Jennifer Lopez Gives First Comments on Ben Affleck Divorce: 'It Feels Lonely, Unfamiliar, Scary'
4 days ago
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"It feels lonely, unfamiliar, scary. It feels sad. It feels desperate. But when you sit in those feelings and go, 'These things are not going to kill me,' it's like actually, I am capable of joy and happiness all by myself. Being in a relationship doesn't define me. I can't be looking for happiness in other people. I have to have happiness within myself," Lopez said of her turbulent summer following her split from Affleck.
The "On the Floor" singer opened up in an new conversation with comedian Nikki Glaser for Interview magazine , where she shared how it feels to be single again after the pair split earlier this year , just two years after rekindling their romance and tying the knot.
"It feels lonely, unfamiliar, scary. It feels sad. It feels desperate. But when you sit in those feelings and go, 'These things are not going to kill me,' it’s like actually, I am capable of joy and happiness all by myself. Being in a relationship doesn't define me," she shared.
"I can't be looking for happiness in other people. I have to have happiness within myself," she continued of finding herself single again at 55. "I used to say I'm a happy person, but was still looking for something for somebody else to fill, and it's just like, 'No, I'm actually good.'"
The couple first sparked split speculation in May with Lopez filing for divorce in August on the two year anniversary of their lavish Georgia wedding.
Things largely came to a head, however, after the release of her album This Is Me … Now and the doc that followed, chronically her relationships over the years and her decades-long love story with Affleck.
"With This Is Me … Now and the project that you mentioned earlier, I felt like, whoa, I got here. I'm good. I did all the work and look at where I am," Lopez said, looking back at the fallout from The Greatest Love Story Never Told -- a project Affleck voiced his opposition to, in part. "And then it was like my whole f--king world exploded."
She did admit, however that she is a "romantic" who "love[s] being in relationships and want[s] to grow old with somebody." However, Lopez said, "We think, 'I have to have that to be whole and happy.' And you don't."
In fact, the Hustlers star said that for the first time in her adult life, she's "not looking for anybody."
That realization took 30 years and a few failed marriages -- the actress was previously married to Ojani Noa, Cris Judd and Marc Anthony before first wedding Affleck in Las Vegas in July 2022.
While she "lovingly" called herself a "dumb bitch" and a "mother f--ker" for wanting a partner, she not believes it's her relationship with herself that is the "most important thing."
"I think we tend to get away from [that] at times, when you're wrapped up with other people." she explained.
"Now I think, with everything that's happened in my life and in my relationships and even in my career, it's like, give yourself a bit of comfort and love," she added. "We've been through a lot of things that nobody knows about, and you've persevered and you refuse to give up and to let it get you down."
While she didn't mention Affleck by name, Lopez further detailed this difficult summer she endured amid their split, which included cancelling her world tour to focus on her family.
"I can't wait to get back out there. I have the most understanding and loving fans in the world. Some fan bases can be spicy. Mine are just a bunch of lovers. I was so devastated to let anybody down, but I just needed to be with my kids and myself and really dig down deep into things that were happening in my life," Lopez said. "And I'm glad I did, because it was a really difficult time for me. Probably the hardest time of my life, but it was also the best time because I got to do that work on myself."
The pictures of Ben Afflec during the relationship are starting to make sense. I think they were thinking things would pick up where they left off. But where they left off was years ago. People change. They've dated and been married in between that time.
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