“Nobody Needs To Be That Stoned, That Fast” – Throwback To Sturgill Simpson’s Hilarious Dab-Gone-Wrong Story From ‘The Joe Rogan Experience’

Even Sturgill Simpson can get a little ahead of himself sometimes. Sturgill - also known as Johnny Blue Skies circa 2024 - had quite the story to tell six years ago when he was a guest on The Joe Rogan Experience . Though Simpson shared a lot of interesting tidbits about music, his creativity and his life at the time (as he has across his multiple JRE podcast visits), the anecdote that stands out above the rest could best be described as a dab-gone-wrong. The artist was visiting with some friends out west and wasn't familiar with the power of a dab - which if you didn't know is highly concentrated cannabis that's heated up and inhaled (to be fair, I didn't really know that either). To make a long introduction shorter, Sturgill wasn't familiar with the power of the dab, and that led to quite the wild experience, as he explained to Joe Rogan: "I never was a bong guy. It's too heavy man. I got sh*t to do. Or the dab thing? I got friends in Colorado and California now... first time I ever did that sh*t, this is a pretty embarrassing story, but my buddies, they roll pretty hard. I'm not really a heavy smoker to be honest with you. The first time I did that sh*t, I didn't know what it was. I just pulled it like it was a big ol' bong rip and then everybody's face was like, 'Oh.' You instantly know you've done something you shouldn't have. I was like, 'Oh f**k man.'" Simpson describes the effects as almost immediate, and stated he instantly felt cold and clammy. Those feelings quickly graduated to feeling overwhelmingly nauseous, which led to Sturgill seeking out the nearest sink to throw up in (that would be a great flex to say, 'Sturgill puked in my sink'). Still feeling the disorienting effects of the dab, Simpson bravely decided to head home - and he was on his own in doing so. He was in rough shape, and the side effect as though he was death's door: "I'm pretty sure I'm dying. So we lived in this apartment and I went out the door and turned the corner to go down the hallway to mine and it was full on vertigo. Every time I took a step, the hallway got twice as long. I was like, 'This is f**ked up.' I was sitting down in the hallway just trying to get my sh*t together man. And I thought I was having a f**king heart attack. I remember this voice saying, 'Get up you stupid junkie f**k before somebody comes out here and sees you sitting in the hallway like a dumbass.' I managed to pop out of it and as soon I got back to my place and sat down on the couch, everything was fine." Sounds like the horrendous trip finally came to a conclusion once Sturgill was in the comforts of his own home. And if I had to guess, Simpson has most likely never partaken the same, highly concentrated cannabis ever again. He made that pretty clear with his last statement as he wrapped up his story: "Nobody needs to be that stoned, that fast. I'm sorry." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-ARuW04laA