentorship and to support the programs that help us get there.

Tristan Slough holds a bachelor's degree in cognitive studies from Vanderbilt University and a master's degree in social work from Columbia University, and is currently using his personal experience in juvenile justice and foster care to make positive change in the criminal justice system as the student resources coordinator at the Tennessee Higher Education Initiative.

This article originally appeared on Nashville Tennessean: I went from foster care to the Ivy League, but I did it because of the support around me