Did anyone actually know the ESPYs were on last night? I'm honestly stunned... I spend all damn day on the internet, writing and editing blogs, making social media posts, creating content... I didn't hear a THING about it other than some noise two weeks ago about Prince Harry
getting the Pat Tillman award (which was reportedly fixed by Disney CEO Bob Iger). Anyways, the 2024 ESPY Awards were last night, hosted by tennis legend Serena Williams, and aside from the obligatory Caitlin Clark jokes (still, with a touch of shade and bitterness), and a LeBron James hairline quip, the big talking point of the night was Serena taking a shot of Kansas City Chiefs kicker, Harrison Butker. Color me shocked... https://twitter.com/awfulannouncing/status/1811585393973956933 Of course, Harrison sent the media world into a tailspin earlier this year when he gave the
commencement speech Benedictine College, a private,
very Catholic college in Kansas. I went to a private Catholic college too, DePaul University in Chicago, and let's just say... they're not the same. Devout Catholics actually go to Benedictine... Butker spent a good chunk of the 20-minute speech talking about the students honoring God, persevering through COVID, becoming effective leaders, and the role that Christians are called to play in society. And the part that send the world over the edge, he spoke directly to the women in the crowd. He said:
"For the ladies present today, congratulations on an amazing accomplishment. You should be proud of all that you have achieved to this point in your young lives. I want to speak directly to you briefly because I think it is you, the women, who have had the most diabolical lies told to you. How many of you are sitting here now about to cross this stage and are thinking about all the promotions and titles you are going to get in your career? Some of you may go on to lead successful careers in the world, but I would venture to guess that the majority of you are most excited about your marriage and the children you will bring into this world." He went on to praise his wife for being his rock, the educator of their children, and the cornerstone of his successful football career: https://twitter.com/thattradgal/status/1790577954520432862 And here's the thing... he wasn't wrong. We have to remember that he was speaking directly to a group of Catholic young women who hold the idea of being a wife and mother in very high regard. And yes, a number of women, especially in the Christian community, do look forward to finding a man, getting married, having children and being a mom. It's ok if
you don't, but a lot of women do. As a man... being a husband and father is the single greatest joy of my life. And for my wife, who is very accomplished in her career at the moment, it's the single greatest joy in her life. And she can't wait to stay home with our two small children in the next couple years (soon honey, I promise). My point is, I don't think Butker was saying "good job at college, now all you woman need to get in the kitchen." He was AFFIRMING a belief that many young women share, both Christian and otherwise, that being a wife and mother is an incredibly important, fulfilling, and meaningful vocation to aspire to, and that you don't have to let society make you feel worthless if you don't climb the corporate ladder. It's ok to want to be a wife and mother, and many women will find more purpose and fulfillment in their family than they ever will in their job. And some won't... and that's ok, too. You know who ironically found A LOT of meaning and purpose in being a mother... Serena Williams. Serena is one of the most dominant tennis players of all time, arguably one of the most dominant athletes of all time... period. 23 Grand Slam singles titles, 14 Grand Slam doubles with sister Venus, and yet, she called being a mother the "greatest accomplishment" of her life. More accomplished than any of us, more accomplished than 99.9% of women AND men, and she says that being a mother and raising her children has been her greatest accomplishment.
"The last 2 years have been my greatest accomplishment." https://www.instagram.com/serenawilliams/p/B13pSRjnwv0/ And really, that's all Harrison was trying to say... to a room full of Catholic young women, who largely hold those same values. So if someone as accomplished as Serena Williams can admit that being a mom is her greatest accomplishment, why the hate? Why is the media so quick to jump down Harrison's throat over his comments? And why is Serena herself, who in so many words has openly admitted to sharing those values, taking aim at him? Believe me, it's not lost on me that women are the ones who generally have to sacrifice their careers to birth and raise children. In a
Vogue write up on her retirement, Serena herself, writes that she reluctantly gave up tennis to have a family:
"I never wanted to have to choose between tennis and a family. I don’t think it’s fair. If I were a guy, I wouldn’t be writing this because I’d be out there playing and winning while my wife was doing the physical labor of expanding our family. Maybe I’d be more of a Tom Brady if I had that opportunity." She's not wrong... being pregnant and then giving birth is a time-consuming, physically, spiritually and emotionally demanding, process that has been uniquely gifted to women. And that's really where the crux of this lies... being a mom is UNIQUE to women. I've watched my wife deliver two children, without an ounce of pain medication both times (she might've been a Viking warrior in a past life) and it's incredible. It's beautiful. And I don't think most of us men could do it... honestly. And while I watched it all unfold and was alongside her the entire way, pregnancy, and now motherhood, is her journey. One that many women, not all of them, but many... look forward to, and are willing to trade their careers for. Even the most incredible of careers... like tennis GOAT. Does it suck that many women have to choose between family and career? Yeah, it does, and I think the maternity (and paternity) leave systems are utterly broken in this country. And as a business owner, I'm not naive to the other side of the coin. But life is all about making choices, choosing paths, and making sacrifices that will hopefully bring you fulfillment and purpose. Society thrives when its people find meaning and purpose in what they're doing. It's mine, Harrison's, and even Serena Williams' belief, despite her dumb joke, that having a family yields an incredible amount of meaning and purpose. And yet, our society RAGES over this notion... Meanwhile, we've seen dozens and dozens of NFL players who have beaten women, strangled their partners (looking at you Tyreek Hill), knocked them unconscious (Ray Rice), sexually assaulted dozens (Deshaun Watson) and yet, Harrison Butker is the villain to the mainstream media? He's the punching bag at these stupid award shows that nobody watches? And never mind the fact that men are invading women's sports left and right so much so that Serena Williams daughters won't even be able to compete in women's tennis when they grow up. But no, Harrison Butker and your Christian family values... you're the problem. Make no mistake, the media will continue to vilify Butker for his comments, and yet... his teammates, his coach, his quarterback and Taylor Swift's new boyfriend (the people who know him best) will continue to defend his character: https://twitter.com/CriddleBenjamin/status/1793496758783533332
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