How Natasha Rothwell Stepped Into Her Power — Again — With Onyx Collective’s ‘How to Die Alone’ on Hulu | Digital Cover

For a show called “How to Die Alone,” Natasha Rothwell’s Onyx Collective series is incredibly heartwarming. The show’s mix of humor, candor and self-reflection is what felt true to Rothwell, who admitted she didn’t want to “pull any punches” as she tapped into her own journey of self-love to create her first show.

“I sat with what scares me the most, and, at the time, it was dying alone … but after 20 plus years of therapy, I realized it’s not dying alone that is the scary part, it’s the dying lonely,” Rothwell said of the series she created, co-showruns and stars in for TheWrap’s latest digital cover story. “I can’t control whether or not I die physically alone … but I can control whether or not I die lonely.”

“How to Die Alone,” which is now streaming on Hulu, follows Mel (Rothwell), an airport worker who reclaims her life after a near-death experience, starting with booking a ticket to the Hawaiian wedding of her ex and co-worker, Alex (Jocko Sims). As Mel conducts what Rothwell identifies as an audit of her professional and personal life, Rothwell used her own past as inspiration for where audiences meet Mel in the pilot.

“To explore that unhealed version of myself in my mid-early 20s, it actually provoked a lot of grace,” Rothwell said, adding that reflection can serve as a “powerful measure of evolution.”

“I was really grateful to be able to revisit myself in those moments where I was just figuring out how to love myself … figuring out how to value myself … how to find my agency and tap into my power and [take] up space.”

The half-hour series was so deeply inspired by Rothwell’s life that she initially named her main character “Natasha” — taking a page from Issa Rae, who named her leading character on HBO’s “Insecure” after herself. Rothwell got a “front row seat” to Rae’s rise as a creator/star during Rothwell’s time as a writer, co-producer and actor on Rae’s “Insecure,” adding that she absorbed “through osmosis” Rae’s wisdom as a multi-hyphenate of her own show, even before Rothwell knew she would be steering a series of her own.

“She just was so fiercely protective of the creative and uncompromising, and I think so often in this industry, and in the world, women of color are asked to compromise or accept less than,” Rothwell said. “To see her unapologetically take up space and unapologetically fight for what she believed in — the story she wanted to tell — I definitely was taking notes on that.”

It was for that reason that “How to Die Alone” landed at Onyx Collective, a Disney-owned brand that curates stories by creators of color and underrepresented voices, despite initially being in development at HBO. Rothwell applauded the company as a “partner that understood” the intentions of the show. “When you are in the process of creating a show, you have a lot of opportunities to betray your goals and your ideas around the show in exchange for getting it made,” Rothwell said. “It was so important for me to hold steadfast to those ideas.”

Like “Insecure,” the project always had Rothwell attached to star, though Rothwell clarified the choice wasn’t made out of vanity, and instead enabled her to push out of the comedy box she felt she was being pushed into.

“I wanted the opportunity to play a character that shows all of the different emotions … was allowed to be a mess [and] was allowed to have highs and lows,” Rothwell said, adding that her entry point in comedy might have stuck in the minds of Hollywood executives. “It can be very binary — it’s just tradition that, ‘Oh, she’s a comedy girl,’ or ‘She’s a drama girl’ … No, I can do both.”

Rothwell took a similar approach to the show’s mix of genres, which combines a workplace comedy with dramatic themes and doses of rom-com sprinkled in for good measure. “Real life is not binary — we wake up and I’m in a rom-com, then by lunch, I’m in a horror story and by the end of the day, it’s like a historical piece,” Rothwell said.

Along Mel’s journey to self-love there are moments of magical realism, when she catches a glimpse of an aspirational version of herself, which Rothwell said helps her “see herself in the world in a way that she’s afraid to do practically.” But there’s also a documentary element to “How to Die Alone,” with each episode’s opening featuring interviews with everyday New Yorkers on the topics tackled in that installment, which range from experiences of breakups to takes on family holidays.

“The thing that I love about documentary, it’s that lean-in moment when you know someone is real and they’re saying real things and they’re telling the truth,” Rothwell said, applauding the direct-to-camera address used in Spike Lee’s films and “When Harry Met Sally.” “What drew me into that story was like, these are real people talking about their success or failures in love … It really doesn’t allow the audience to run away from the conversation — they’re engaging directly.”

That documentary concept is turned on its head in the finale when Mel appears among the slew of New Yorkers just trying to get through the day, which Rothwell hopes will ”provoke grace and … empathy to see that we’re real humans, really living big lives that deserve some understanding and some space.”

“There’s a greater humanity that we ignore when we walk around and we see people,” Rothwell said, adding that “if your waitress doesn’t smile, there’s other shit going on.”

By the finale, Mel has also learned to frame herself as the main character by taking strides in a management program at work and taking a hard look at the relationships in her life, including distancing herself from her self-centered close friend Rory (Conrad Ricamora) and listening to her heart, which has led her back to her ex, Alex, despite her hardest efforts.

After unsuccessfully trying to get over him, Mel is determined to divulge her feelings to Alex in the penultimate episode, and gets the perfect opportunity after he misses his flight to Hawaii. After spending a New Years Eve full of karaoke and fireworks, Mel shoots her shot by kissing him, prompting a confrontation that Rothwell said enabled all the “unspoken things” between them to come to the surface. Their confrontation — which Rothwell revealed was shot in just one take and brought her to tears in the edit — concludes when Alex asks her to tell him she loves him, and she ultimately falters, leading Alex to close the door on the possibility of abandoning his wedding plans to be with Mel.

“He drew a boundary. He’s just like, ‘I can’t love someone who can’t love themselves,'” Rothwell said. “Leaving Mel on the corner of the street just to process that … was necessary in Mel’s story arc — she’s being confronted by the very thing she wants and she can’t get it because she’s in her own way.”

Any progress that Mel has made feels unwound as she stands heartbroken on the street, but she, once again, listens to that aspirational version of herself and switches her ticket to Alex’s wedding for a solo Chicago weekend. Just as one door closes, another opens in the finale as Terrance (KeiLyn Durrel Jones) and Mel slowly realize their friendship is more than that. As the pair prepares to reunite after Mel’s trip in what Rothwell describes as an “Austenian moment” full of the desire and longing found in Jane Austen’s novels, Mel is hit with a new harsh reality as she is suddenly bombarded and arrested for identity fraud.

“Robbing them of that moment gives us an opportunity, I think, to … [explore] it in a new way, because I think it would have been kind of expected if we closed that story,” Rothwell said. “So much of that journey to loving yourself and finding love in someone else — it’s long, it’s sorted. It’s not neat, and it’s not up and back.”

Though “How to Die Alone” has not yet received the greenlight for future seasons, Rothwell and co-showrunner Vera Santamaria have plotted out a four-season arc for Mel . A potential Season 2 would see Mel “continue her journey to falling in love with herself.” “We’ll definitely see her be presented with other opportunities to betray herself, for the sake of short-term satisfaction,” Rothwell said.

Beyond her own series, Rothwell will soon return to Mike White’s “The White Lotus” in its upcoming third season after her character, Belinda, was first introduced in the HBO drama’s inaugural installment. After not appearing in Season 2, Rothwell said it was “such a thrill to be asked back.”

“Mike hit me up, and was just like, ‘Let’s meet for dinner,’ and he talked to me [and said] ‘I’m thinking about you being involved in Season 3 — What do you think?'” Rothwell recalled. “I was like, ‘I will follow you to the ends of the earth … I literally had no idea, hadn’t seen a script [and I] didn’t know what it would be … I’m just so grateful that we just really connected [during] Season 1 — I consider him a friend, and he’s been such a huge support through all of this.”

Indeed, when Rothwell appeared in the first season of “The White Lotus” in 2021 she was a familiar face from “Insecure.” She now returns to White’s show as a creator, star and showrunner herself. Powerful, assured and definitely not alone.

All episodes of “How to Die Alone” are now streaming on Hulu.

Credits:
Design Director: Shannon Barrero Watkins and Ian Robinson
Social Director: Carmen Rivera
Photo Editor/Producer: Maya Iman
Reporter: Loree Seitz
Photographer: Phylicia J. L. Munn
DP: Steven Wetrich
Photo Assistant: Jesse Belvin
Digitech: Tucker Leary
Gaffer: Ethan Conway
Stylist: Meaghan O’connor
Stylist Assistant: Susana Corrales
Hair: Larae Burress
Makeup: Alana Wright

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