The Phibes Philes: A Graveyard Smash – The History Of Bobby “Boris” Pickett & The Monster Mash

September is about to bite the dust, which means Halloween will rise from the grave! The spookiest season of them all brings many wondrous things: horror movie marathons, festive beggars trick-or-treating, and the inevitable return of the Monster Mash. While pretty much any spooky song qualifies as a Halloween song, Bobby “Boris” Pickett’s “Monster Mash” is the unquestioned anthem of the season. There have been songs about monsters before and after, but none capture that Halloween spirit quite like the Mash. It crept its way onto the Billboard Hot 100 in 1962 (#1 during the peak of Halloween time), 1970, 1973, and 2021. Notable horror icons such as Alice Cooper, Joe Bob Briggs, Vincent Price, and The Wiggles have all sung a version of the venerable fright favorite. What is it about this song that has captured the hearts of both the living and dead? Why does it continue to dominate the Halloween season? Will Dracula ever get to perform his Transylvania Twist? All these questions and more will be answered within, so prepare your nerves for the shocking true history of “Monster Mash!”

Like all monsters, Bobby “Boris” Pickett was born in Massachusetts. Pickett was an aspiring actor who also happened to sing with a band called the Cordials. During a rendition of the Diamonds’ “Little Darlin’.” Pickett recited the monologue within the song as horror great Boris Karloff. The audience ate it. Fellow band member Lenny Capizzi encouraged Bobby to become Boris, and they wrote the Mash together. Pickett initially wanted to call the song “Monster Twist,” but Capizzi preferred “Monster Mashed Potato.” As that fact would suggest, it was meant to be a spoof of dance hits like “The Twist” and “Mashed Potato Time.” “In less than two hours, we had the whole thing,” Pickett said. “We did it on a Wollensak tape recorder.”

“Monster Mash” was taken to four major labels, who all rejected it. Producer Gary S. Paxton pressed a thousand copies on his own Garpax label and delivered them to radio stations all over Southern California. And like that thing on Colin Clive’s slab, it was alive! As previously mentioned, the song rose to the top of the charts, becoming an unexpected sensation for the noble Karloff knock-off. Following the success of the Mash, Pickett released his first and only album, “The Original Monster Mash.” Though it is unfortunate that Pickett only released one album, it does so happen to be the single greatest album of all time. With such monster-themed songs as “Me and My Mummy,” “Rabian – The Fiendage Idol,” and “Skully Gully,” “The Original Monster Mash” is a must for Halloween. I recommend it to everyone with a heart and a soul. If that isn’t enough, I give you this: Drac does indeed get his “Transylvanian Twist.”

Many mock Pickett for driving “Monster Mash” into the ground. Those are jealous people who can only dream of giving the world something as beautiful as the Mash! If you create something beloved by generations, it’s only fair that you get to capitalize on it. And dear Bobby-Boris certainly did. The first real attempt at recapturing the magic was “Monsters’ Holiday,” a swell tune I listen to every Christmas. The only issue with it is that Lon Chaney Jr. recorded a version of it, so Pickett was beaten at his own game by the honest-to-goodness Wolf Man. In 1983, Pickett dropped “Monster Rap,” which is exactly what it sounds like. Folks groan when you bring this one up, but I always sorta dug it. In 2004 and 2005, Pickett provided vocals for flash videos “Monster Slash” and “Climate Mash,” which poke fun at George W. Bush. Timeless.

In 1995, Bobby-Boris turned “Monster Mash” into a movie called–get this—“Monster Mash.” Based on his stage musical, “I’m Sorry the Bridge Is Out, You’ll Have to Spend the Night,” Personally, I like this one. It’s a low-budget musical about some squares that get stranded and forced to stay at a spooky castle inhabited by a kooky mad scientist and his creepy servants. If it sounds like I just described the basic premise of “The Rocky Horror Picture Show,” you should know that was my immediate thought about five minutes into the movie. However, here’s the (Transylvanian) twist: “I’m Sorry the Bridge Is Out, You’ll Have to Spend the Night” came out in 1967; “The Rocky Horror Show” (the original play) is from 1973. Did Bobby-Boris inspire “Rocky Horror?” We may never know for sure. But “Monster Mash” has two things “Rocky Horror” lacks: John “The Cryptkeeper” Kassir as Igor and a mummified Elvis.

For you, the living, this Mash was meant, too. In that spirit, I will teach you how to do the actual Monster Mash. Like how Dee Dee Sharp’s “Mashed Potato Time” gave us The Mashed Potato dance, “Monster Mash” gave us The Mash. And not-so-coincidentally, The Mash follows the same foot movements as The Mashed Potato. First, you step backward with one foot with that heel tilted inward. The foot is positioned slightly behind the other foot. With the weight on the ball of the starting foot, the heel is then swiveled outward. The same process is repeated with the other foot: step back and behind with heel inward, pivot heel out and it goes on from there. What’s the difference between The Mash and The Mashed Potato? Well, here was Bobby “Boris” Pickett’s innovation: you stretch your arms out like Frankenstein.

I poked a little fun at Bobby-Boris, but I genuinely believe “Monster Mash,” the song is a masterpiece. From its eerie opening with the sound of coffin lids and chains to its ruinously catchy chorus, it’s a bonafide classic of novelty or Halloween and pop music in general. I remember singing it with my grandfather when I was little and singing it with my full-grown co-workers about a year ago. The Mash, as silly as it is, does make many people happy, even when it isn’t the 31st of October. In the immortal words of Igor, “Mash good!”