The Name Of The Game At NHL Draft

In a previous story, we matched teams and draftable players listed by NHL Central Scouting. Unlike other mock drafts, our system relied not on need, best player available, or skill set, but on the sure-fire method of first and last names.

However, a perfect fit wasn't available for nine of the 32 teams which will be making selections at the 2024 NHL Draft later this month.

We certainly don't want to leave the Lightning, Canadiens, Rangers, Blue Jackets, Wild, Blackhawks, Oilers, Kings, and Utahs with nothing to do in Las Vegas. So we've assembled the best names left on the board - with expert analysis, of course.

MASSE, MAXIM     6' 2"    186    Right Wing    CHICOUTIMI    QMJHL

• It stands to reason that a winger named Max Masse would be nearly impossible to knock off the puck. Defenders would bounce right off. He might have trouble moving his feet, though.

ZELLERS, WILLIAM 5' 10"  163 Left Wing  SHATTUCK-ST.MARY'S HIGH-MN

• A team can choose to be buyers at the trade deadline and Zellers on draft day.

MCMORROW, BRENDAN     6' 0"    175    Left Wing    USA U-18    NTDP

• If he's not chosen on Day 1 of the draft, Brendan's agent can remind him of what Little Orphan Annie said: "McMorrow, McMorrow, I love ya, McMorrow, you're only a day a-way."

MOLINE, AUSTIN 6' 4" 193 Defenseman SHATTUCK-ST.MARY'S HIGH-MN

• Austin Moline would prefer to play in Texas or Illinois.

VAISANEN, JOONA     6' 0"    175    Defenseman    DUBUQUE    USHL
MAYES, NATHAN     6' 4"    194    Defenseman    SPOKANE    WHL

• To go deep into the postseason, you need a d-pair which will still be playing in Mayes and Joona.

HE, KEVIN     5' 11"    182    Left Wing    NIAGARA    OHL
MAN, MATYAS   6' 3"  187   Defenseman  VITKOVICE JR.  CZECHIA-JR.

• Teams need toughness as well as skill. A He-Man combo fits the bill.

GOOD, JACK  5' 9" 172  Left Wing  ST. ANDREWS COLLEGE  HIGH-ON

• A general manager tired of being asked, "Why did you pick so-and-so?" each year will have a ready-made answer this time. "Because he's Good."

USTINKOV, DANIIL 6' 0"    198    Defenseman    ZURICH    SWISS
BADINKA, DOMINIK 6' 3"    183    Defenseman    MALMO    SWEDEN
DUDOROV, VADIM  6' 0"  180    Right Wing    YAROSLAVL JR.    RUSSIA-JR.

• For the same reason, teams with hyper-critical fan bases might want to shy away from U-stink-ov, Bad-inka, and Dud-orov.

PIKKARAINEN, KASPER  6' 3" 194 Right Wing TPS JR.    FINLAND-JR.
DAVIDSON, HYDE     6' 2"    165    Defenseman    SEATTLE    WHL
FLUKER, JOSH     6' 0"    160    Defenseman    WENATCHEE    WHL

• Sure, they have high upsides. But Kasper sometimes disappears, Hyde has good days and bad ones, and Fluker succeeds almost by accident. (I could be completely wrong on all three; I'm judging by names only)

MUSTARD, JOHN     6' 0"    180    Center    WATERLOO    USHL
PRIDHAM, JACK     6' 1"    176    Right Wing    WEST KELOWNA    BCHL

• One lucky team will draft both these players and put them on the same line. Because Ham is always better with Mustard. Maybe these are the right linemates for the Rangers' Artemi Panarin - the Bread Man.