Red flags: What is 'grooming' and how can parents keep kids safe from abuse?

Grooming is not illegal in Ohio , even though experts say most child sex abuse cases start with it.

Grooming behaviors are "manipulative behaviors that the abuser uses to gain access to a potential victim, coerce them to agree to the abuse, and reduce the risk of being caught," according to the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network . The organization is also known as RAINN.

Ohio lawmakers are working to criminalize these red flags through a bill that was introduced to the Statehouse in November 2023. The bill passed the House and is awaiting a Senate vote.

Innocent words or predator's trap? The trouble with making grooming illegal

James Bogen, a defense attorney in Cincinnati, said he sees potential issues with the proposed legislation. Regardless, he said, it's up to parents to make sure their kids know when to say “no” and when to speak up about dangerous encounters.

“There is no substitute for vigilant parenting,” Bogen said.

Heidi Malott, clinical program manager for the Mayerson Center for Safe and Healthy Children at Cincinnati Children's , spoke with The Enquirer about the dangers of grooming and red flags parents should watch for.

These behaviors can be hard to clock, Malott said, because they often look like normal interactions. Also, perpetrators are often close, seemingly trusting adults already in your child's life.

"We spent so much time on stranger danger, and stranger danger's not the problem," Malott said. "Ninety-five percent of kids know the person who's abusing them."

Here are common grooming behaviors and patterns, according to Malott:

• Desensitizing a child to physical touch.
• Desensitizing a child to talking about sex.
• Keeping secrets.
• Giving gifts.
• Isolating a child from their family and friends.
• Sleepovers.

If you are experiencing sexual abuse, call the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 800.656.HOPE (4673). You will be routed to a local Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network affiliate organization based on the first six digits of your phone number.

This article originally appeared on Cincinnati Enquirer: Red flags: What is 'grooming' and how can parents keep kids safe from abuse?