Dadchelor Parties: Some Moms Hate 'Em, While Other Moms Welcome Them

If you're expecting a baby sometime soon, your partner may approach you with a buzzy new idea: having a dadchelor party. And you can probably blame TikTok for it — many dads-to-be are sharing about their bachelor-style weekends that celebrate their upcoming journey into fatherhood.

The What to Expect Community is totally divided on the trend: Some moms-to-be see it as a great way for their partners to celebrate before the big day. However, there are plenty of others who would rather their partner stay home as their due date approaches, especially if there are older kids to take care of.

What is a dadchelor party?

The overarching definition of a “dadchelor party” is a celebration with friends and family honoring the dad-to-be before his baby arrives. While some guys go for a round of golf and dinner or a night out on the town, others have turned it into a bachelor party 2.0 by traveling to another city for a weekend away. If you’ve never heard of dadchelor parties, we’ve seen similar terms like man showers and diaper parties used to describe the celebrations, too. The trending mom-centric alternative is a hatchelorette, a more relaxing version of a classic bachelorette party.

Since they're ultimately a twist on a “bachelor party,” dadchelor parties often connote a wild night out that only promotes pre-baby debauchery (as one dad pointed out, bottle service will look a lot different in a few short weeks!). That said, some have shared that it’s a rare opportunity to gather with loved ones for quality time, and one mom explained that it helps her husband carve out time to get parenting advice from experienced dads.

Similar to a baby shower, hosts typically select a theme based on the future dad’s interests (just look at this one thrown for a Star Wars fan). The “when” is perhaps the most important part here, though, since the dachelor will want to schedule it well before your baby’s due date. After all, the last thing anyone wants is Dad missing baby’s arrival because it conflicts with his dadchelor party!

Moms in the What to Expect community share why they’d support a dadchelor party

“I actually loved that my husband's best friends threw him a diaper party (that’s what we call it in Missouri). But my husband does a lot to help me make sure I have my me time too. I don’t think it’s fair to not both be celebrated!” — MamaHol1

“I encouraged my husband to go on two separate trips with 'the boys' of different groups. It’s different having me around (especially now that I’m so pregnant). I think it’s important that the men get to go and enjoy themselves.” — Kleenguyen

“I am a big event person and I think this is adorable! I'm the type of person that would plan something like that for my husband or get his brother and dad to do it had I thought of it before we had our first child! During the pregnancy, all attention goes to mom, so why not let dad celebrate too?" — sweetbaby2finally

“I think this is super cute! My husband does a cabin boys weekend once a year and I think it’s great for our relationship for him to get some boy time in. He drinks and smokes cigars. I would not be mad if he did this or if he was invited to this because, in turn, I do get time with my girlfriends. Time away from your spouse and a chance to spend quality time with friends is important!” — kmtmarie

“A “dad”chelor party is just another name for a man shower. I don’t think it’s meant to be something wild, just a party to celebrate the new dad. I’m planning one for my husband because he’s in the Army and tends to work a lot. I don’t want him to feel like this is all about me and the baby, so I want to plan one for him and his friends to drink and have fun…plus he’s the only one out of all of friends who doesn't have kids yet, so I think it would be cool to celebrate him and for them to offer dad advice.” — southernflower

“Let the dad be celebrated too. Sure, guys will celebrate a bit differently, but maybe they'll also bring diapers, swap stories and get advice from other dads' perspectives. I don't think it's silly at all, and would be fully supportive if my guy were to do or have something like this.” — JessMamax7

Other moms oppose their partner’s dadchelor dreams

“I’m all for the guys getting together to have fun and hang out, don’t get me wrong. But the fact that they somehow think they should take a full weekend for these stupid trips is beyond ridiculous to me.” — jen26jen

“This is the stupidest thing I have ever heard of in my life. You’re the one growing the human and basically giving up your body for months — why should he get a whole fun weekend away? His part of the pregnancy was the fun part!” — scrunchymom31

“I think it's just the name that throws me off so much...like I fully support my husband having a diaper party and going out with his buddies. But the idea of calling it a dadchelor party just makes it sound like a bachelor party where they are gonna go out, get wasted and be foolish.” — jax0092

“The name is definitely stupid. Guys, if you wanna hang out with your friends, just do it!” — baltimeow

“Maybe I’m just salty because we get to ‘celebrate’ with awkward baby showers that are super boring for most people and the dad gets to go to a hockey game and drink with his buddies for a day. I’d rather do that!” — sara2127

“It sounds like they’re celebrating his ‘last days of freedom’ before parenthood like they do before the wedding. They say dads aren’t dads until the baby is born. It just makes me roll my eyes.” — Alk32

Here’s how to navigate a dadchelor debate at home

Have an open and honest conversation about how a dadchelor party makes you feel. If he’s having one, talk about when they'll go, where they'll go and what the activities will be when they get there. Setting expectations will keep everyone comfortable, especially if your due date is fast approaching. This is especially important if you have other kids at home that need to be cared for while dad is celebrating.

Below, moms in the What to Expect community share how they’d handle the topic (including some tips on planning one!):

“I’d just plan a separate weekend for yourself too, and tell him he’s on dad duty [for our older children] from the time he gets home on Friday night until bedtime on Sunday night. You can go by yourself or with friends on a weekend getaway with massages, mani/pedis, and whatever else you feel like doing.” — Ambergerr

“My husband’s friends took him to a basketball game last night and I think that was perfect! A guy's night out is totally fun and sweet but a weekend is a lot, especially with a toddler!" — BabyMH2024

“I planned a night out for my hubby and his friends a few weeks ago. I had his best friend help me plan it and coordinate it. My hubby has been by my side every step of the way and has stepped up and done more than I can put into words. I wanted to thank him for everything he has done by giving him time to just hang out with his boys. A day of golfing and poker at night helped him relax! He needed it. I don’t think I would have been okay if he went out and got drunk as skunk or anything like that but he needed a day to relax.”  — SharonSB

Ultimately, the dadchelor concept is something to talk through together as parents-to-be. Discuss logistics so everyone feels good about it and if you have hesitations, definitely voice those to your partner. This way you will both find a way to celebrate that feels right for your growing family.